The all new TG's gorra job, worra bout you thread

[Darwins Selection]

DS will chase him out of here with a shotgun 

Maybe I'm missing something but I'd have thought that the shotgun would mean that chasing wasnt required. Just give the bugger both barrels 

Don't you watch CSI?

Always shoot them out in the open. . .

[TG]

DS will chase him out of here with a shotgun 

Why? I aint going to execute turnips. I'll let them off with a warning. 

 

[Barman]

That ol' 'back on topic' malarkey didn't last long then...? 

[TG]

That ol' 'back on topic' malarkey didn't last long then...? 

We are on topic. This is about my potential new job laying waste to the countryside whilst dodging shotgun blasts from enraged turnip farmers. 

[TG]

I have just posted my application off for the cow killing job. 

[Darwins Selection]

I have just posted my application off for the cow killing job. 

Cheerio Cherie. 

[TG]

I have just posted my application off for the cow killing job. 

Cheerio Cherie. 

  Would I get a bonus for that do you think?

[Grumpmeister]

Depends on how they do it but I'd say danger money would be a cert for the poor bugger saddles with the tast  if the method of dispatching her is orally administered poison.

[Nick]

Or even

Depends on how they do 't but I`d say danger treasure would be a cert fer th' poor bugger saddles wi' th' tast if th' method o' dispatchin' th' lass' be orally administered poison.

[TG]

Well. A week to go.

I hand over the IT dept for good on Wednesday so I'm hoping they will tell me to feck off after that.

I have organised a massive piss up on Friday night and also invited some old faces from the companies past so that should be good.

It will be an emotional time I imagine. I mean 32 years for gods sake. And some of them have been there longer than me!

After that a new chapter opens. Job hunt goes into high gear. But a few weeks of will be nice. 

[The Moan Ranger]

The very best of luck TG.

[Mrs TG]

Well. A week to go.

I hand over the IT dept for good on Wednesday so I'm hoping they will tell me to feck off after that.

I have organised a massive piss up on Friday night and also invited some old faces from the companies past so that should be good.

It will be an emotional time I imagine. I mean 32 years for gods sake. And some of them have been there longer than me!

After that a new chapter opens. Job hunt goes into high gear. But a few weeks of will be nice. 

And i have a list for you my dear in between your job hunting...

[Barman]

Well. A week to go.

I hand over the IT dept for good on Wednesday so I'm hoping they will tell me to feck off after that.

I have organised a massive piss up on Friday night and also invited some old faces from the companies past so that should be good.

It will be an emotional time I imagine. I mean 32 years for gods sake. And some of them have been there longer than me!

After that a new chapter opens. Job hunt goes into high gear. But a few weeks of will be nice. 

And i have a list for you my dear in between your job hunting...

He's going to be lounging around the house wearing your new leopard skin thong and playing on his new PS3! 

[TG]

 

[TG]

DEFRA just sent me yet another form to fill in.

I have done this and sent it back with the following covering letter :

Dear Cow killers.

I want this job because I enjoy killing.

I also believe that cows are evil and should be purged from the face of the earth.

Also, my friend Mr Icke says that cows are in fact extra-terrestial alligators in disguise. He's a bit of a twat to be honest but sometimes when you look into the cold, calculating eyes of a cow (especially those hairy northern feckers) you have to wonder don't you?

Anywho, gizza job.

Yours Faithfully
Mr T. Gunner.