Tales of the river bank: Nick's all new 2026 lock-keeping adventures thread

[Nick]

Guess which lock I’m at today 

[Steve]

Guess which lock I’m at today 

[Nick]

Autistic Kath is here all day mowing grass and painting fences.

She announces everything she is doing

I’m going to put my hat on
I’ve put my hat on
I’m going to sit down
I’m going to read my book
I’ve finished reading my book
I’m going to make a phone call
I’ve finished my phone call

EVERY. BLOODY. THING 

[Barman]

Autistic Kath is here all day mowing grass and painting fences.

She announces everything she is doing

I’m going to put my hat on
I’ve put my hat on
I’m going to sit down
I’m going to read my book
I’ve finished reading my book
I’m going to make a phone call
I’ve finished my phone call

EVERY. BLOODY. THING 

[Steve]

So is this bye bye Lonely Widow Island and hello Loonie Kath Island?

[Grumpmeister]

Autistic Kath is here all day mowing grass and painting fences.

She announces everything she is doing

I’m going to put my hat on
I’ve put my hat on
I’m going to sit down
I’m going to read my book
I’ve finished reading my book
I’m going to make a phone call
I’ve finished my phone call

EVERY. BLOODY. THING 

I'm going to make a comment about being more tolerant
I'm going to type it out
I'm going to proof read it

You should be more tolerant Nick..

I'm going to post it

 

[Nick]

She was there for 7 hours 

[Steve]

Autistic Kath is here all day mowing grass and painting fences.

She announces everything she is doing

I’m going to put my hat on
I’ve put my hat on
I’m going to sit down
I’m going to read my book
I’ve finished reading my book
I’m going to make a phone call
I’ve finished my phone call

EVERY. BLOODY. THING 

I'm going to make a comment about being more tolerant
I'm going to type it out
I'm going to proof read it

You should be more tolerant Nick..

I'm going to post it

 

I found that funny
I'm going to look for that laughing emojiwotsit
I've found it
I've forgotten how to post it
Now I remember
 

[Grumpmeister]

Autistic Kath is here all day mowing grass and painting fences.

She announces everything she is doing

I’m going to put my hat on
I’ve put my hat on
I’m going to sit down
I’m going to read my book
I’ve finished reading my book
I’m going to make a phone call
I’ve finished my phone call

EVERY. BLOODY. THING 

I'm going to make a comment about being more tolerant
I'm going to type it out
I'm going to proof read it

You should be more tolerant Nick..

I'm going to post it

 

I found that funny
I'm going to look for that laughing emojiwotsit
I've found it
I've forgotten how to post it
Now I remember
 

I saw Steve's post
I chuckled at Steve's post
I wonder how long we can keep this up for and who else might join in
I posted a reply

 

[Steve]

 

[Barman]

Autistic Kath is here all day mowing grass and painting fences.

She announces everything she is doing

I’m going to put my hat on
I’ve put my hat on
I’m going to sit down
I’m going to read my book
I’ve finished reading my book
I’m going to make a phone call
I’ve finished my phone call

EVERY. BLOODY. THING 

I'm going to make a comment about being more tolerant
I'm going to type it out
I'm going to proof read it

You should be more tolerant Nick..

I'm going to post it

 

I found that funny
I'm going to look for that laughing emojiwotsit
I've found it
I've forgotten how to post it
Now I remember
 

I saw Steve's post
I chuckled at Steve's post
I wonder how long we can keep this up for and who else might join in
I posted a reply

 

I read this post
I was confused
I read the previous posts
It all made sense then
I thought I should type something really funny to complete the thread
I thought about it for a bit, scratching my head
I couldn't think of anything
I decided to post the embarrassed emoticon instead
 

[Steve]

 

[Grumpmeister]

I guess the Meister may have an idea…

An asylum of Nicks?

 

A Nod of Nicks 


 

 

[Barman]

I guess the Meister may have an idea…

An asylum of Nicks?

 

A Nod of Nicks 


 

 

 

[Nick]

Back there tomorrow and 250 paddle boarders racing from Nottingham to Newark.

What can possibly go wrong?