Tales of the river bank: Nick's all new 2025 lock-keeping adventures thread

[Barman]

Big fight between anglers and boaters 

Called police.

Another lock keeper was threatened with death the other day because a boater couldn’t get into the toilets!!

It’s getting a bit crazy.

It's all kicking off! 

[Nick]

Angling bailiff was summoned. Those guys DO NOT MESS ABOUT. Anglers licences revoked and escorted from site

[Steve]

Angling bailiff was summoned. Those guys DO NOT MESS ABOUT. Anglers licences revoked and escorted from site

[Nick]

Rubber duck race today 

[Steve]

Rubber duck race today 

  careful how you say it

[Nick]

I approve of the Duke of Edinburgh award scheme. It gets kids out and about,

But 80 canoes coming in groups of 6 at 15 minute intervals is a tad much.

But Burton on Trent to Newark with overnight camping and cooking on a primus is impressive 

[apc2010]

I approve of the Duke of Edinburgh award scheme. It gets kids out and about,

But 80 canoes coming in groups of 6 at 15 minute intervals is a tad much.

But Burton on Trent to Newark with overnight camping and cooking on a primus is impressive 

     Better than street corner and bottle of cider …!..

[Nick]

The voice of experience?

[Steve]

I approve of the Duke of Edinburgh award scheme. It gets kids out and about,

But 80 canoes coming in groups of 6 at 15 minute intervals is a tad much.

But Burton on Trent to Newark with overnight camping and cooking on a primus is impressive 

Maybe you should have worn a Gary Glitter T shirt

[apc2010]

The voice of experience?

   With 10 silk cut between us …

[apc2010]

The voice of experience?

   With 10 silk cut between us …

I was more in to playing football though ..walking from park to park looking for a game …

[Nick]

Second time I’ve had this one

Blonde: I can see people on the other side of the river. Who are they and how did they get there?
Me: It’s Nottinghamshire. They live there.
Blonde: looks puzzled
Me: if you keep going that way you get to London, France, Spain and then Africa.
Blonde: But how did they get there?
Me: There are bridges

She looked sceptical

[Barman]

Second time I’ve had this one

Blonde: I can see people on the other side of the river. Who are they and how did they get there?
Me: It’s Nottinghamshire. They live there.
Blonde: looks puzzled
Me: if you keep going that way you get to London, France, Spain and then Africa.
Blonde: But how did they get there?
Me: There are bridges

She looked sceptical

 

[Steve]

Second time I’ve had this one

Blonde: I can see people on the other side of the river. Who are they and how did they get there?
Me: It’s Nottinghamshire. They live there.
Blonde: looks puzzled
Me: if you keep going that way you get to London, France, Spain and then Africa.
Blonde: But how did they get there?
Me: There are bridges

She looked sceptical

 

[Nick]

You know about the sandbar as you approach the lock?

Oh yes, know to avoid that!

Good. The last boat that ran aground was there for two days!

We aren’t daft!

Good




OOPS