Disgusterous

Author Topic: Fresh from the Inbox  (Read 433341 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

Online Nick

  • Needs to get out more...
  • ******
  • Posts: 100819
  • Reputation: -115
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5835 on: April 05, 2020, 01:44:05 PM »
An Englishman, an Irishman, a Welshman and a Scot are captured by the Iraqis.

The Iraq troop leader says, "we"re going to shoot you, but we will give you one last request." He says to the Welshman, "what"s your last request?"

The Welshman says, "I want a thousand Welshman singing "Land of my Fathers".

""Okay, you"ve got it. What about you?" he says to the Scotsman."

I want a thousand Scots pipers piping Scotland the brave," says the Scot.

"You"ve got it" says the Iraqi. "What"s your last request?" he says to the Irishman.

"I want a thousand Irishman doing the River-dance" says Paddy."

It"s yours" says the Iraqi. Turning to the Englishman, he says, "and your last request?"

The Englishman says, "f*cking shoot me first".
Warning: May contain Skub
Cat sitter extraordinaire
Semi-professional crocodile

Online Barman

  • Administrator
  • Needs to get out more...
  • *****
  • Posts: 133675
  • Reputation: -49
  • Since 1960...
    • Virtual Pub!
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5836 on: April 05, 2020, 01:59:15 PM »
An Englishman, an Irishman, a Welshman and a Scot are captured by the Iraqis.

The Iraq troop leader says, "we"re going to shoot you, but we will give you one last request." He says to the Welshman, "what"s your last request?"

The Welshman says, "I want a thousand Welshman singing "Land of my Fathers".

""Okay, you"ve got it. What about you?" he says to the Scotsman."

I want a thousand Scots pipers piping Scotland the brave," says the Scot.

"You"ve got it" says the Iraqi. "What"s your last request?" he says to the Irishman.

"I want a thousand Irishman doing the River-dance" says Paddy."

It"s yours" says the Iraqi. Turning to the Englishman, he says, "and your last request?"

The Englishman says, "f*cking shoot me first".

 lol: lol: lol:
Pro Skub  Thumbs:

Offline Steve

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 46427
  • Reputation: -3
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5837 on: April 05, 2020, 02:45:49 PM »
An Englishman, an Irishman, a Welshman and a Scot are captured by the Iraqis.

The Iraq troop leader says, "we"re going to shoot you, but we will give you one last request." He says to the Welshman, "what"s your last request?"

The Welshman says, "I want a thousand Welshman singing "Land of my Fathers".

""Okay, you"ve got it. What about you?" he says to the Scotsman."

I want a thousand Scots pipers piping Scotland the brave," says the Scot.

"You"ve got it" says the Iraqi. "What"s your last request?" he says to the Irishman.

"I want a thousand Irishman doing the River-dance" says Paddy."

It"s yours" says the Iraqi. Turning to the Englishman, he says, "and your last request?"

The Englishman says, "f*cking shoot me first".

 lol: lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol: lol:
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 23711
  • Reputation: 0
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5838 on: April 05, 2020, 04:17:42 PM »
An Englishman, an Irishman, a Welshman and a Scot are captured by the Iraqis.

The Iraq troop leader says, "we"re going to shoot you, but we will give you one last request." He says to the Welshman, "what"s your last request?"

The Welshman says, "I want a thousand Welshman singing "Land of my Fathers".

""Okay, you"ve got it. What about you?" he says to the Scotsman."

I want a thousand Scots pipers piping Scotland the brave," says the Scot.

"You"ve got it" says the Iraqi. "What"s your last request?" he says to the Irishman.

"I want a thousand Irishman doing the River-dance" says Paddy."

It"s yours" says the Iraqi. Turning to the Englishman, he says, "and your last request?"

The Englishman says, "f*cking shoot me first".

 lol: lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol: lol: lol:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Steve

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 46427
  • Reputation: -3
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5839 on: April 06, 2020, 08:17:42 PM »
After just two weeks in lockdown I think I understand Osama Bin Laden.

5 Years, in the same house, with three wives?

He called in the Navy Seals himself.
Well, whatever nevermind

Online Barman

  • Administrator
  • Needs to get out more...
  • *****
  • Posts: 133675
  • Reputation: -49
  • Since 1960...
    • Virtual Pub!
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5840 on: April 07, 2020, 06:11:13 AM »
After just two weeks in lockdown I think I understand Osama Bin Laden.

5 Years, in the same house, with three wives?

He called in the Navy Seals himself.

 lol: lol: lol:

And no booze!  eeek:
Pro Skub  Thumbs:

Offline Darwins Selection

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 37184
  • Reputation: 6
  • I mostly despair
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5841 on: April 07, 2020, 08:56:33 AM »
After just two weeks in lockdown I think I understand Osama Bin Laden.

5 Years, in the same house, with three wives?

He called in the Navy Seals himself.

 lol: lol: lol:

And no booze!  eeek:
lol: lol: lol: lol:
I mostly despair

Online Nick

  • Needs to get out more...
  • ******
  • Posts: 100819
  • Reputation: -115
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5842 on: April 08, 2020, 11:01:06 AM »
Warning: May contain Skub
Cat sitter extraordinaire
Semi-professional crocodile

Offline Steve

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 46427
  • Reputation: -3
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5843 on: April 08, 2020, 11:26:07 AM »
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Steve

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 46427
  • Reputation: -3
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5844 on: April 08, 2020, 12:31:01 PM »
I’ve been a naughty girl… I think I deserve punishment…” my wife said suggestively, biting her lip.

“As you say,” said I and installed Windows Vista on her laptop.
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Steve

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 46427
  • Reputation: -3
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5845 on: April 11, 2020, 10:34:28 AM »
Yesterday I went to a barber’s shop for a shave.
The barber asked me to put a small wooden ball in my mouth so he could get a closer shave around my cheeks.
I asked: “But what if I swallow the ball?”
He replied: “No problem sir, you just bring it back tomorrow like everybody else.”
Well, whatever nevermind

Online Barman

  • Administrator
  • Needs to get out more...
  • *****
  • Posts: 133675
  • Reputation: -49
  • Since 1960...
    • Virtual Pub!
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5846 on: April 11, 2020, 10:53:35 AM »
Yesterday I went to a barber’s shop for a shave.
The barber asked me to put a small wooden ball in my mouth so he could get a closer shave around my cheeks.
I asked: “But what if I swallow the ball?”
He replied: “No problem sir, you just bring it back tomorrow like everybody else.”

 lol: lol: lol: sick2:
Pro Skub  Thumbs:

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 23711
  • Reputation: 0
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5847 on: April 11, 2020, 03:43:19 PM »
Yesterday I went to a barber’s shop for a shave.
The barber asked me to put a small wooden ball in my mouth so he could get a closer shave around my cheeks.
I asked: “But what if I swallow the ball?”
He replied: “No problem sir, you just bring it back tomorrow like everybody else.”

 lol: lol: lol: sick2:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Darwins Selection

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 37184
  • Reputation: 6
  • I mostly despair
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5848 on: April 12, 2020, 11:29:12 AM »
Yesterday I went to a barber’s shop for a shave.
The barber asked me to put a small wooden ball in my mouth so he could get a closer shave around my cheeks.
I asked: “But what if I swallow the ball?”
He replied: “No problem sir, you just bring it back tomorrow like everybody else.”

 lol: lol: lol: sick2:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol: lol: lol:
I mostly despair

Offline Steve

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 46427
  • Reputation: -3
Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5849 on: April 12, 2020, 02:04:22 PM »


Well, whatever nevermind