The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Snoopy on May 16, 2011, 09:17:35 PM

Title: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 16, 2011, 09:17:35 PM
We last debated "Chat-up Lines"

So come on chaps ~ what is/was your most successful?

And for the chapesses ~ what would work for you?


And I expect a better standard than "Get yer coat girl .... You've pulled!"
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: apc2010 on May 16, 2011, 09:21:58 PM
As a man in a relationship I would not know ........... surrender:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 16, 2011, 09:23:51 PM
As a wumman not in a relationship I would not know  surrender:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Pirate on May 16, 2011, 09:24:11 PM
I was in a crowded pub once. A pretty girl with fabulous eyes and nice belly button came in, obviously looking for someone. She was stretching and craning her neck around the crowd trying to locate someone...I said 'Here I am...'

It worked... 8)
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Just One More on May 16, 2011, 09:25:49 PM
"I'm the one your mother warned you about" ... never fails to raise a smile
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: apc2010 on May 16, 2011, 09:26:44 PM
Yeah I woz lying ............ lol:

Which explains why I am not married .........( yet ..Miss D .... eyes:)
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 16, 2011, 09:29:04 PM
Oh ...is it planned though ... Popcorn:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 16, 2011, 09:30:24 PM
I once tried the "Do you sleep on your stomach?" line on a girl.
She said "No" so I came back with "In that case may I?"

She got quite huffy about it but every time I saw her afterwards she giggled and a month later I did.
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: apc2010 on May 16, 2011, 09:33:43 PM
I once tried the "Do you sleep on your stomach?" line on a girl.
She said "No" so I came back with "In that case may I?"

She got quite huffy about it but every time I saw her afterwards she giggled and a month later I did.

You slept on your stomach .......... rubschin:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 16, 2011, 09:36:26 PM
I once tried the "Do you sleep on your stomach?" line on a girl.
She said "No" so I came back with "In that case may I?"

She got quite huffy about it but every time I saw her afterwards she giggled and a month later I did.

You slept on your stomach .......... rubschin:


doh: No! Hers you dolt!!
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Pirate on May 16, 2011, 09:37:38 PM
I was in a queue to get in a club once. Saw a pretty girl in the queue and said 'Fancy a dance later when we get in' she said 'No chance'

I said 'Oh...I suppose a fuck's completely out the question then'   razz:

Made everyone laugh...

Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 16, 2011, 09:47:29 PM
So has a wumman ever chatted you up and how did that go ???

Not looking for hints or anyfink - I would never have the nerve even if I thought someone was drop dead gorgeous  redface:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: apc2010 on May 16, 2011, 09:50:04 PM
So has a wumman ever chatted you up and how did that go ???

Not looking for hints or anyfink - I would never have the nerve even if I thought someone was drop dead gorgeous  redface:

Thank you ..... lol: BM been talking........ eyes:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Pirate on May 16, 2011, 09:51:47 PM
So has a wumman ever chatted you up and how did that go ???

Not looking for hints or anyfink - I would never have the nerve even if I thought someone was drop dead gorgeous  redface:



Thank you ..... lol: BM been talking........ eyes:

In his sleep... whistle:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 16, 2011, 09:51:58 PM
 lol: lol: lol:

Oh noes ...BM can't remember a thing from your meet ....I have tried to prise the details ...like who was there  lol:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 16, 2011, 09:53:52 PM
I think you are buggered there Miss D, apparently his bucket was on back to front  whistle:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: apc2010 on May 16, 2011, 09:54:14 PM
lol: lol: lol:

Oh noes ...BM can't remember a thing from your meet ....I have tried to prise the details ...like who was there  lol:

Lightweight............. noooo:....
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Baldy on May 16, 2011, 09:55:30 PM
lol: lol: lol:

Oh noes ...BM can't remember a thing from your meet ....I have tried to prise the details ...like who was there  lol:

Nor can we.
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 16, 2011, 09:55:46 PM
So has a wumman ever chatted you up and how did that go ???

Not looking for hints or anyfink - I would never have the nerve even if I thought someone was drop dead gorgeous  redface:

SWWLTBO was working for the same company as me. She knew my marriage was going tits up and she was very helpful in covering my absences from night shifts while I went home and made sure the kids were OK after Mrs S#1 moved out.
When things had settled down I suggested I should take her to dinner as a thankyou. That was honestly my sole intent. Feelings far too raw to be looking for anything or anyone else.
Anywhoo she lived in London and worked in the London office and I lived and worked in Milton Keynes. She agreed to go out for dinner and when I dropped her back home she invited me up to her flat for a coffee. I really had every intention of driving back to MK but we sat talking until gone midnight and then she said "You've got three choices. Drive home, sleep on the settee here or sleep with me ...... Up to you".


