Author Topic: Fresh from the Inbox  (Read 387940 times)

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Online Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #435 on: February 27, 2011, 08:21:44 PM »
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #436 on: February 27, 2011, 10:28:26 PM »
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NacppJ_vWQg

as seen on that sunday night show ... ;D

Offline Pirate

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #437 on: February 28, 2011, 12:17:49 AM »
Priceless...I like Brian Blessed...from the moment he was in

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wHTdDeh50kI

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Offline Snoopy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #439 on: February 28, 2011, 08:32:12 AM »
I just wish the camera had stayed on him as the look on his face would have been priceless!  lol: lol: lol:
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Pastis

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #440 on: March 01, 2011, 10:11:06 AM »
Like the Buddhist said to the hot dog vendor...
"Make me one with everything"

Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #441 on: March 04, 2011, 11:12:23 AM »
ALERTS TO TERROR THREATS IN 2011 EUROPE: BY JOHN CLEESE

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out.

Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing.." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and "The barbie is canceled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #442 on: March 04, 2011, 11:53:43 AM »
You might care to add the Welsh into this.

The Welsh have moved from blaming the English to singing awful hymns.
Should this not work they will escalate their alert to "Sheep and Children First"
The final option will be to declare that yesterday's referendum means they can take their ball and skulk off home.
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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #443 on: March 06, 2011, 07:20:32 PM »
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #444 on: March 07, 2011, 10:29:19 AM »

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #445 on: March 07, 2011, 01:12:11 PM »
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #446 on: March 07, 2011, 01:13:42 PM »

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Online Just One More

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #448 on: March 07, 2011, 11:30:49 PM »
I was in the pub with the missus and i said 'I love you '
She asked if it was me or the beer talking .
You should have seen her face when I told her I was talking to my beer .
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #449 on: March 08, 2011, 06:10:24 AM »
I was in the pub with the missus and i said 'I love you '
She asked if it was me or the beer talking .
You should have seen her face when I told her I was talking to my beer .

 lol: lol: lol:
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