Author Topic: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread  (Read 235853 times)

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Online Steve

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1830 on: November 08, 2019, 09:59:41 AM »
Lost property.

When the aircraft parks up for the night, the Cabin Crew is meant to check for lost property. In reality, they get off it ASAP as they are desperate to get in the sack with the Captain/F.O..

Hence our cleaners find lots of things that the crew should have removed and passed to the lost/found desk. In the past 2 shifts :-

MacBook Pro
Numerous Kindles
Numerous mobile phones
Numerous other tablet PCs
Wallets/purses (one tatty looking wallet had £580 in £20 notes - no cards or anything to identify the owner)
Numerous spectacles/sunglasses, not the cheap stuff either
Numerous passports (how do they manage to get out of the airport???)

On Wednesday night, an iPhone 11 Pro. My young colleagues told me that this is "a serious bit of kit". It was completely flat but we have a selection of charging cables available so I put it on charge and waited. About 40 minutes later, it started to ring. I answered it a very worried sounding lady started gibbering at me demanding to know who I was etc. I resisted the temptation to wind her up further and told her it was safe with me at LGW. She said she would return to LGW immediately to retrieve it and I said no problem, I'd leave it on charge until she arrived. An hour later it rang again and she informed me she was at the lost/found desk with her friend (whose phone she was using) so I left our office and walked the 5 minutes or so over to our desk. She immediately burst into tears - jeez you'd have thought I'd just donated a kidney the way she was blubbing. She then tried thrusting £20 into my hand, told her I couldn't accept and wished her a pleasant onward journey.

Sometimes, night shifts are nice  :thumbsup:

Also, easyJet gave us a surprise audit on our plane cleaning performance - its been 3 months since we took over - in the previous audit they gave the old company 56%. They gave us 91%  lol:  The bigwigs were most chuffed  :thumbsup:
Good man :thumbsup:
  :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
Well, whatever, nevermind

Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1831 on: November 08, 2019, 10:12:55 AM »
Do you take orders ?  rubschin:

It coming up to Christmas like  whistle:
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1832 on: November 09, 2019, 10:31:43 AM »
Airport status "Silver" due to anticipated XR protester activity. Shame I'm not there to introduce them to the gentle art of being clobbered round the chops with a 10kg aircraft chock...

Online Barman

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1833 on: November 09, 2019, 11:01:41 AM »
Airport status "Silver" due to anticipated XR protester activity. Shame I'm not there to introduce them to the gentle art of being clobbered round the chops with a 10kg aircraft chock...

Good job they weren't there when LL flew out on Thursday!  eveilgrin:
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1834 on: December 20, 2019, 01:39:26 PM »
'Twas the Friday before Christmas and all was...fucked...

I had an alert of specific flooding in the Gatwick area last night, so set off for work at 01.30 as opposed to the usual 03.00. Finally arrived at 06:30  ::) All around is flooded. A23, side-roads, the staff car parks, the railways, all under too much water for the auld Audi to sail across.

I should have 22 blokes this afternoon to chuck the bags, I have 9, the others have turned round and gone back home. On the plus side, many aircrews and passengers haven't managed to get in either so it balances out. Not many cancellations yet, but they will happen as crews that do make it in will be out of hours before the final wave gets off the ground.

Will this be another Christmas where the big Orange suddenly has 60+ flights rather than the usual 7? Don't know and don't care as I finish shift at 04:45 Christmas morning... razz:


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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1835 on: December 20, 2019, 01:54:36 PM »
'Twas the Friday before Christmas and all was...fucked...

I had an alert of specific flooding in the Gatwick area last night, so set off for work at 01.30 as opposed to the usual 03.00. Finally arrived at 06:30  ::) All around is flooded. A23, side-roads, the staff car parks, the railways, all under too much water for the auld Audi to sail across.

