How lovely...

[Barman]

I just saw a nice little report on TV. Three scenarios: -

1) The main road of a village was blocked due to road maintenance work and they had to take a 12km detour as a result (authorities said that is sufficiently close)

2) The 75W light bulb was outlawed by the EU because it supposedly hurts the environment

3) Smoking is banned in pubs in Bavaria

Solutions:
1) Citizens of the village built their own "illegal" road resulting in a 700m detour instead of 12km. They didn't get a permit for it or anything, bought the material themselves and a local company provided trucks+machines and they built the streets themselves. On the side of the road people from the village put up random sculptures and paintings they owned and they charge a 1 Euro daily entry fee for the "art exhibit" (aka a street toll). They make about 300 Euro/day and will unconstruct the street once the normal one opens again and sell the gravel etc. and actually have made a profit

2) A German company is now selling miniature electronic heating devices. Basically relabelled 75W bulbs, there's no regulations against heating only against light. Some EU guy came and checked on them and told them "lol wtf this is clearly a light bulb...we'll close this ****" and they sent a letter explaining "only idiots would use our heating device as a source of light because it clearly emits more heat than light"...company is running well; nothing EU bureaucrats can do

3) An owner of a pub has relabelled his pub a "public participation theatre" and the only piece they perform is a live re-enactment of "the times before the smoking ban in Bavaria" (similar to the Oberammergauer Passionsspiele) and since smoking is allowed in theatres he is fine (currently being sued by the state of Bavaria)

From Here

More please! 

[Just One More]

I like it, particulalrly number 1. I have a cunning plan, I'll do the specification, Tipsy, can you give me a quote, and no, I don't want white chippings in it

Barman, when you went on that poke-her site, did you think it was gonna be something else? 

[Barman]

I like it, particulalrly number 1. I have a cunning plan, I'll do the specification, Tipsy, can you give me a quote, and no, I don't want white chippings in it

Barman, when you went on that poke-her site, did you think it was gonna be something else?