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Author Topic: Fresh from the Inbox  (Read 732704 times)

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Offline Snoopy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #660 on: May 16, 2011, 06:58:43 PM »
C & W = shite.

Not for nothing do our cousins across the pond call it "Shit Kickin' Music".  razz:
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #661 on: May 16, 2011, 07:04:54 PM »
C & W = shite.

Not for nothing do our cousins across the pond call it "Shit Kickin' Music".  razz:

I'd rather kick shit....  lol:

One of my suppliers in Denver took me out one night... to a C & W thing - wot a nightmare - all dressed up as cowboys and line dancing and stuff....  noooo:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #662 on: May 16, 2011, 07:14:17 PM »
C & W = shite.

Not for nothing do our cousins across the pond call it "Shit Kickin' Music".  razz:

I'd rather kick shit....  lol:

One of my suppliers in Denver took me out one night... to a C & W thing - wot a nightmare - all dressed up as cowboys and line dancing and stuff....  noooo:

Jeans and a belt....... rubschin:

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #663 on: May 16, 2011, 07:18:28 PM »
C & W = shite.

Not for nothing do our cousins across the pond call it "Shit Kickin' Music".  razz:

I'd rather kick shit....  lol:

One of my suppliers in Denver took me out one night... to a C & W thing - wot a nightmare - all dressed up as cowboys and line dancing and stuff....  noooo:

Jeans and a belt....... rubschin:

doh:
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Offline Baldy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #664 on: May 16, 2011, 07:39:19 PM »
C & W = shite.

Not for nothing do our cousins across the pond call it "Shit Kickin' Music".  razz:

I'd rather kick shit....  lol:

One of my suppliers in Denver took me out one night... to a C & W thing - wot a nightmare - all dressed up as cowboys and line dancing and stuff....  noooo:

Jeans and a belt....... rubschin:

doh:

 lol: lol: lol:

Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #665 on: May 16, 2011, 07:56:21 PM »
Ryanair have charged Jennifer Mills-Westley's family £65 in excess baggage fees to bring her remains back to the UK.



I suppose that's what you get for not booking ahead.............

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #666 on: May 16, 2011, 07:57:21 PM »
Ryanair have charged Jennifer Mills-Westley's family £65 in excess baggage fees to bring her remains back to the UK.



I suppose that's what you get for not booking ahead.............

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Baldy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #667 on: May 16, 2011, 07:58:46 PM »
I thought her name was Edna Moore.  whistle:

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #668 on: May 16, 2011, 07:59:50 PM »
I thought her name was Edna Moore.  whistle:

happy001
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Offline Baldy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #669 on: May 16, 2011, 08:11:35 PM »
Getting Home Safe





      A new way to avoid any alcohol issues while driving:   Went out with some friends last night and tied one on. Knowing that I was wasted, I did something that I have never done before. I took a bus home.  I arrived home safe and warm, which seemed really surprising as I have never driven a bus before.

Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #670 on: May 16, 2011, 08:14:32 PM »
Getting Home Safe





      A new way to avoid any alcohol issues while driving:   Went out with some friends last night and tied one on. Knowing that I was wasted, I did something that I have never done before. I took a bus home.  I arrived home safe and warm, which seemed really surprising as I have never driven a bus before.

Is that a true story ......... rubschin:

Offline Baldy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #671 on: May 16, 2011, 08:17:42 PM »
Getting Home Safe





      A new way to avoid any alcohol issues while driving:   Went out with some friends last night and tied one on. Knowing that I was wasted, I did something that I have never done before. I took a bus home.  I arrived home safe and warm, which seemed really surprising as I have never driven a bus before.

Is that a true story ......... rubschin:

No just a bit of info I thought you might find helpfull.  ;)

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #672 on: May 17, 2011, 06:48:11 AM »
Getting Home Safe





      A new way to avoid any alcohol issues while driving:   Went out with some friends last night and tied one on. Knowing that I was wasted, I did something that I have never done before. I took a bus home.  I arrived home safe and warm, which seemed really surprising as I have never driven a bus before.

 drumroll:

I want to die in my sleep like my dad...

...not screaming in fear like the passengers on his bus...

etc.
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Offline Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #673 on: May 17, 2011, 05:34:25 PM »
The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman. And she was somewhat upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'

And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love so at least I can tell you what happened..'
'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'

And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenceless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days. So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the same.'

The husband took a quick breath and continued - 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, 'Please ... Do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'


 
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #674 on: May 17, 2011, 06:19:37 PM »
The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman. And she was somewhat upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'

And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love so at least I can tell you what happened..'
'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'

And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenceless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days. So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the same.'

The husband took a quick breath and continued - 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, 'Please ... Do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'


 


 lol: lol: lol:

He didn't give her the vacuum cleaner did he...?  noooo:
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