Author Topic: Fresh from the Inbox  (Read 732289 times)

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Offline Pirate

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #150 on: November 11, 2010, 09:32:52 PM »
.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1dCcCdzeJo


Oh this had us laughing at work yesterday.  ;D

Was that on your site? Is that your handbag?... eeek:

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #151 on: November 12, 2010, 05:52:35 AM »
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #152 on: November 12, 2010, 08:18:39 AM »
.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1dCcCdzeJo


Oh this had us laughing at work yesterday.  ;D

Was that on your site? Is that your handbag?... eeek:


Was that your truncheon?
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Nick

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #153 on: November 12, 2010, 08:38:45 AM »
A man and woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant.  They were gazing lovingly at each other and holding hands.  Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps away, suddenly noticed the man slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, but the woman acted unconcerned.
 
The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table.   Still, the woman appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware her dining companion had disappeared.    The waitress went over to the table and said to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table.
 
The woman calmly looked up at her and said, "No, he didn't.   He just walked in."
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Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #154 on: November 13, 2010, 06:57:05 AM »
A man and woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant.  They were gazing lovingly at each other and holding hands.  Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps away, suddenly noticed the man slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, but the woman acted unconcerned.
 
The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table.   Still, the woman appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware her dining companion had disappeared.    The waitress went over to the table and said to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table.
 
The woman calmly looked up at her and said, "No, he didn't.   He just walked in."


 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Baldy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #155 on: November 14, 2010, 09:33:15 AM »
A dog lover, whose dog was a female and "in heat', agreed to look after

And  house her neighbor's male dog while they were away on holiday. 

 

She had a  large house and believed that she could keep them apart,

But as she was drifting off to sleep she heard awful howling and

Moaning sounds.  She rushed downstair found the dogs locked together,

In obvious pain and unable to disengage, as so frequently happens

When they mate.
 
 Unable to separate them and perplexed as to what to do next,

She called the vet, although it was  late.  The vet answered in a very

Grumpy voice. Having explained the problem to him, the vet said.

 "Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs.

 I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing will make

the male lose his erection and be able to withdraw."
 
 "Do you think that will work?" she asked.
 
 "It just worked for me" he replied.


Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #156 on: November 14, 2010, 11:42:50 AM »
AFFS!
I mostly despair

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #157 on: November 14, 2010, 11:46:43 AM »
 ;D
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #158 on: November 15, 2010, 11:26:04 PM »
Indian builder killed in roof collapse during the construction of the stage for Lionel Richie........


                                                                                                                                                                                                          The site foreman said "the last thing I saw was Dan Singh on the ceiling"....

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #159 on: November 16, 2010, 06:09:57 AM »
Indian builder killed in roof collapse during the construction of the stage for Lionel Richie........


                                                                                                                                                                                                          The site foreman said "the last thing I saw was Dan Singh on the ceiling"....

Oh dear...  noooo:
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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #160 on: November 16, 2010, 01:09:22 PM »
Indian builder killed in roof collapse during the construction of the stage for Lionel Richie........

Sounds more like a cowboy builder.
I mostly despair

Offline Tipsy Gipsy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #161 on: November 17, 2010, 11:37:34 PM »
Hello Mate.  Just a quick one... I've been offered 8 legs of venison for £40.  Is that too dear?
It's better than I ever even knew.  They say that the world was built for two.  Only worth living if somebody is loving you.  Baby now you do.

Offline Tipsy Gipsy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #162 on: November 17, 2010, 11:40:52 PM »
You wont hear from me for a while, mate. Being investigated for stealing swimming pool inflatables.... I gotta lilo.
It's better than I ever even knew.  They say that the world was built for two.  Only worth living if somebody is loving you.  Baby now you do.

Offline Baldy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #163 on: November 18, 2010, 12:43:10 AM »
An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time.

Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married.

Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on.

Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship.

'How do you feel about sex?' he asked, rather tentatively.

'I would like it infrequently' she replied.

The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, adjusted his glasses, leaned over towards her and whispered,
 

 

'Is that one word or two?
 


Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #164 on: November 18, 2010, 07:33:40 AM »
 ;D
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