She pulled!
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Pirate on May 16, 2011, 09:55:54 PM
I think you are buggered there Miss D

 shutup: shutup:

Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 16, 2011, 09:56:06 PM
lol: lol: lol:

Oh noes ...BM can't remember a thing from your meet ....I have tried to prise the details ...like who was there  lol:

Lightweight............. noooo:....

It's probably the age difference  lol:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: apc2010 on May 16, 2011, 09:58:20 PM
lol: lol: lol:

Oh noes ...BM can't remember a thing from your meet ....I have tried to prise the details ...like who was there  lol:

Nor can we.

I had to work after ...... cussing:............till 12.......
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 16, 2011, 09:58:44 PM
So has a wumman ever chatted you up and how did that go ???

Not looking for hints or anyfink - I would never have the nerve even if I thought someone was drop dead gorgeous  redface:

SWWLTBO was working for the same company as me. She knew my marriage was going tits up and she was very helpful in covering my absences from night shifts while I went home and made sure the kids were OK after Mrs S#1 moved out.
When things had settled down I suggested I should take her to dinner as a thankyou. That was honestly my sole intent. Feelings far too raw to be looking for anything or anyone else.
Anywhoo she lived in London and worked in the London office and I lived and worked in Milton Keynes. She agreed to go out for dinner and when I dropped her back home she invited me up to her flat for a coffee. I really had every intention of driving back to MK but we sat talking until gone midnight and then she said "You've got three choices. Drive home, sleep on the settee here or sleep with me ...... Up to you".


She pulled!

Hook, line  and sinker  noooo:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 16, 2011, 10:00:52 PM
So has a wumman ever chatted you up and how did that go ???

Not looking for hints or anyfink - I would never have the nerve even if I thought someone was drop dead gorgeous  redface:

SWWLTBO was working for the same company as me. She knew my marriage was going tits up and she was very helpful in covering my absences from night shifts while I went home and made sure the kids were OK after Mrs S#1 moved out.
When things had settled down I suggested I should take her to dinner as a thankyou. That was honestly my sole intent. Feelings far too raw to be looking for anything or anyone else.
Anywhoo she lived in London and worked in the London office and I lived and worked in Milton Keynes. She agreed to go out for dinner and when I dropped her back home she invited me up to her flat for a coffee. I really had every intention of driving back to MK but we sat talking until gone midnight and then she said "You've got three choices. Drive home, sleep on the settee here or sleep with me ...... Up to you".


She pulled!

Hook, line  and sinker  noooo:

Indeed but I honestly haven't regretted it. Been together for 26 years now.
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 16, 2011, 10:02:06 PM
I think you are buggered there Miss D

 shutup: shutup:



That's illegal in many countries  ...you would know though eh  ;)
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: apc2010 on May 16, 2011, 10:03:27 PM
So has a wumman ever chatted you up and how did that go ???

Not looking for hints or anyfink - I would never have the nerve even if I thought someone was drop dead gorgeous  redface:

SWWLTBO was working for the same company as me. She knew my marriage was going tits up and she was very helpful in covering my absences from night shifts while I went home and made sure the kids were OK after Mrs S#1 moved out.
When things had settled down I suggested I should take her to dinner as a thankyou. That was honestly my sole intent. Feelings far too raw to be looking for anything or anyone else.
Anywhoo she lived in London and worked in the London office and I lived and worked in Milton Keynes. She agreed to go out for dinner and when I dropped her back home she invited me up to her flat for a coffee. I really had every intention of driving back to MK but we sat talking until gone midnight and then she said "You've got three choices. Drive home, sleep on the settee here or sleep with me ...... Up to you".


She pulled!

Hook, line  and sinker  noooo:

Indeed but I honestly haven't regretted it. Been together for 26 years now.


Parole ........ rubschin:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 16, 2011, 10:06:17 PM
So has a wumman ever chatted you up and how did that go ???

Not looking for hints or anyfink - I would never have the nerve even if I thought someone was drop dead gorgeous  redface:

SWWLTBO was working for the same company as me. She knew my marriage was going tits up and she was very helpful in covering my absences from night shifts while I went home and made sure the kids were OK after Mrs S#1 moved out.
When things had settled down I suggested I should take her to dinner as a thankyou. That was honestly my sole intent. Feelings far too raw to be looking for anything or anyone else.
Anywhoo she lived in London and worked in the London office and I lived and worked in Milton Keynes. She agreed to go out for dinner and when I dropped her back home she invited me up to her flat for a coffee. I really had every intention of driving back to MK but we sat talking until gone midnight and then she said "You've got three choices. Drive home, sleep on the settee here or sleep with me ...... Up to you".


She pulled!

Hook, line  and sinker  noooo:

Indeed but I honestly haven't regretted it. Been together for 26 years now.


