Author Topic: Fresh from the Inbox  (Read 439329 times)

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Offline Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6105 on: July 04, 2020, 03:28:59 PM »
Irish mixed grill:
New potatoes, roast potatoes, boiled potatoes, mashed potatoes,
waffles and hash browns with chips.

 lol: lol: lol:

Get your Jacket....... noooo:

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LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6106 on: July 04, 2020, 06:58:39 PM »
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Darwins Selection

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Offline Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6108 on: July 05, 2020, 10:32:18 AM »
Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. 
At a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took Dr. Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of him.
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6109 on: July 05, 2020, 11:44:45 AM »
Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. 
At a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took Dr. Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of him.

 ;D
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Offline miss Tchevious

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6110 on: July 05, 2020, 12:02:25 PM »
Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. 
At a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took Dr. Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of him.

 ;D

 ;D ;D

Offline Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6111 on: July 05, 2020, 01:09:20 PM »
Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. 
At a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took Dr. Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of him.

 ;D

 ;D ;D

 ;D ;D ;D
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6112 on: July 06, 2020, 11:00:51 AM »
Heisenberg, Schroedinger and Ohm are in a car...


... And they get pulled over. 
Heisenberg is driving and the cop asks him "Do you know how fast you were going?"
"No, but I know exactly where I am" Heisenberg replies.
The cop says "You were doing 55 in a 35." Heisenberg throws up his hands and shouts "Great! Now I'm lost!"
The cop thinks this is suspicious and orders him to pop open the trunk. 
He checks it out and says "Do you know you have a dead cat back here?"
"We do now, asshole!" shouts Schroedinger.
The cop moves to arrest them.
Ohm resists
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6113 on: July 06, 2020, 11:05:56 AM »
Heisenberg, Schroedinger and Ohm are in a car...


... And they get pulled over.
Heisenberg is driving and the cop asks him "Do you know how fast you were going?"
"No, but I know exactly where I am" Heisenberg replies.
The cop says "You were doing 55 in a 35." Heisenberg throws up his hands and shouts "Great! Now I'm lost!"
The cop thinks this is suspicious and orders him to pop open the trunk.
He checks it out and says "Do you know you have a dead cat back here?"
"We do now, asshole!" shouts Schroedinger.
The cop moves to arrest them.
Ohm resists

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6114 on: July 07, 2020, 10:13:51 AM »
It was the first day of a school in the USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?"

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up:? "Patrick Henry, 1775" he said.

"Very good! Who said, Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?''

Again, there was no response except for Chandrasekhar. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said Chandrasekhar.

The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about our history than you do."

She heard a loud whisper: "Fuck the Indians,"

"Who said that?" she demanded.

Chandrasekhar put his hand up. "General Custer, 1876."
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6115 on: July 07, 2020, 11:10:48 AM »
It was the first day of a school in the USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?"

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up:? "Patrick Henry, 1775" he said.

"Very good! Who said, Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?''

Again, there was no response except for Chandrasekhar. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said Chandrasekhar.

The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about our history than you do."

She heard a loud whisper: "Fuck the Indians,"

"Who said that?" she demanded.

Chandrasekhar put his hand up. "General Custer, 1876."
lol: lol:
I mostly despair

Offline Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6116 on: July 07, 2020, 07:00:21 PM »
It was the first day of a school in the USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?"

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up:? "Patrick Henry, 1775" he said.

"Very good! Who said, Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?''

Again, there was no response except for Chandrasekhar. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said Chandrasekhar.

The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about our history than you do."

She heard a loud whisper: "Fuck the Indians,"

"Who said that?" she demanded.

Chandrasekhar put his hand up. "General Custer, 1876."
lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline miss Tchevious

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6117 on: July 11, 2020, 10:58:53 AM »
I treasured my ex girlfriend...............




You'll need a map and a fucking shovel to find her........... whistle:

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6118 on: July 11, 2020, 11:32:19 AM »
I treasured my ex girlfriend...............




You'll need a map and a fucking shovel to find her........... whistle:

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #6119 on: July 11, 2020, 07:48:16 PM »
A blind Pilot walks into the plane waiving his walking stick....
Passengers, All look at each other in disbelief.
Flight Attendant, gets on the PA and announces , "Ladies and Gentlemen as you can see the captain is legally blind, but I assure you he is one of the best pilots with over 6,000 successful flights."
Next the Co-Pilot makes his way to the plane and he also is blind and uses his walking stick to make it to the cabin. The passengers seem very concerned at this point.
The Flight Attendant again takes the PA and announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen as you all saw the Co Pilot is also blind but rest assured you are in the hands of the second best pilot as he has over 5,000 successful flights."
At this point the plane begins to take off from the runway, as it gains speed the passengers grow tenser. The plane accelerates more and more approaching the end of the runway and still has not taken off.... faster and faster..still on the ground, as its almost to the end the passengers look on until eventually the Passengers scream.."OMG WE ARE GOING TO DIE!!!!!!!!" ..., then suddenly the plane lifts off the tarmac and begins its ascent.
At this point the Pilot turns to the Co-Pilot and says, "Holy Crap, the day these fuckers stop screaming we're fucked!!!"
Well, whatever nevermind