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Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Sour Puss on September 08, 2007, 03:11:46 PM

Title: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Sour Puss on September 08, 2007, 03:11:46 PM
<Snigger>

QE2 liner breaks down on cruise
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The QE2 was in the middle of a cruise of the Mediterranean

The QE2 has broken down after suffering a mechanical fault off Croatia during a Mediterranean cruise.
Shipping firm Cunard said there were about 1,750 passengers on board the cruise liner.
Company spokesman Eric Flounders said the ship, which left Southampton last Friday, had been due to set sail from the Adriatic port of Dubrovnik.
An engineer has been sent to fix the fault but it is not known how long the repairs will take, he added.


Floating hotel
The QE2 is timetabled to start her 40th anniversary cruise from Southampton next Saturday.
Earlier this year, more than 300 passengers and crew on board the ship suffered from a bug which caused vomiting and diarrhea.
The liner has only just over a year left at sea before she sails to Dubai to become a floating hotel.
The 70,000-tonne vessel, launched by the Queen in 1967, is to be sold to a firm called Dubai World.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/6985176.stm
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 03:14:34 PM
 rubschin: You suspect something fishy going on?
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Misunderstood on September 08, 2007, 03:33:04 PM
Quote from: Pussy Galore on September 08, 2007, 03:11:46 PM

Shipping firm Cunard ... Company spokesman Eric Flounders said the ship, which left Southampton last Friday...

How on earth did a man with a name like that, get a job with Cunard?  It MUST be his fault!
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 03:35:31 PM
Quote from: Bouncer on September 08, 2007, 03:33:04 PM
Quote from: Pussy Galore on September 08, 2007, 03:11:46 PM

Shipping firm Cunard ... Company spokesman Eric Flounders said the ship, which left Southampton last Friday...

How on earth did a man with a name like that, get a job with Cunard?  It MUST be his fault!

Simply a red herring.
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits) on September 08, 2007, 04:14:10 PM
Quote from: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 03:35:31 PM
Quote from: Bouncer on September 08, 2007, 03:33:04 PM
Quote from: Pussy Galore on September 08, 2007, 03:11:46 PM

Shipping firm Cunard ... Company spokesman Eric Flounders said the ship, which left Southampton last Friday...

How on earth did a man with a name like that, get a job with Cunard?  It MUST be his fault!

Simply a red herring.

If it's that bad with the name Eric, he should count himself lucky he was not christened Nick!
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Pastis on September 08, 2007, 04:26:33 PM
Quote
BBC NEWS: Are you on board the ship or do you know someone who is? Send us your experiences using the form below. Or send us your text messages to 61124.

Ahh, yes, Dear BBSea, Ha! See what I did there?
Anyway, we're still stuck in ruddy Dubrovny or whatever it's called. Damn nuisnace really - should be in Venice tonight mourning Pav with all the I-ties but, hey-ho, obviously not to be. The mood was getting a trifle nasty earlier but the Captain ordered a free bar as some sort of compo and Marjorie (SWMBO) is now on her seventh large G&T! and trying to organise a Hokey Cokie around the deck. I've arranged a free massage with some little Filipino filly who looks rather eager to please. Word is that the prop got fouled on a supermarket trolley in the harbour and they're flying out an engineer to sort it out; ha! some chance! Ever tried to get a plumber on a Saturday night? So, tonight's entertainment will be a repeat of last night's - if they can encourage anyone to leave the bar. Oh, and tonight's film is Titanic with that Winslett girl; poor choice in my view but there you go. All for now, toodlepip! Best regards, Fortescue Tremayne, (Major, Rtd.)
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Misunderstood on September 08, 2007, 05:13:24 PM
Fortescue Tremayne, (Major, Rtd.)

Good heavens Tre,  Fancy hearing about you after all these years, and you're still causing trouble.

What have you been up to that you can afford the QE II then?  Pension isn't what it was, don't y'know.

I am also surprised that you seem to have forgotten how to sign yourself, didn't they teach you at Sandhurst to put your rank first and the rtd last in brackets

Fondly yours,

Maj. Shuttleworth. Hilary (Rtd.)
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits) on September 08, 2007, 05:19:22 PM
Quote from: Bouncer on September 08, 2007, 05:13:24 PM
Fortescue Tremayne, (Major, Rtd.)

Good heavens Tre,  Fancy hearing about you after all these years, and you're still causing trouble.

What have you been up to that you can afford the QE II then?  Pension isn't what it was, don't y'know.

I am also surprised that you seem to have forgotten how to sign yourself, didn't they teach you at Sandhurst to put your rank first and the rtd last in brackets

Fondly yours,

Maj. Shuttleworth. Hilary (Rtd.)

