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Author Topic: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread  (Read 2741 times)

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Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #60 on: July 09, 2022, 12:24:49 AM »
Quote from: Nick on July 08, 2022, 06:29:07 PM
ALso had THREE cop cars and six cops turn up today. This place is in the middle of nowhere!

They marched across to see me

"We are cracking down on illegal anglers!"
Me: You chose a lovely Friday afternoon to do it. Is this a police priority?
Them: The Chief Constable is a keen angler

 noooo:

Damn Nick you missed the perfect opportunity with that set up. All you had to do was sound surprised and ask if they were saying the Chief Constable was an illegal angler  Banghead
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #61 on: July 09, 2022, 04:53:24 PM »
Location Stoke Bardolph Lock

Woman with three children and a dog: "Excuse me but how can we get to the other side of the weir?"
Me: "Drive to Nottingham, cross Trent Bridge, turn left and follow the signs to Radcliffe on Trent"
Her: Is there any other way?
Me: "Drive to Gunthorpe, cross the bridge, turn right and follow the signs to Radcliffe on Trent"
She looks puzzled and I asked her if there was anything else...
Her: "We saw lots of people over there and wondered how they had got across"
Me: "Perhaps they live there"

This made her look thoughtful....
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Offline Steve

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #62 on: July 09, 2022, 05:24:28 PM »
Quote from: Nick on July 09, 2022, 04:53:24 PM
Location Stoke Bardolph Lock

Woman with three children and a dog: "Excuse me but how can we get to the other side of the weir?"
Me: "Drive to Nottingham, cross Trent Bridge, turn left and follow the signs to Radcliffe on Trent"
Her: Is there any other way?
Me: "Drive to Gunthorpe, cross the bridge, turn right and follow the signs to Radcliffe on Trent"
She looks puzzled and I asked her if there was anything else...
Her: "We saw lots of people over there and wondered how they had got across"
Me: "Perhaps they live there"

This made her look thoughtful....
lol: lol: lol:

You should have suggested that pole river jumping.  What could postibly  . . . . .



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Offline Barman

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #63 on: July 09, 2022, 05:52:47 PM »
Quote from: Nick on July 09, 2022, 04:53:24 PM
Location Stoke Bardolph Lock

Woman with three children and a dog: "Excuse me but how can we get to the other side of the weir?"
Me: "Drive to Nottingham, cross Trent Bridge, turn left and follow the signs to Radcliffe on Trent"
Her: Is there any other way?
Me: "Drive to Gunthorpe, cross the bridge, turn right and follow the signs to Radcliffe on Trent"
She looks puzzled and I asked her if there was anything else...
Her: "We saw lots of people over there and wondered how they had got across"
Me: "Perhaps they live there"

This made her look thoughtful....


 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #64 on: July 16, 2022, 04:58:29 PM »
CRT are dong a campaign about the dangers of jumping into rivers so I had both BBC and ITV news crews at me island today!

Got asked questions by one of their reporters who has THE MOST FANTASTIC KNOCKERS eeek: redface:



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Offline Barman

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #65 on: July 16, 2022, 05:51:44 PM »
Quote from: Nick on July 16, 2022, 04:58:29 PM
CRT are dong a campaign about the dangers of jumping into rivers so I had both BBC and ITV news crews at me island today!

Got asked questions by one of their reporters who has THE MOST FANTASTIC KNOCKERS eeek: redface:





(  o  Y  o  )   eyes:
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Offline Steve

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #66 on: July 16, 2022, 06:58:26 PM »
Quote from: Nick on July 16, 2022, 04:58:29 PM
CRT are dong a campaign about the dangers of jumping into rivers so I had both BBC and ITV news crews at me island today!

Got asked questions by one of their reporters who has THE MOST FANTASTIC KNOCKERS eeek: redface:



:thumbsup:
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Offline Uncle Mort

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #67 on: July 16, 2022, 07:54:07 PM »
Quote from: Nick on July 16, 2022, 04:58:29 PM
CRT are dong a campaign about the dangers of jumping into rivers so I had both BBC and ITV news crews at me island today!

Got asked questions by one of their reporters who has THE MOST FANTASTIC KNOCKERS eeek: redface:




Sure that's not an inflated lifejacket.
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #68 on: July 16, 2022, 08:03:18 PM »
If she had turned around suddenly I would have had concussion eeek:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #69 on: July 16, 2022, 09:34:38 PM »
Quote from: Nick on July 16, 2022, 04:58:29 PM
CRT are dong a campaign about the dangers of jumping into rivers so I had both BBC and ITV news crews at me island today!

Got asked questions by one of their reporters who has THE MOST FANTASTIC KNOCKERS eeek: redface:




Did she interview you ... rubschin:
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Offline Barman

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #70 on: July 17, 2022, 03:57:25 AM »
Quote from: Uncle Mort on July 16, 2022, 07:54:07 PM
Quote from: Nick on July 16, 2022, 04:58:29 PM
CRT are dong a campaign about the dangers of jumping into rivers so I had both BBC and ITV news crews at me island today!

Got asked questions by one of their reporters who has THE MOST FANTASTIC KNOCKERS eeek: redface:




Sure that's not an inflated lifejacket.

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #71 on: July 24, 2022, 06:49:20 PM »
Just got home  evil:

What a day.

1. Very windy so I did not expect it to be busy. Instead, constant stream of boats  NickSick

2. A HUGE barge (posh sort) and a posh narrow boat were going through the lock when the Narrow Boat guy let go of a rope. Narrow boat smashed into the barge with a bang that could have shattered windows. Damage to both boats and of course, paperwork from me for CRT to explain what had gone one.

3. Then a lot of shouting. A hydraulic hose burst and sprayed a passing HORSE with hot hydraulic fluid  eeek:  Mass hysteria and NOT my fault

Lock out of action with boats waiting so called the boss. Engineer dispatched to fix problem

Fixed at 7.00  NickSick

Horse had to be hosed down  noooo:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #72 on: July 24, 2022, 08:19:08 PM »
Quote from: Nick on July 24, 2022, 06:49:20 PM
Just got home  evil:

What a day.

1. Very windy so I did not expect it to be busy. Instead, constant stream of boats  NickSick

2. A HUGE barge (posh sort) and a posh narrow boat were going through the lock when the Narrow Boat guy let go of a rope. Narrow boat smashed into the barge with a bang that could have shattered windows. Damage to both boats and of course, paperwork from me for CRT to explain what had gone one.

3. Then a lot of shouting. A hydraulic hose burst and sprayed a passing HORSE with hot hydraulic fluid  eeek:  Mass hysteria and NOT my fault

Lock out of action with boats waiting so called the boss. Engineer dispatched to fix problem

Fixed at 7.00  NickSick

Horse had to be hosed down  noooo:

"NOT my fault" ........... Thumbs:       whistle:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #73 on: July 24, 2022, 08:20:36 PM »
 angel1
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Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Nick's all new 2022 lock keeping adventures and bonkers boaters thread
« Reply #74 on: July 24, 2022, 09:06:12 PM »
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