Thanks for the kind words everyone.
It has indeed been possibly one of the most trying shocking and distressing few days of all time for me tbqh.

I'm still sort of in a state of shock, as is his mother.

We are both blaming ourselves (which is wrong to a certain degree, I know, but you just can't help it) and asking where exactly did we go so badly wrong.

I know the dog has mentioned many tiimes that you have to let your kids get on with life, but when you see one of them commiting such dreadful acts of self destruction, it's very hard to know wheather to leave them to it or try and help.
All not helped now by me and Mrs G#1 having a gagging order placed upon us by the very person that alerted us to some/all the dreadful and almost unbelievable problems, some just too far unsavoury to discuss in here I'm afraid.
This has only made matters worse for us both now, as the planned 'discussions' with him today have now been postponed until she finally leaves him...IF that actually happens, which if she was my daughter, it would most definately.
I just sincerely hope he doesn't contact me in the meantime, as i REALLY REALLY will not be able to hold a reasonable conversation with him.
He doesn't know what i know btw.