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Author Topic: Fresh from the Inbox  (Read 355340 times)

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Offline Just One More

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LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Online Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4996 on: April 18, 2019, 05:49:42 PM »
A tourist stopped at a local restaurant following a day roaming around in Mexico. While sipping his tequila, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful. He asked the waiter, "What is that you just served?"

The waiter replied, "Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are called Cojones de Toro, meaning testicles from the bull fight this morning - A delicacy!"

The man said, "What the heck, bring me an order."

The waiter replied, "I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy."

Early the next morning, the Canadian returned, placed his order, and that evening was served the one and only special delicacy of the day. After a few bites, inspecting his platter, he called to the waiter and said, "These are absolutely delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday.

The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Senor, sometimes the bull wins."
Well, whatever nevermind

Online Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4997 on: April 19, 2019, 02:34:46 PM »
A very nice, innocent Australian woman wants to get married, but she is only willing to marry a man if he has never had sex with another woman.
After several unsuccessful years of searching, she decides to take out a personal ad.
She ends up corresponding with Scotty Greer, who has lived his entire life in the Australian Outback and he has no experience with women. They meet and she is very happy with him; she feels that they are perfect for each other.
Eventually they end up getting married.

On their wedding night, she goes into the bathroom to prepare for the evening.
When she returns to the bedroom, she finds her new husband standing in the middle of the room, naked. All the furniture from the room is piled in one corner.

"What happened?" she asks.
"I've never been with a woman" he says...
"But if it's anything like a kangaroo, I'm gonna need all the room I can get!"
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Nick

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4998 on: April 19, 2019, 04:16:41 PM »
 happy001
Warning: May contain Skub
Cat sitter extraordinaire
Semi-professional crocodile

Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4999 on: April 19, 2019, 10:26:14 PM »




 redface:

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5000 on: April 20, 2019, 12:11:30 PM »
A tourist stopped at a local restaurant following a day roaming around in Mexico. While sipping his tequila, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful. He asked the waiter, "What is that you just served?"

The waiter replied, "Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are called Cojones de Toro, meaning testicles from the bull fight this morning - A delicacy!"

The man said, "What the heck, bring me an order."

The waiter replied, "I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy."

Early the next morning, the Canadian returned, placed his order, and that evening was served the one and only special delicacy of the day. After a few bites, inspecting his platter, he called to the waiter and said, "These are absolutely delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday.

The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Senor, sometimes the bull wins."

 lol: lol: lol:
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Online Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5001 on: April 20, 2019, 12:11:53 PM »
A very nice, innocent Australian woman wants to get married, but she is only willing to marry a man if he has never had sex with another woman.
After several unsuccessful years of searching, she decides to take out a personal ad.
She ends up corresponding with Scotty Greer, who has lived his entire life in the Australian Outback and he has no experience with women. They meet and she is very happy with him; she feels that they are perfect for each other.
Eventually they end up getting married.

On their wedding night, she goes into the bathroom to prepare for the evening.
When she returns to the bedroom, she finds her new husband standing in the middle of the room, naked. All the furniture from the room is piled in one corner.

"What happened?" she asks.
"I've never been with a woman" he says...
"But if it's anything like a kangaroo, I'm gonna need all the room I can get!"

 lol: lol: lol:
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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5002 on: April 20, 2019, 12:12:34 PM »
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Online Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5003 on: April 23, 2019, 05:28:50 PM »
A bloke walks into a pub and sees three men and a dog playing poker. He says to the landlord, "Feck me, that must be one clever dog." "Not really", said the landlord. "Every time he gets a good hand his bloody tail starts wagging!"
Well, whatever nevermind

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5004 on: April 24, 2019, 04:30:58 AM »
A bloke walks into a pub and sees three men and a dog playing poker. He says to the landlord, "Feck me, that must be one clever dog." "Not really", said the landlord. "Every time he gets a good hand his bloody tail starts wagging!"

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5005 on: April 26, 2019, 11:01:39 PM »
Wish me luck in the London Marathon on Sunday. Last year I managed 3 hours, 12 mins, 9 sec. This year I'm going to try and beat that but I usually get bored and turn the TV over.
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5006 on: April 26, 2019, 11:11:40 PM »


LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5007 on: April 26, 2019, 11:12:25 PM »

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #5008 on: April 27, 2019, 04:38:13 AM »
Wish me luck in the London Marathon on Sunday. Last year I managed 3 hours, 12 mins, 9 sec. This year I'm going to try and beat that but I usually get bored and turn the TV over.

happy001
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