Parole ........ rubschin:

Nah! She's not the 26 yo London Party Girl she was but she still keeps me happy, makes me laugh and never, ever says no.
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 16, 2011, 10:08:17 PM
Perhaps she doesn't have any need to anymore  ;)
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Nick on May 17, 2011, 06:22:08 AM
This reminds me I spent the night picking up women at parties, but I can't recall anything much about it. TRhere seemed to be some laydee NIgerian archaeologists involved too  rubschin:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 17, 2011, 06:24:56 AM
Had they been dead for about a thousand years ?
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Barman on May 17, 2011, 06:42:58 AM
I got away with "If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?" one night... She hadn't heard the song luckily....  whistle:

Mind you, she was a nurse... I needn't have used so many werds problee....  redface:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 17, 2011, 06:44:27 AM
Perhaps she doesn't have any need to anymore  ;)



Well perhaps the question isn't asked as often  surrender:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Pirate on May 17, 2011, 07:22:40 AM
This reminds me I spent the night picking up women at parties, but I can't recall anything much about it. TRhere seemed to be some laydee NIgerian archaeologists involved too  rubschin:

Shouldn't this be in the dreams thread?
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 17, 2011, 08:10:14 AM
I got away with "If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?" one night... She hadn't heard the song luckily....  whistle:

Mind you, she was a nurse... I needn't have used so many werds problee....  redface:

Geriatric nurse attending to your needs was she  whistle:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 17, 2011, 08:13:01 AM
I got away with "If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?" one night... She hadn't heard the song luckily....  whistle:

Mind you, she was a nurse... I needn't have used so many werds problee....  redface:

Geriatric nurse attending to your needs was she  whistle:


See you've sharpened your axe  ;)
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 17, 2011, 08:18:45 AM
I should be nicer shouldn't I  redface: redface: redface:

How about a sponsored Miss D to be nice to everyone - no sarcasm allowed day ???
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 17, 2011, 08:23:14 AM
Oh Noes ~ That would be asking waaaaaaaay too much.  noooo:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Miss Demeanour on May 17, 2011, 08:29:38 AM
Small steps then .... rubschin:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Snoopy on May 17, 2011, 08:34:34 AM
In that skirt? I would recommend very small steps.  whistle:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Barman on May 17, 2011, 10:32:15 AM
I got away with "If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?" one night... She hadn't heard the song luckily....  whistle:

Mind you, she was a nurse... I needn't have used so many werds problee....  redface:

Geriatric nurse attending to your needs was she  whistle:

Well, she certainly attended to my needs....  eyes:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 20, 2011, 01:59:37 PM
Not a line per se but flavoured coffees seem to have quite an effect on the women I'm working with  whistle:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Nick on May 20, 2011, 02:09:24 PM
 eeek:

Rohypnol flavour?
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 20, 2011, 02:10:46 PM
No you buffoon, caramel, vanilla, chocolate etc  lol:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Barman on May 20, 2011, 02:17:29 PM
Not a line per se but flavoured coffees seem to have quite an effect on the women I'm working with  whistle:

Cat shite?  rubschin:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Nick on May 20, 2011, 02:24:43 PM
I can boil up Jim's  angel1



 sick2:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 20, 2011, 03:35:20 PM
Not a line per se but flavoured coffees seem to have quite an effect on the women I'm working with  whistle:

Cat shite?  rubschin:

Do you know how much Civet coffee costs? No way in hell I'd take that into work again.  noooo:

Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Barman on May 21, 2011, 02:48:12 PM
Not a line per se but flavoured coffees seem to have quite an effect on the women I'm working with  whistle:

Cat shite?  rubschin:

Do you know how much Civet coffee costs? No way in hell I'd take that into work again.  noooo:



 lol: lol: lol:

Is the answer £26.49 for 57g? (http://www.firebox.com/product/1077/Civet-Coffee-Kopi-Luwak)
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Baldy on May 21, 2011, 06:43:30 PM
Not a line per se but flavoured coffees seem to have quite an effect on the women I'm working with  whistle:

Cat shite?  rubschin:

Do you know how much Civet coffee costs? No way in hell I'd take that into work again.  noooo:



You really know how to pull the werk laydees....." Hey luv try this coffee"....."you like it?" ........."Great! Guess where it comes from?"........"Gladys, how much longer are you going to be in that toilet? We are supposed to be going for a drink tonight."
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Barman on May 21, 2011, 06:54:44 PM
Not a line per se but flavoured coffees seem to have quite an effect on the women I'm working with  whistle:

Cat shite?  rubschin:

Do you know how much Civet coffee costs? No way in hell I'd take that into work again.  noooo:



You really know how to pull the werk laydees....." Hey luv try this coffee"....."you like it?" ........."Great! Guess where it comes from?"........"Gladys, how much longer are you going to be in that toilet? We are supposed to be going for a drink tonight."

Nah... he uses the old "does this cloth smell like chloroform to you?" line...  whistle:
Title: Re: It's been a while since
Post by: Baldy on May 21, 2011, 06:58:54 PM
 lol: lol: lol: