Secret Santa

[Miss Demeanour]

Jeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzz ...how difficult can this be?

This has been delegated to members of the team this year. Normally we select a person from the  names in the hat lucky draw and buy a Secret Santa pressy for about the value of £5 to be given out at the Christmas dinner.

This year they decided they wanted to do something different.  We had voting options   . Choices were between things like giving something recycled  or homemade or something you got for free . Anyway it was decided we would go for a simple just buy a gift for a man or woman , no value limit and as you don't know who is going to pick it out then the risk of offending anybody is eliminated  

However things have now got sooo frickin complicated with the organiser stating presents had to be wrapped in blue or pink , and people then saying they might pick the one that they have bought etc etc etc....

So this morning I have had to intervene and sent this to all  ..

Without wishing to interfere in matters of national importance I aim to clarify the Secret Santa arrangements.
It’s not that difficult   - I guarantee!!!!!

Step 1 – Wrap your wonderful , well thought out and very expensive present in whatever wrapping of your choice.
Step 2 – Place a label or marking on the present that declares if it is for a male or a female. For the truly lazy a simple F or M should do . That is F & M !!!
Step 3 – There will be 2 bags for the collection of Secret Santa presents ...place your present in the appropriate bag. For clarification ...man present in man bag / girly present in girly bag
Step 4 – Walk away slowly ensuring no one can see what you dropped in bag and your risk of being sued in future will be reduced
Step 5 – When choosing your present on the day , you can look in the bag and you should hopefully know what the present you bought looks like when YOU ( not your partner/ personal shopper or child) wrapped it up . Top Tip – avoid selecting the present you bought ( unless you secretly wanted it !!! )
Step 6 – Have a drink before opening it

Hope that sorts it all out now  - any questions please find a Elf who may be able to assist because I have become The Grinch !!!

How much more confusion do you possibly think this could cause ???  

[Barman]

Oh dear... 

[Barman]

Perhaps you could organise the pub secret santa? 

[Miss Demeanour]

We would obviously need guidance on the rules and regulations 

[Barman]

We would obviously need guidance on the rules and regulations 

Off you go then... 

[Snoopy]

I am not ~ repeat NOT ~ sitting on Nick's lap to get a present.  
He is a self confessed knob twiddler and producer of unwarranted quantities of "bubbles in the bath"!

[Miss Demeanour]

I think you lot might be even more difficult than my lot and that is saying something 

[Barman]

I think you lot might be even more difficult than my lot and that is saying something 

 

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

I think you lot might be even more difficult than my lot and that is saying something 

Indeed it is Miss D but quite what we do not know.

[Miss Demeanour]

Miss D's Virtual Secret Santa scheme......you all think of something you want to buy me and I accept these generous tokens of your affection without protesting too much 

[Snoopy]

I think you lot might be even more difficult than my lot and that is saying something 

Just to cheer up Miss Grumpyboots.

A virtual pressy.



Clicky and it goes all big and sparkly.

[Barman]

Miss D's Virtual Secret Santa scheme......you all think of something you want to buy me and I accept these generous tokens of your affection without protesting too much  

 

And next year it will be my turn like? 

[Miss Demeanour]

Oooohhhhhh so it does  

Gorgeous ...you are my new bestest friend  

( I will prolly have to pay copyright charges for that   )

[Miss Demeanour]

Reply to my original email from the eccentric one  

Hi Miss D  and all those approaching the Outer Limits,
Can I be confident that this procedure will be placed within the shared drive under our procedures and policies for all future reference and scrutiny ?
Moi facetious!

Facetious A word noted as having all vowels in order as  abstemious.

Ciao ciao

Note to Peter  I will get such grief !

[Barman]

Too much time on his hands that one... far too much...