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Author Topic: TMR's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread  (Read 12446 times)

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Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #90 on: June 01, 2009, 07:17:08 PM »
So no news yet then .......

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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #91 on: June 01, 2009, 07:24:38 PM »
Quote from: Barman on May 18, 2009, 12:01:37 PM
Quote from: Nick on May 18, 2009, 11:57:23 AM
There is one where I make a man disappear
rubschin:

TMR?

I am not sure I appreciate your tone!
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #92 on: June 03, 2009, 11:50:21 AM »
THAT WAS THE WORST HOTEL I HAVE EVER STAYED IN  evil:
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Offline Barman

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #93 on: June 03, 2009, 11:53:29 AM »
Quote from: Nick on June 03, 2009, 11:50:21 AM
THAT WAS THE WORST HOTEL I HAVE EVER STAYED IN  evil:
Popcorn:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #94 on: June 03, 2009, 11:56:33 AM »
1. Sign in toilets. 'We apologise for the vandalism in these toilets'

The sign in question was signwritten and screwed to the wall behind a sheet of perspex!!

2. Overflow thingy in washbasin. NOt connnected to anything. Shoes full of water.

More later!! And remind me to tell you about Captain Ronald McDonald  evil:

And the crowd of tattooed gingers in that pub  scared2:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #95 on: June 03, 2009, 12:18:38 PM »
3. Pilot on the way up was a 'funny man'

'we are now approaching Edinburgh. Those of you on the right side may wish to admire the excellent view of the IKEA FUrniture Warehouse. Ha ha ha.'
 noooo:

'We are about to fly over my house. I shall check to see if the kids are washing my car. If not I may circle and get you all to shout. Ha ha ha.'

SHUT UP AND FLY THE FOOKING PLANE!  cussing:

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Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #96 on: June 03, 2009, 12:26:10 PM »
Did you book the hotel????
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #97 on: June 03, 2009, 01:54:48 PM »
YES  evil:

4. Remove plug from bath and admire fountain of bathwater emerging from washbasin  eeek:

5. Open room window (frosted glass  noooo:) and glimpse World of Pigeons  evil:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #98 on: June 03, 2009, 02:07:16 PM »
6. Instructed in hotel restaurant during dinner to 'ignore' deafening fire alarm and smoke emerging from kitchen. 'There is nothing to be concerned about'  rubschin:
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Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #99 on: June 03, 2009, 02:10:00 PM »
You didn't order the Waldorf salad as well did you  lol: lol: lol:

Welcome back home anyway - we missed you
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #100 on: June 03, 2009, 04:09:42 PM »
Let's face it ~ you were determined not to like it before you set out. noooo:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #101 on: June 03, 2009, 04:56:53 PM »
Of course it's an awful place. Effing kilt makers and haggis and suchshite. And gingers!!  sick2:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #102 on: June 03, 2009, 05:04:35 PM »
Nice looking pub by the river on Monday evening. Pop in. Guy at bar. Accent (that sort). Bright red. SHaven head. Tattoos. Shell suit. 'AREYOOOOOOOOOOOINGLEESH?'

Me: Yes (small smile)  scared2:

IT'S THE FOOKING MATCH, UNNNNNERJNANTEENS V INGLAND AT BLACKBURN AND MY NEPHOOOOO IS PLAYEN ADN WE WILLAVE YER SKINS.

Me: Yes (small smile)  scared2:

Several more tattoed Gingers arrive  scared2:

INNNNNNNGLISH HERE  point:

They become 'intimate'

I flee.

Landlord follows me yelling, 'BUT YERVE NOT FINNISSSSSSHED YER PINT......'

Cheery wave goodbye scared2: and quicken step

Then accosted by some bastard in a fooking kilt!! Shop: 'Freshly Caught Haggis Here' Idiots!!  evil:


« Last Edit: June 03, 2009, 05:09:58 PM by Nick »
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Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #103 on: June 03, 2009, 05:11:07 PM »
Quote from: Nick on June 03, 2009, 05:04:35 PM
They become 'intimate'

eeek:

I'm assuming that just lying there thinking of England wasn't an option whistle:
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Offline Barman

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Re: Nick's all new Bulletins from Scotland thread
« Reply #104 on: June 03, 2009, 07:13:20 PM »
Scum...  noooo:
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