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Author Topic: Diary of "the snip".  (Read 18472 times)

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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Diary of "the snip".
« on: January 28, 2009, 07:07:39 PM »
Sooo...

Despite references to "Jaffa", "Seedless Red Grapes" and "a chop" in the Restuarant thread, no-one seemed to spot, or perhaps comment on a trend, not even DS (shame on you  razz:)

Today, at 2.30 I had "the snip".

Firstly, the minor details - a private hospital in Brixton (eeek:) and I was out within an hour. I had to laugh at the music being played, "The first cut is the deepest" and the biscuits they gave me with the tea afterwards, Ginger Nuts  ;D

Once a room big enough for me to unleash the wedding vegetables was found, the whole procedure took less than 20 minutes. Local anaesthetic is the order of the day, with a certain "slash and burn" methodology. Not painful. Twenty minutes later, after tea and biscuits, the doctor re-examined the area, declared the bleeding to be "within acceptable" limits and then I was out, Mrs TMR (to be) insisting on driving my super comfy Lexus home, or rather to the pub. Despite some road rage on her part (language to make a docker blush) we arrived and I got quickly out of the car. Holy moly, the pain hit a somewhat. Even 3 pints of Young's failed to help much.

Now the gentleman's vegetables seem to have retreated in fear and are making their way towards my stomach. Two hours ago, I was walking like John Wayne, now I am walking like a chimpanzee. Mrs TMR (to be) is in fits of laughter and keeps throwing the "it can't be as painful as childbirth" line at me.

Red wine is being consumed as a painkiller, Nurofen is an option later.

All nuts/knob jokes welcomed, are there any of you out there that have had the same thing and if so, what do the next few days hold in store?

And no, Wenchy, I will not be posting photos...

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #1 on: January 28, 2009, 07:17:37 PM »
Whimper!

Have you got to wear one of these?

I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #2 on: January 28, 2009, 07:21:27 PM »
'Tis a tad snall Snoops  whistle:

Offline Barman

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2009, 07:28:07 PM »
I had it done in London years ago... Mary Stopes(?)...

The thing I remember most was the doctor chatting alkl through the operation like we were in the pub... just not right somehow...  noooo:

Oh, and the burning smell...  sick2:

I travelled home on the tube and train which was not the most brilliant decision of my life...  eeek:

Oh yes, the pain gets worse!  point:
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Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #4 on: January 28, 2009, 07:29:38 PM »
'Tis a tad snall Snoops  whistle:

Never mind old boy, I'm sure they can make a small enough hood for you..  whistle:
The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #5 on: January 28, 2009, 07:32:12 PM »
It's to stop him licking himself you dolt!
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #6 on: January 28, 2009, 07:35:59 PM »
My brother has had it done and my best friends husband ....

Do you want the bad news ....my mates husband had to have it done again last year (2 yrs after the original op) as the tubes had reconnected. Although not looking forward to going through it again the pride of his manhood being so powerful seemed to mitigate his situation somewhat  ::)

Oh and my loutish brother had to take 2 days off work  eeek:
Skubber

Offline Barman

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #7 on: January 28, 2009, 07:37:47 PM »
My brother has had it done and my best friends husband ....

Do you want the bad news ....my mates husband had to have it done again last year (2 yrs after the original op) as the tubes had reconnected. Although not looking forward to going through it again the pride of his manhood being so powerful seemed to mitigate his situation somewhat  ::)

Oh and my loutish brother had to take 2 days off work  eeek:
eeek:

How did he know it needed doing again?  rubschin:
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #8 on: January 28, 2009, 07:38:13 PM »
My brother has had it done and my best friends husband ....

Do you want the bad news ....my mates husband had to have it done again last year (2 yrs after the original op) as the tubes had reconnected. Although not looking forward to going through it again the pride of his manhood being so powerful seemed to mitigate his situation somewhat  ::)

Oh and my loutish brother had to take 2 days off work  eeek:

The things you wimmin talk about between yourselves!  ::)
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #9 on: January 28, 2009, 07:39:19 PM »
My brother has had it done and my best friends husband ....

Do you want the bad news ....my mates husband had to have it done again last year (2 yrs after the original op) as the tubes had reconnected. Although not looking forward to going through it again the pride of his manhood being so powerful seemed to mitigate his situation somewhat  ::)

Oh and my loutish brother had to take 2 days off work  eeek:
eeek:

How did he know it needed doing again?  rubschin:

She prolly got pregnant and he believed it was his ~ there's one born every minute.
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #10 on: January 28, 2009, 07:40:32 PM »
It's to stop him licking himself you dolt!

I know hound but unless he is a yoga master or removes a couple of ribs he's pretty safe from that risk  whistle:
The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.

Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #11 on: January 28, 2009, 07:41:01 PM »
I had it done in London years ago... Mary Stopes(?)...

The thing I remember most was the doctor chatting alkl through the operation like we were in the pub... just not right somehow...  noooo:

Oh, and the burning smell...  sick2:


I travelled home on the tube and train which was not the most brilliant decision of my life...  eeek:

Oh yes, the pain gets worse!  point:

Yes, the smell is a bit intriguing. Luckily the nurse was distracting me  whistle:

Offline Barman

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #12 on: January 28, 2009, 07:43:09 PM »
I had it done in London years ago... Mary Stopes(?)...

The thing I remember most was the doctor chatting alkl through the operation like we were in the pub... just not right somehow...  noooo:

Oh, and the burning smell...  sick2:


I travelled home on the tube and train which was not the most brilliant decision of my life...  eeek:

Oh yes, the pain gets worse!  point:

Yes, the smell is a bit intriguing. Luckily the nurse was distracting me  whistle:
Burning flesh... yours... she'd have to be dancing around the room naked in high heels  cloud9: to distract me from that...  sick2:
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Offline The Moan Ranger

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #13 on: January 28, 2009, 07:43:53 PM »
It's to stop him licking himself you dolt!

I know hound but unless he is a yoga master or removes a couple of ribs he's pretty safe from that risk  whistle:

Speak for yourself GM  whistle:

Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Diary of "the snip".
« Reply #14 on: January 28, 2009, 07:44:46 PM »
My brother has had it done and my best friends husband ....

Do you want the bad news ....my mates husband had to have it done again last year (2 yrs after the original op) as the tubes had reconnected. Although not looking forward to going through it again the pride of his manhood being so powerful seemed to mitigate his situation somewhat  ::)

Oh and my loutish brother had to take 2 days off work  eeek:

The things you wimmin talk about between yourselves!  ::)

That'll be right cos you're not talking about it here are ya  noooo:

He had private health care - apparently they check these things every year  eeek:
Skubber