Well, where to begin? Taxi took us through the grounds to the specified bit of the castle on the "island"
Waitresses with buck's fizz and or wine circulated. Log fire. Lots of rellies, some of whom seem to have aged alarmingly

and my fave cousin who I have not seen for 25 years (she rather kept a low profile after she made the front page of the News of the Screws

but no one mentions that

). One cousin I had forgotten about entirely and countless kids and grandkids I had never seen at all. Very odd to see lots of unfamiliar people with oddly familiar noses, eyes, expressions and gestures. The DNA was palpable though the womenfolk all seem to have knee problems

Live music
Excellent three course lunch with posh service and unlimited collapso

Tour of the castle followed by birthday cake and fizz

Musical cousins then saddled up, first for a selection of George Formby songs before switching to jazz and blues. Cousin Biff produced and played his legendary musical saw

More music and some dancing then back to No 2 hotel where various cousins came and went for 4 or 5 hours exchanging some startling fragments of family history and gossip (revelations about adultery, cross-dressing, disputed parentage

, feuds, enmity with the Copenhagen branch of the Nick Clan over some legacy, rumours of other possible half cousins

)
Collapso flowed
Back to the Hilton.
Back to Hotel 2 this morning for coffee and more goss
All over now

Below: Biff plays the saw