Good God! Shutters old man, how the devil are you? I've not seen you in a devil's age don't you know.

I'll always remember that year we went tiger shooting in the old Raj - dashed good fun that was and no mistake. God, how we laughed over tiffin about the one that nearly got old Goldstone-Browne - do you remember? Mind you, he was never much good afterwards, or so the memsah'b always said.

We'll have to get together if ever you're down in this neck of the woods - Eastbourne, on the South Coast. Just ask anyone in the town for Lieutenant-Colonel Tristan C Allardyce (Rtd) OBE
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2007, 05:20:44 PM
Quote from: Marley's Ghost on September 08, 2007, 04:14:10 PM
Quote from: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 03:35:31 PM
Quote from: Bouncer on September 08, 2007, 03:33:04 PM
Quote from: Pussy Galore on September 08, 2007, 03:11:46 PM

Shipping firm Cunard ... Company spokesman Eric Flounders said the ship, which left Southampton last Friday...

How on earth did a man with a name like that, get a job with Cunard?  It MUST be his fault!

Simply a red herring.

If it's that bad with the name Eric, he should count himself lucky he was not christened Nick!

I am listening you know. I was called Nicholas because I was due at Christmas (Santa). I didn't actually emerge for a further month, much to my mother's everlasting distress. OK?
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits) on September 08, 2007, 05:26:03 PM
Quote from: Nick on September 08, 2007, 05:20:44 PM
Quote from: Marley's Ghost on September 08, 2007, 04:14:10 PM
Quote from: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 03:35:31 PM
Quote from: Bouncer on September 08, 2007, 03:33:04 PM
Quote from: Pussy Galore on September 08, 2007, 03:11:46 PM

Shipping firm Cunard ... Company spokesman Eric Flounders said the ship, which left Southampton last Friday...

How on earth did a man with a name like that, get a job with Cunard?  It MUST be his fault!

Simply a red herring.

If it's that bad with the name Eric, he should count himself lucky he was not christened Nick!

I am listening you know. I was called Nicholas because I was due at Christmas (Santa). I didn't actually emerge for a further month, much to my mother's everlasting distress. OK?

So . . . . . you were causing grief and mayhem for those around you even before you were born! Bloody hell, it gets worse.

Have you any idea over what radius the 'Nick effect' operates? I'd rather like to be safe - maybe Scotland or Cornwall are options.
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2007, 05:38:42 PM
Since I refuse to go to Scotland you would be safe there. Probably.

I was also 12lbs at birth. (The ladies will understand what that might mean eeek:)
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Pastis on September 08, 2007, 05:49:08 PM
Ship to Shore: Telex: F.A.O. Maj. Shuttleworth. Hilary (Rtd.)

Hilary, old bean!
Well I never! Sorry about the etiquette slippage - rather too many Malts in the free bar. It would appear everyone's getting decidedly squiffy and standards are dropping, besides, haven't used my regimental sign off for ages. Self and SWMBO are just about to go into dinner; it's another formal night and Marjorie's taffeta seems to be moulting - there's some lodged in my cuff link for some unaccountable reason. I'm pleased to report the ship seems to be moving - either that or the cabin's bathroom mirror has a will of it's own.
Will be in touch once we hit land. Toodlepip!
Tre.

PS. Is this Allardyce fellah related to Hermione? If so, we might be related.
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Misunderstood on September 08, 2007, 06:50:10 PM
Maj. T. Fortescue (Rtd)
c/o  Queen Elizabeth II
Adriatic Sea somewhere

 

(personal communique) OHMS

Tre, Good Grief,

I never expected the Bombay Officers Club to surface in a place like this! >sniff<  We really must get together if when you make it home.

Hermione >sigh< Aaah! the memories ....  I hope she is tickety-boo still?   Alas no, she denies any knowledge of this Lt. Col chappie  -  Thinking about it, wasn't he the strapper that represented us at the Court Martial business back in Calcutta?  (I really didn't actually do things like that), and we all got a bit pally afters.   Memory isn't what it was y'know.   

Browne!  That was the chap, I'd quite forgotten about him - had a vibrator thingy imported for the Memsahib if I remember?   That was when the damn coolies pinched the design and sold millions of the blighters.   Wish I'd thought of it.  Never mind ... Least said ...    See you later when you get home,  I will invite that Col chap whose name I can't quite remember.  Odd fellow! I'm not used to Colonels addressing me - makes me feel nervous if truth be told, even worse with the gong.