I should have 22 blokes this afternoon to chuck the bags, I have 9, the others have turned round and gone back home. On the plus side, many aircrews and passengers haven't managed to get in either so it balances out. Not many cancellations yet, but they will happen as crews that do make it in will be out of hours before the final wave gets off the ground.

Will this be another Christmas where the big Orange suddenly has 60+ flights rather than the usual 7? Don't know and don't care as I finish shift at 04:45 Christmas morning... razz:

Oh gawd!

Well done you for getting the day off tho!  :thumbsup:
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1836 on: December 20, 2019, 01:59:32 PM »
'Twas the Friday before Christmas and all was...fucked...

I had an alert of specific flooding in the Gatwick area last night, so set off for work at 01.30 as opposed to the usual 03.00. Finally arrived at 06:30  ::) All around is flooded. A23, side-roads, the staff car parks, the railways, all under too much water for the auld Audi to sail across.

I should have 22 blokes this afternoon to chuck the bags, I have 9, the others have turned round and gone back home. On the plus side, many aircrews and passengers haven't managed to get in either so it balances out. Not many cancellations yet, but they will happen as crews that do make it in will be out of hours before the final wave gets off the ground.

Will this be another Christmas where the big Orange suddenly has 60+ flights rather than the usual 7? Don't know and don't care as I finish shift at 04:45 Christmas morning... razz:

Oh gawd!

Well done you for getting the day off tho!  :thumbsup:

My contract states I work "hours as required" subject to 72 hours notice. There's still time...

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1837 on: December 20, 2019, 02:33:06 PM »
'Twas the Friday before Christmas and all was...fucked...

I had an alert of specific flooding in the Gatwick area last night, so set off for work at 01.30 as opposed to the usual 03.00. Finally arrived at 06:30  ::) All around is flooded. A23, side-roads, the staff car parks, the railways, all under too much water for the auld Audi to sail across.

I should have 22 blokes this afternoon to chuck the bags, I have 9, the others have turned round and gone back home. On the plus side, many aircrews and passengers haven't managed to get in either so it balances out. Not many cancellations yet, but they will happen as crews that do make it in will be out of hours before the final wave gets off the ground.

Will this be another Christmas where the big Orange suddenly has 60+ flights rather than the usual 7? Don't know and don't care as I finish shift at 04:45 Christmas morning... razz:

Oh gawd!

Well done you for getting the day off tho!  :thumbsup:

My contract states I work "hours as required" subject to 72 hours notice. There's still time...

Fingers crossed then! confused:
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1838 on: December 20, 2019, 02:41:59 PM »
'Twas the Friday before Christmas and all was...fucked...

I had an alert of specific flooding in the Gatwick area last night, so set off for work at 01.30 as opposed to the usual 03.00. Finally arrived at 06:30  ::) All around is flooded. A23, side-roads, the staff car parks, the railways, all under too much water for the auld Audi to sail across.

I should have 22 blokes this afternoon to chuck the bags, I have 9, the others have turned round and gone back home. On the plus side, many aircrews and passengers haven't managed to get in either so it balances out. Not many cancellations yet, but they will happen as crews that do make it in will be out of hours before the final wave gets off the ground.

Will this be another Christmas where the big Orange suddenly has 60+ flights rather than the usual 7? Don't know and don't care as I finish shift at 04:45 Christmas morning... razz:

Oh gawd!

Well done you for getting the day off tho!  :thumbsup:

My contract states I work "hours as required" subject to 72 hours notice. There's still time...

Fingers crossed then! confused:

Double time and time off in lieu... whistle:

Online Steve

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1839 on: December 20, 2019, 03:18:13 PM »
'Twas the Friday before Christmas and all was...fucked...

I had an alert of specific flooding in the Gatwick area last night, so set off for work at 01.30 as opposed to the usual 03.00. Finally arrived at 06:30  ::) All around is flooded. A23, side-roads, the staff car parks, the railways, all under too much water for the auld Audi to sail across.

