Switching bank accounts

[Pastis]

Of course they all claim it's a doddle, it's as easy as falling off a log, but is it?

I started the migration process on June 2nd; I reckoned it would probably take around a month according to their estimates but I'm not so sure now. I had three accounts with Bastards Barclays; trading, personal and investment. I've closed down the investment account because their opponents in this game of two halves have offered an attractive 6% on the trading account for the first 12 months ~ a no brainer I think they call it. 

The next step is to detail all the DDRs and STO's that are going to be transferred. This sounds straightforward but in reality we're in golden cock up territory and yes, Santander have scored their first own goal! I'd taken the option of a free overdraft facility for the first 12 months to ensure that I wouldn't be charged if the DDRs were called before funds were in place. What did they do? Refuse a DDR and charge me!

Oi! Ref! Penalty!  Santander back down, reimburse the charge and apologise. Mr.P - 1    Santander - 0

I believe it's really worth doing, but by 'ell you've got to keep your eyes peeled and your wits about you. 

[Nick]

Banks are run by twats. Simples.

[Pastis]

Banks are run by twats. Simples.

Agreed. And do you pay for the privilege or not? Eh? ...

[Snoopy]

But But But ~ NuLabour (may even have been Gordon himself) said they had made it easier ~ compulsorily so ~ to change banks. The Bankers (sp) had to comply with legislation that said they must provide all information and automatically transfer DDs and SO to the new bank of choice.
Surely we are not now to believe they told us untruths ~ are we?

[Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)]

Of course they all claim it's a doddle, it's as easy as falling off a log, but is it?

I started the migration process on June 2nd; I reckoned it would probably take around a month according to their estimates but I'm not so sure now. I had three accounts with Bastards Barclays; trading, personal and investment. I've closed down the investment account because their opponents in this game of two halves have offered an attractive 6% on the trading account for the first 12 months ~ a no brainer I think they call it. 

The next step is to detail all the DDRs and STO's that are going to be transferred. This sounds straightforward but in reality we're in golden cock up territory and yes, Santander have scored their first own goal! I'd taken the option of a free overdraft facility for the first 12 months to ensure that I wouldn't be charged if the DDRs were called before funds were in place. What did they do? Refuse a DDR and charge me!

Oi! Ref! Penalty!  Santander back down, reimburse the charge and apologise. Mr.P - 1    Santander - 0

I believe it's really worth doing, but by 'ell you've got to keep your eyes peeled and your wits about you. 

Quite so Mr P. I have done this a number of times but it is time consuming and you have to keep on top of it.  At the end of the day they are not there for you despite what they say, they are there for them and their profit margins. I am 50 now and have 4 children all grown and out of the nest now. I am working my way back to a cash only situation, a year should see me there and I can't wait tbh.

[Nick]

All my recent experience of banks has been of staggering incompetence. And still we talk of the inefficiencies of the public sector  At least the Boy's skool is there every day and does what it promises to do.

[Snoopy]

The Boy's skool is, if I may say so, an exception. About the only thing the skools in this area do is to give the pupils somewhere to shelter from the rain.
Teaching may or may not be taking place. Learning, most certainly, is not

[Nick]

Fair point, but the national mindset is now "public sector bad, private sector good". There may be some economic justification for that, but the banks are crap and other private services I use (let's think of boiler repairs for a moment) are crap beyond belief. The hospital tomorrow will, I trust, do their best.

[Snoopy]

The THW's As level History exam consists of two papers. After paper two the students gathered outside of the examination room and exchanged views.
One common theme emerged from the debate "Where the f*** did that stuff come from?  We haven't touched on that" ~ about 50% of the cohort felt the same.
So a deputation went to the Head of the History Department and discovered that they had missed the first 6 weeks of the term due to their allotted teacher being off sick and on her return she had simply picked up from week 7. The other half of the cohort had a different teacher and had covered the whole curriculum. No-one had bothered to disclose to the students of the absent teacher (who were overseen in classes by a series of supply teachers) that they had not been given the full curriculum until they found they could not complete the examination. A strongly worded appeal has now been launched but the initial response from the school is "Don't blame us, the students should have asked"
This is, of course, symptomatic of the modern method of not teaching history chronologically but in "sound bites". If there is no order to the subject teaching how do you know if a lump has been missed?

[Snoopy]

To get back to the point ~ The Public Sector has long been going bad. Nu Labour made it that way. The Private Sector was ruined by the same people. The only people you can now trust to do their best for you are yourselves.

[Nick]

Your local school(s) is/are incompetent. So much is clear. And Miss D's boiler man, Growler's customers, Pastis's customers, my solicitor, the estate agents, the surveyors, the local council, my MP, BP, Gordon Brown

Perhaps the only ones I trust are local sole traders, although the TV repair man was a cvnt.

Perhaps incompetence is endemic. (Turnip farmers excepted)

[Snoopy]

My feelings exactly.

[Pastis]

Update #001.
Because Santander (think Spain vs. England) had messed up the overdraft facility and declined the DD, the payee (house contents policy) have issued a £20 penalty  

Mr P passes the ball over to Santander who let it into the back of their net! Yay! Another own goal!  They agree to credit the account to the tune of a couple of Pavarottis

Mr P. - 2   Santander - 0


PS  I'm waiting for this to all go horribly wrong 

[Pastis]

Cock up  Cock up  Cock up 

I have now been sent a threatening letter by an insurance company because I failed to make a payment.    I didn't, fecking Santander failed you tw@ts! 

Banks are indeed run by twats. 

[Pastis]

Cock up # 003:

HMRC have failed to take the DD for National Ins. contributions because their computer tried to take them out of the old bank account 
They send me 3 pages of Very Officially Concerned type letters and that I must contact them. I do.
Think Geordie lass on the other end of the phone:
"Ooooh Nooooo, Ah canna think what's 'appened. The compu'er moosta scanned it wrong, ah 'spose."
Well there's a simple fix, says I. Just double the amount for July and then go back to the normal DD on the new account.
"Ooooh ah doon't know if we can do that. Ah'll 'ave to ask me soopah-vizor. We might 'ave to send you ah bill for the oonpaid month"
Just do what you have to then ... 
"Right oh. Byeee then!"

Cock up # 004:

I had requested registration to online banking to monitor both accounts. It's now July 3rd; the process began on June 2nd. They eventually send me yesterday the secret Registration Number which was subsequent to the secret Passcode which was subsequent to the secret Personal ID ... Phew! Armed with a plethora of secret characters and numbers I can now access online banking.  ...
I log on. What do I find? I can see my personal bank account and strangely an old Abbey National saver account that's got about £30 in it   
I can't access the Business account! 

More phone calls ... "Ooooh, that's not good. We'd better sort it out for ya."