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Author Topic: I know they call cars penis extensions, but this is ridiculous.  (Read 1227 times)

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Offline Grumpmeister

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I know they call cars penis extensions, but this is ridiculous.
« on: October 27, 2009, 12:18:59 PM »
Whale penis upholstery?  eeek:

Who the hell in their right mind wants their car upholstered with the skin of a whales old chap.  noooo:



Quote
A diamond-encrusted, gold-plated, whale penis-leather fitted 4x4, which also claims to protect its occupants from a rocket grenade attack, is set to go on sale for ?1m.

Marketed at oligarchs with more money than sense, a website promoting the ultra-luxury armoured car promises the Dartz Prombron Monaco Red Diamond Edition is "popular among ladies".

Its clumsily translated slogan reads: "They Drive It. You - Can. They Test It. You - Sure. She Want It. You - Buy."

Along with the Kevlar coating and bullet-proof windows, the 3.7-tonne ruby red vehicle will be able to reach a top speed of 150mph thanks to a 840-horsepower engine.

If that doesn't impress the passenger, then the super-comfy interior, upholstered with the skin of a whale's penis (one of the softest leathers available, apparently), surely will.

Purchasers will also be rewarded with three bottles of the world's most expensive vodka, named after the makers RussoBaltique.

The firm is famous for having built armoured vehicles for Tsar Nicholas, Vladimir Lenin and Leon Trotsky.

It still makes armoured vehicles, and motoring expert Jon Quirk said the Dartz Prombron Monaco Red Diamond Edition would have been devised as a money-spinning pursuit on the side.

"This isn't really a new venture - they're just showing it off as a prototype and will make a limited run of them," he said.

"There is an elite class in Moscow that would quite conceivably afford to spend this much money on such a vehicle."

The Prombron Monaco Red Diamond Edition is set to be revealed at the Top Marques Monaco luxury autos event.

The first potential customer to give the ostentatious vehicle the once-over will be Prince Albert of Monaco, the patron of the forum.

The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.

Offline Barman

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Re: I know they call cars penis extensions, but this is ridiculous.
« Reply #1 on: October 27, 2009, 12:42:39 PM »
If you drive past a whale does the seat inflate like an airbag?  rubschin:
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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: I know they call cars penis extensions, but this is ridiculous.
« Reply #2 on: October 27, 2009, 12:47:43 PM »
On a cold day you can't see over the steering wheel.
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Offline Barman

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Re: I know they call cars penis extensions, but this is ridiculous.
« Reply #3 on: October 27, 2009, 12:48:23 PM »
On a cold day you can't see over the steering wheel.
drumroll:

I was searching for something along those lines...  noooo:
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Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: I know they call cars penis extensions, but this is ridiculous.
« Reply #4 on: October 27, 2009, 12:50:32 PM »
If you drive past a whale does the seat inflate like an airbag?  rubschin:

Only if the sat nav was well and truely buggered.  whistle:

The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.