Oh Bugger

[Misunderstood]

Hello Dear, you're home late.
Where's the car?

      Um.. silly me, I lost it in an enormous car park, gave up and got a bus home.
      I'll get it tomorrow.

OK.

...

Hello Dear, You're late again, couldn't you find the car?

      Uh.. No, I.. um.. was working late and too tired to look again.

Never mind Sweetheart, The 'Car Park' phoned and asked if you wanted to keep the fence post they took out of your radiator? They'll deliver it home tomorrow seeing as you can't find them.

     

[Nick]

 

[Barman]

Did it end in tears? 

[Misunderstood]

Don't you rub your chin at me - I didn't name names... 

Ahem: This story is factual and records a moment of real history.
The names have been withheld to protect the insurance record of the concerned party. 

No it was just another day.... in the ....... household




Pusses eh?

[Nick]

I have an amusing story about a cat embedded in a car radiator, another cat, a rose pruner and a hammer. But it's a bit complicated..

[Misunderstood]

I have an amusing story about a cat embedded in a car radiator, another cat, a rose pruner and a hammer. But it's a bit complicated..

Well... What are you waiting for?

[Barman]

I have an amusing story about a cat embedded in a car radiator, another cat, a rose pruner and a hammer. But it's a bit complicated..

You can make it into a mini-series ? lets start with the cat embedded in the radiator. 

[Nick]

Episode 1 then.

Guy I knew (someone's old dad) driving home one day after a liquid lunch ran over a cat.

Stopped the car and got out to inspect the state of the cat.

[Nick]

Episode 2:

Saw a bedraggled cat staggering across the pavement looking in a bad way and decided to put it out if its misery. Found hammer in car and finished it off (in a kindly way, of course).

Resumed journey home.

[Nick]

Epsiode 3:

Was awoken from nap by the police. They enquired if he had any knowledge of a dead cat. He explained what had happened. They invited him outside to look at this car.

[Nick]

Episode 4:

Was shown quite different cat embedded, and somewhat dead, in car radiator grille.

Police explained that the cat he had finished off was a different cat, which was elderly and arthritic, and that the execution had been witnessed by its owner who was out pruning her roses and who had reported him to the police.

They then breathalysed him.

 

It can be amusing when told in the right circumstances.

[Barman]

Is this all true or have you been drinking that cheap booze I sold you last week and hallucinating? 

[Nick]

No it really happened. And our cat has just crapped on our back step in protest about being banished to the garden. Good job I found it before SWMBO got home

[Misunderstood]

Episode 4:

Was shown quite different cat embedded, and somewhat dead, in car radiator grille.

Police explained that the cat he had finished off was a different cat, which was elderly and arthritic, and that the execution had been witnessed by its owner who was out pruning her roses and who had reported him to the police.

They then breathalysed him.

 

It can be amusing when told in the right circumstances.

    Makes my claws curl..... 

They then breathalysed him.   and.... ?

[Nick]

Well, that's the end (in more senses than one)