Disgusterous

Author Topic: Hat, coat...  (Read 398420 times)

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Offline Just One More

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3630 on: January 13, 2021, 11:36:19 PM »
The other night my wife and I arrived at our favourite restaurant a little early for our reservation. ...........

The manager said “Do you mind waiting a bit?”..........

“No” I said “Not at all”..............


“Great” said the manager “Can you take these drinks over to table seven?”.... redface:
drumroll:

 drumroll: drumroll:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Barman

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3631 on: January 14, 2021, 07:46:18 AM »
The other night my wife and I arrived at our favourite restaurant a little early for our reservation. ...........

The manager said “Do you mind waiting a bit?”..........

“No” I said “Not at all”..............


“Great” said the manager “Can you take these drinks over to table seven?”.... redface:
drumroll:

 drumroll: drumroll:
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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3632 on: January 14, 2021, 11:44:31 AM »
The other night my wife and I arrived at our favourite restaurant a little early for our reservation. ...........

The manager said “Do you mind waiting a bit?”..........

“No” I said “Not at all”..............


“Great” said the manager “Can you take these drinks over to table seven?”.... redface:
drumroll:

 drumroll: drumroll:
drumroll: drumroll: drumroll:
I mostly despair

Offline Just One More

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3633 on: January 14, 2021, 06:02:36 PM »
The other night my wife and I arrived at our favourite restaurant a little early for our reservation. ...........

The manager said “Do you mind waiting a bit?”..........

“No” I said “Not at all”..............


“Great” said the manager “Can you take these drinks over to table seven?”.... redface:
drumroll:

 drumroll: drumroll:
drumroll: drumroll: drumroll:

 drumroll: drumroll: drumroll: drumroll:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline apc2010

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3634 on: January 17, 2021, 12:46:22 AM »
That's the last time I try and sell a TV on eBay........... evil:



I had 47 people watching it, the cheeky bastards........... noooo:

Offline Barman

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3635 on: January 17, 2021, 06:34:02 AM »
That's the last time I try and sell a TV on eBay........... evil:



I had 47 people watching it, the cheeky bastards........... noooo:

happy001
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Offline Steve

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3636 on: January 17, 2021, 12:12:31 PM »
That's the last time I try and sell a TV on eBay........... evil:



I had 47 people watching it, the cheeky bastards........... noooo:

happy001
happy001 happy001
Well, whatever, nevermind

Offline Barman

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3637 on: January 17, 2021, 12:26:37 PM »
Two priests are off to the showers late one night. They undress and step into the showers before they realize there is no soap.
Father John says he has soap in his room and goes to get it, not bothering to dress.
He grabs two bars of soap, one in each hand , and heads back to the showers.
He is halfway down the hall when he sees three nuns heading his way Having no place to hide, he stands against the wall and freezes like he's a statue.
The nuns stop and comment on how life-like he looks.
The first nun suddenly reaches out and pulls on his manhood.
Startled, he drops a bar of soap.
"Oh look" says the first nun, "it's a soap dispenser".
To test her theory the second nun also pulls on his manhood.
Sure enough, he drops the second bar of soap.
Now the third nun decides to have a go.
She pulls once, then twice and three times but nothing happens.
So she gives several more tugs, then yells...
"Holy Mary, Mother of God, HAND LOTION TOO!"
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3638 on: January 21, 2021, 08:15:46 PM »
My next door neighbor asked me over the fence last night what I was doing in the garden//////////


I said I'm planting all my vegetables and herbs and in alphabetical order............!


He said I don't see were you get the time!...............????




It's easy I said its next to the sage ............. redface:

Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3639 on: January 21, 2021, 08:19:24 PM »
My next door neighbor asked me over the fence last night what I was doing in the garden//////////


I said I'm planting all my vegetables and herbs and in alphabetical order............!


He said I don't see were you get the time!...............????




It's easy I said its next to the sage ............. redface:
tunble:
I mostly despair

Offline Steve

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3640 on: January 21, 2021, 09:19:26 PM »
My next door neighbor asked me over the fence last night what I was doing in the garden//////////


I said I'm planting all my vegetables and herbs and in alphabetical order............!


He said I don't see were you get the time!...............????




It's easy I said its next to the sage ............. redface:
tunble:
  tunble: tunble:   but I did laugh so  lol:
Well, whatever, nevermind

Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3641 on: January 29, 2021, 01:28:17 AM »
If you ask Rick Astley for a DVD of the movie Up, he won’t give it to you because he’s never gonna give you Up. However, by not giving you Up like you asked for it, he’s letting you down. This is known as the Astley paradox.

 redface:
The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.

Offline Barman

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3642 on: January 29, 2021, 06:45:45 AM »
If you ask Rick Astley for a DVD of the movie Up, he won’t give it to you because he’s never gonna give you Up. However, by not giving you Up like you asked for it, he’s letting you down. This is known as the Astley paradox.

 redface:

facepalm:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3643 on: February 07, 2021, 08:17:00 PM »
Had a warning today from Constabulary about KEYS......


Homeowners are being warned about 4 keys that can open:

73% of doors, 84% of cars, 99% of houses..........


They are the following:


Dar-keys, Pak- keys, Pie-keys and Jun-keys............... redface:

Offline Barman

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Re: Hat, coat...
« Reply #3644 on: February 08, 2021, 06:01:02 AM »
Had a warning today from Constabulary about KEYS......


Homeowners are being warned about 4 keys that can open:

73% of doors, 84% of cars, 99% of houses..........


They are the following:


Dar-keys, Pak- keys, Pie-keys and Jun-keys............... redface:

happy001
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