I should have 22 blokes this afternoon to chuck the bags, I have 9, the others have turned round and gone back home. On the plus side, many aircrews and passengers haven't managed to get in either so it balances out. Not many cancellations yet, but they will happen as crews that do make it in will be out of hours before the final wave gets off the ground.

Will this be another Christmas where the big Orange suddenly has 60+ flights rather than the usual 7? Don't know and don't care as I finish shift at 04:45 Christmas morning... razz:

Oh gawd!

Well done you for getting the day off tho!  :thumbsup:

My contract states I work "hours as required" subject to 72 hours notice. There's still time...

Fingers crossed then! confused:

Double time and time off in lieu... whistle:
:thumbsup:

Isn't it amazing how passengers various, crew and your colleagues didn't think of setting off early when the forecast was there for all to view

Well I say 'amazing'. effin pathetic would be more like it
Well, whatever, nevermind

Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1840 on: December 21, 2019, 10:13:05 AM »
All looks set to continue - we do love a drama with the 'Christmas Getaway' theme   noooo:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1841 on: December 21, 2019, 07:51:36 PM »
'Twas the Friday before Christmas and all was...fucked...

I had an alert of specific flooding in the Gatwick area last night, so set off for work at 01.30 as opposed to the usual 03.00. Finally arrived at 06:30  ::) All around is flooded. A23, side-roads, the staff car parks, the railways, all under too much water for the auld Audi to sail across.

I should have 22 blokes this afternoon to chuck the bags, I have 9, the others have turned round and gone back home. On the plus side, many aircrews and passengers haven't managed to get in either so it balances out. Not many cancellations yet, but they will happen as crews that do make it in will be out of hours before the final wave gets off the ground.

Will this be another Christmas where the big Orange suddenly has 60+ flights rather than the usual 7? Don't know and don't care as I finish shift at 04:45 Christmas morning... razz:

Oh gawd!

Well done you for getting the day off tho!  :thumbsup:

My contract states I work "hours as required" subject to 72 hours notice. There's still time...

Fingers crossed then! confused:

Double time and time off in lieu... whistle:

Bad cooking ...... rubschin:

Online Grumpmeister

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1842 on: January 10, 2020, 07:04:17 PM »
Well that's Miss D put off flying for life...  noooo:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-51058929
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Online Steve

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1843 on: January 10, 2020, 07:58:51 PM »
Well, whatever, nevermind

Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread
« Reply #1844 on: January 11, 2020, 08:19:51 AM »
14 months ago, when the Lion Air 737 Max crashed, the various airline forums I frequent wen into overdrive. Several of the contributors are vastly experienced in all aviation matters and they all concluded that the Max was a very poorly designed aircraft.

The MCAS kludge was put in to satisfy the airlines that insisted the new plane would not require extensive SIM training and could ber flown on their existing type rating. Southwest Airlines ordered 280 aircraft with $1 million refundable on each if SIM training was required. The new CFM Leap -1B engines had to be pushed too far forward and too high up (due to short landing gear) creating a fundamentally unstable aircraft. The 737 had been a step too far - it's a 60 year old design and even the more recent versions (737 NGs - like Ryanair, TUI, Jet2 use) were only certified due to "grandfathering rights" where old designs are approved as they have a track record of safety.

A new aircraft would not be approved with some of the 737NG designs - control cables too close together, fuel systems too close together, no overwing escape slides etc.

But Boeing, under pressure from the airlines, had little choice - they didn't have time for a "clean sheet" design new narrow body as Airbus was cleaning up with the A320NEO series and they had to get a product to market quicker. Thus was born the Max. Boeing then compounded their problems by being economical with the truth to the Federal Aviation Authority and even omitting to mention the MCAS system when it was first released. They only mentioned it to airlines after Lion Air. It should have been grounded there and then but they gambled and we then had the Ethiopian crash.

Boeing are in a bad way.

And the media still hasn't mentioned the Dreamliners having their lightning protection in the CFRP wings removed yet...without informing the FAA... eeek: