We'll have a whip round to see what we can raise ...... you emptied the "Blind Box" and the "Poppy Tin" before you left for your holiday 
And the condom machine in the ladies.... 
Funny you should say that. When we had pubs I allowed "MATES" to install machines in both ladies and gents. Their rep would call monthly and replenish the machines, remove the cash box and count it out in front of me. He/she would then divi up my commission. The "Ladies" machine always paid out twice as much as the one in the "Gents"
An additional observation was that the "Ladies" machine sold out of "Flavoured" varieties faster than the ordinary ones. The "Gents" never sold more than one pack of flavours a month!
Tells you something but I am quite not sure what.
The first time, following installation, the rep called to re-stock the machines he came through the door to the bar where I was standing and simply said "Mates?" in an enquiring tone. I had forgotten the condom machines and held out my hand saying "Happy to be friends with anyone"
Having recovered from this unexpected greeting he said "Nah ~ I've come to do the condoms" and walked toward the bogs. I followed and as we got to the door of the Ladies he asked "Had any complaints?" ..... to this day I carry a mental image of someone coming through the door, heavily pregnant and saying "'Ere you, I used condoms from your machine and they didn't f'ing work ... watcher goin' to do about it?"
Edit to say ~ If "The Affs" were around I'm sure they would point out that I have prolly told this tale before ..... Sorry