Chin chin

Hilary
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 07:22:09 PM
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Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2007, 07:47:00 PM
What is this thread about?
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 07:48:47 PM
Some people stuck on a boat making fishy sounding puns


I reckon they'll be having  a whale of a time.
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Misunderstood on September 08, 2007, 07:59:12 PM
Quote from: Nick on September 08, 2007, 07:47:00 PM
What is this thread about?

Clear orff! 

This thread has been officially requisitioned by the Bombay Officers Club.

Private.
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 08:14:26 PM
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We were with Baden Powell at Mafeking ~ can we come in for a drink?
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Misunderstood on September 08, 2007, 08:20:52 PM
Quote from: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 08:14:26 PM
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We were with Baden Powell at Mafeking ~ can we come in for a drink?


Only if you have some good war stories....   
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 08:22:32 PM
I remember well the day war broke out ....................................  tunble:
things had been pretty quiet for some months and Algy and I were stooging around over the Channel


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You will stay awake now won't you?
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Pastis on September 08, 2007, 10:29:22 PM
Ship to Shore: Telethingy/email/satellite bypass: F.A.O. Maj. Shuttleworth. Hilary (Rtd.)

Hilary, psst, we seem to be getting some intereference so I'll make this brief.

Just having a little 'good night snifter' before retiring. Sadly Marjorie passed out between the Abricot Sorbet and the Bombe Alaska and is presently sawing logs the size of Canadian pines ... ZZZZZzzzzzz...

We seem to be on our way to Trieste, which is somewhat ironic since the last time I was there I had a dalliance with a delightful young gal in the resistance back in '43. That was after I left Bombay, I think... memory failing too here I'm afraid. Trieste; is that Italy or Slovenia these days? Bloody Eurozone is getting me confused.

You would not believe the state of this ship! 40 years old and someone did a bloody good deal flogging her to the Arabs. Tonight - bodies everywhere, champagne flutes rolling around on the promenade deck. Think I'll probably spend the rest of the night browsing this interweb thing since some fool gave me his Officer Internet Card as ID!

Toodlepip,

Tre
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Misunderstood on September 08, 2007, 11:00:18 PM
Quote from: Pastis on September 08, 2007, 10:29:22 PM
Ship to Shore: Telethingy/email/satellite bypass: F.A.O. Maj. Shuttleworth. Hilary (Rtd.)

Hilary, psst, we seem to be getting some intereference so I'll make this brief.

Just having a little 'good night snifter' before retiring. Sadly Marjorie passed out between the Abricot Sorbet and the Bombe Alaska and is presently sawing logs the size of Canadian pines ... ZZZZZzzzzzz...

We seem to be on our way to Trieste, which is somewhat ironic since the last time I was there I had a dalliance with a delightful young gal in the resistance back in '43. That was after I left Bombay, I think... memory failing too here I'm afraid. Trieste; is that Italy or Slovenia these days? Bloody Eurozone is getting me confused.

You would not believe the state of this ship! 40 years old and someone did a bloody good deal flogging her to the Arabs. Tonight - bodies everywhere, champagne flutes rolling around on the promenade deck. Think I'll probably spend the rest of the night browsing this interweb thing since some fool gave me his Officer Internet Card as ID!

Toodlepip,

Tre

Bounce reply.
Encode NATO Class IIa

Tre,

I remember that girl!  you lucky, lucky beggar!  Trieste belonged to Italy last time I was there, but they did play tennis with it for a long time so take your service piece with you just in case...

Just think... all that booze on the old girl and she's going to live with the arabs - poetic justice methinks...

Drop me a line on return and I'll treat you to a Glenmorangie in the club.

By the bye, got this RAF type trying to get in,  blessed brylcream boys get everywhere don't they?  Remember the chaos in Malaya that time when they jettisoned their bombs in a safe place coming home?  Out of all that jungle to aim at, they had to hit our blessed gin store.  Tykes.  Serves us right they said - we should have shared... Hah!

After all this excitement I have to go and take a power nap to brighten up and rest my eyes. you'll be surfing the fishing net or something then? These naval chaps were always a pushover for a sob story and a gin.  Ha ha.

Chin Chin

H
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Sour Puss on September 09, 2007, 01:13:15 AM
Urgent message to: Bombay Officers Club

From:  Room Q2T, GCHQ, Hubble Road, Cheltenham, GL51 0EX

QT@gchq.qts.gov.uk


Kirxipqir, tpiewi giegi erh hiwmwx. Gsrhygx yrfigsqmrk, alex.
Title: Re: QE2 Floundering
Post by: Misunderstood on September 09, 2007, 04:19:22 AM
OK Message received and implemented.

21222 12111 12121 11112 122212 112212 212212 112111

BOC out.