THE WORRIED TYPE:
Makes furtive inspection of tool without peeing
SOCIAL TYPE:
Joins mates for a pee, whether wanting one or not.
EXCITABLE TYPE:
Underpants twisted, can't fin "Y" front, tears pants down in temper.
TIMID TYPE:
Can't pee if anyone is looking, pretends to, then sneaks back later.
NOISY TYPE:
Whistles and sings loudly, peeps over partition to examine other's tool.
INDIFFERENT TYPE:
All urinals occupied, so pees in washbasin.
CLEVER TYPE:
Pees without holding tool, shows off by adjusting tie at the same time.
FRIVOLOUS TYPE:
Pees all round urinal, aims jet at flies and dog-ends.
ABSENT MINDED TYPE:
Opens jacket, pulls out necktie, pees in trousers.
PERSONALITY TYPE:
Stands for a time, grunts, farts, and walks out smiling.
UNCOUTH TYPE:
Pees down leg into shoe, walks out with flies open, adjusts balls in the street.
SNEAKY TYPE:
Drops silent fart, sniffs in a suspicious manner, whilst frowning at the bloke in the next stall.
UNLUCKY TYPE:
Tries to fart, shits himself, then finds he can't pee.
TOUGH TYPE:
Bangs tool on urinal to knock drops off.
VAIN TYPE:
Undoes five buttons when one would do.
CHILDISH TYPE:
Looks down at the bottom of the urinal, fascinated by the swirling bubbles.
QUEER TYPE:
Holds tool in two fingers, little finger raised, admires others and wipes tool with hanky.
DRUNK TYPE:
Pulls out tool, sees two, so puts one away and pees himself.
SAVILLE ROW TYPE:
Pees on shoes, wipes shoes with silk monogrammed handkerchief.
ADVENTUROUS TYPE:
Pees into flushing system, shakes head to get backwash out of eyes.
SELF OPINIONATED TYPE:
Looks for drynwall, proceeds to write name with jet.