Disgusterous

Author Topic: Hat, coat...  (Read 172211 times)

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Online Barman

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3240 on: May 25, 2020, 06:10:46 AM »
Just got back from my local Tesco.........


I saw a bloke buying four crates of San Miguel, five Paellas, and three sombreros.



I thought to myself,



Hispanic buying............

AFFS... ::)

https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?topic=14051.msg685112#msg685112
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Offline Just One More

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3241 on: May 25, 2020, 09:29:33 AM »
Bought a thesaurus from eBay, I just got home, it's been delivered. I've opened it, I canít believe it all the pages are blank

I canít find the words to tell you how pissed off I am !
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Steve

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3242 on: May 25, 2020, 09:57:31 AM »
Bought a thesaurus from eBay, I just got home, it's been delivered. I've opened it, I canít believe it all the pages are blank

I canít find the words to tell you how pissed off I am !
lol: lol: lol:
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline apc2010

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3243 on: May 25, 2020, 10:07:18 AM »
Bought a thesaurus from eBay, I just got home, it's been delivered. I've opened it, I canít believe it all the pages are blank

I canít find the words to tell you how pissed off I am !
lol: lol: lol:

 ;D ;D ;D

Offline apc2010

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3244 on: May 25, 2020, 03:46:38 PM »
Tesco's online shopping is crap................................


I ordered some dates and they sent me a calendar........ noooo:

Offline apc2010

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3245 on: May 28, 2020, 01:00:19 PM »
A woman is at home when she hears someone knocking at her door. She goes to the door opens it and sees a man standing there. He asks the lady, "Do you have a Vagina?" She slams the door in disgust.
The next morning she hears a knock at the door, itís the same man and he asks the same question to the woman, "Do you have a Vagina?" She slams the door again.
Later that night when her husband gets home she tell him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells his wife in a loving and concerned voice, "Honey, I am taking tomorrow off so as to be home, just incase this guy shows up again."
The next morning they hear a knock at the door and both ran for the door.
The husband whispers to the wife, "Honey, iím going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to see where he's going with this."
She nods yes to her husband and opens the door. Sure enough the same fellow is standing there, he asks, "Do you have a Vagina?"
"Yes I do." says the lady............


The man replies, "Good, would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife's alone and start using yours!".............. redface:

Offline Steve

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3246 on: May 28, 2020, 01:25:46 PM »
A woman is at home when she hears someone knocking at her door. She goes to the door opens it and sees a man standing there. He asks the lady, "Do you have a Vagina?" She slams the door in disgust.
The next morning she hears a knock at the door, itís the same man and he asks the same question to the woman, "Do you have a Vagina?" She slams the door again.
Later that night when her husband gets home she tell him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells his wife in a loving and concerned voice, "Honey, I am taking tomorrow off so as to be home, just incase this guy shows up again."
The next morning they hear a knock at the door and both ran for the door.
The husband whispers to the wife, "Honey, iím going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to see where he's going with this."
She nods yes to her husband and opens the door. Sure enough the same fellow is standing there, he asks, "Do you have a Vagina?"
"Yes I do." says the lady............


The man replies, "Good, would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife's alone and start using yours!".............. redface:
Affs  https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?topic=9750.msg368542#msg368542
Well, whatever nevermind

Online Barman

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3247 on: May 28, 2020, 01:42:48 PM »
A woman is at home when she hears someone knocking at her door. She goes to the door opens it and sees a man standing there. He asks the lady, "Do you have a Vagina?" She slams the door in disgust.
The next morning she hears a knock at the door, itís the same man and he asks the same question to the woman, "Do you have a Vagina?" She slams the door again.
Later that night when her husband gets home she tell him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells his wife in a loving and concerned voice, "Honey, I am taking tomorrow off so as to be home, just incase this guy shows up again."
The next morning they hear a knock at the door and both ran for the door.
The husband whispers to the wife, "Honey, iím going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to see where he's going with this."
She nods yes to her husband and opens the door. Sure enough the same fellow is standing there, he asks, "Do you have a Vagina?"
"Yes I do." says the lady............


The man replies, "Good, would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife's alone and start using yours!".............. redface:

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3248 on: June 02, 2020, 04:33:52 PM »
My friend looked at me like I was crazy when I told him I had named my new born baby boy "Samsung"...........




I thought it had a nice ring to it............... redface:

Online Grumpmeister

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3249 on: June 03, 2020, 10:37:35 PM »
My friend looked at me like I was crazy when I told him I had named my new born baby boy "Samsung"...........




I thought it had a nice ring to it............... redface:

 facepalm:
Praise Z0rg!

Online Barman

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3250 on: June 04, 2020, 03:32:51 AM »
My friend looked at me like I was crazy when I told him I had named my new born baby boy "Samsung"...........




I thought it had a nice ring to it............... redface:

 facepalm:

facepalm: facepalm:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3251 on: June 04, 2020, 04:38:32 PM »
I said to my mate,......... "My wife keeps asking me if I'm an Alice in Wonderland character, and it's getting very annoying!"............




He said, "Are you mad at her?".............. redface:

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3252 on: June 04, 2020, 04:41:19 PM »
I said to my mate,......... "My wife keeps asking me if I'm an Alice in Wonderland character, and it's getting very annoying!"............




He said, "Are you mad at her?".............. redface:

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3253 on: June 04, 2020, 10:14:51 PM »
I had a dream last night that I wrote the Hobbit and Lord of the rings ....




I was Tolkien in my sleep .................. redface:

Offline Steve

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3254 on: June 04, 2020, 10:22:15 PM »
I had a dream last night that I wrote the Hobbit and Lord of the rings ....




I was Tolkien in my sleep .................. redface:
lol:
Well, whatever nevermind