Amputation for sure 
If he thinks I am buying grapes.......
Grab some hemorrhoids from a theatre much more fun.
Meanwhile I am savouring that satisfying moment when......Having asked Mr C if he wished to talk to the nice Indian gentleman from a call center, who was not selling anything, certainly not PPI claims, oh no siree, just wanting to ask a few demographic questions and having relayed a message from Mr C to the nice indian gentleman from the call centre who was not selling anything, oh no siree, just wanting to ask a few demographic questions that went along the lines of 'no not really' I was able to say to the nice Indian gentleman from the call centre when he cheerily said maybe I could help and was he speaking to the wife of Mr C 'no I am his mistress'. I listened to the stunned silence then the nice Indian gentleman from the call centre said 'oh really' in a funny squeaky voice and hung up before I could say 'yes'. That's my fun over with for the morning.
