The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on June 30, 2016, 12:34:26 PM

Title: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on June 30, 2016, 12:34:26 PM
A call floods in. Do I want an interim job in Telford?  rubschin:
Start asap rubschin:
10K a month :thumbsup:

May have to go and see them tomorrow  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on June 30, 2016, 01:08:13 PM
A call floods in. Do I want an interim job in Telford?  rubschin:
Start asap rubschin:
10K a month :thumbsup:

May have to go and see them tomorrow  rubschin:

Wash your hair... ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on June 30, 2016, 01:09:00 PM
I just bleddy did  Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on June 30, 2016, 01:20:53 PM
A call floods in. Do I want an interim job in Telford?  rubschin:
Start asap rubschin:
10K a month :thumbsup:

May have to go and see them tomorrow  rubschin:
:thumbsup:

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on June 30, 2016, 01:22:53 PM
Plus expenses cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 12, 2016, 08:44:43 AM
It's been on/off/on/off and now it's on again. May have to go over there tomorrow rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on July 12, 2016, 01:00:43 PM
Lend us a fiver ...... Thumbs:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 13, 2016, 01:33:22 PM
Monday  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on July 13, 2016, 02:24:52 PM
Monday  :thumbsup:

No it's not...... noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 13, 2016, 02:25:17 PM
But it will be  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on July 13, 2016, 02:41:14 PM
But it will be  :thumbsup:

Next Monday...?  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 13, 2016, 02:43:11 PM
No you clot, this Monday  ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on July 13, 2016, 02:58:32 PM
No you clot, this Monday  ::)

The 11th...?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 13, 2016, 03:05:07 PM
That was last monday you mongulated quad pilot Banghead
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on July 13, 2016, 03:13:08 PM
That was last monday you mongulated quad pilot Banghead

Next Monday, the 18th then...?  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 13, 2016, 03:14:01 PM
Challenge: insert your willy into your arse.
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on July 13, 2016, 04:44:05 PM
Challenge: insert your willy into your arse.

Well that settles it, I am not going to Telford. noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on July 13, 2016, 04:45:33 PM
Challenge: insert your willy into your arse.

Well that settles it, I am not going to Telford. noooo:

Nor me...  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 13, 2016, 04:47:01 PM
It could be a meeting made in Uranus heaven
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on July 13, 2016, 05:02:49 PM
Challenge: insert your willy into your arse.

Well that settles it, I am not going to Telford. noooo:

Nor me...  noooo:
Most definitely  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 18, 2016, 05:56:47 PM
They wanted me to start tomorrow  eeek:

Told them I can start next week. May need to rent a flat there  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on July 18, 2016, 09:50:40 PM
They wanted me to start tomorrow  eeek:

Told them I can start next week. May need to rent a flat there  rubschin:



The boy can drive you .......... Thumbs:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 22, 2016, 03:40:55 PM
An e mail floods in, followed by a phone call. It is my new PA. Her name is Leanne. She "can't wait to meet me". I gather from my informant that she is a divorced laydee of a certain age in the "mutton dressed as lamb" territory. scared2:

Planning to frame a pic of Miss I tomorrow for my desk

 scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on July 22, 2016, 04:19:39 PM
An e mail floods in, followed by a phone call. It is my new PA. Her name is Leanne. She "can't wait to meet me". I gather from my informant that she is a divorced laydee of a certain age in the "mutton dressed as lamb" territory. scared2:

Planning to frame a pic of Miss I tomorrow for my desk

 scared2:
She'll think it's of your daughter and invite you back to see her pictures of her daughter like

Wear pink?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 22, 2016, 04:21:35 PM
 eeek:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on July 23, 2016, 07:30:48 PM
An e mail floods in, followed by a phone call. It is my new PA. Her name is Leanne. She "can't wait to meet me". I gather from my informant that she is a divorced laydee of a certain age in the "mutton dressed as lamb" territory. scared2:

Planning to frame a pic of Miss I tomorrow for my desk

 scared2:
She'll think it's of your daughter and invite you back to see her pictures of her daughter like

Wear pink?

 ;D ;D
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on July 23, 2016, 11:14:14 PM
An e mail floods in, followed by a phone call. It is my new PA. Her name is Leanne. She "can't wait to meet me". I gather from my informant that she is a divorced laydee of a certain age in the "mutton dressed as lamb" territory. scared2:

Planning to frame a pic of Miss I tomorrow for my desk

 scared2:

Sounds like a good plan ...shows your integrity like  lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on July 23, 2016, 11:28:35 PM
An e mail floods in, followed by a phone call. It is my new PA. Her name is Leanne. She "can't wait to meet me". I gather from my informant that she is a divorced laydee of a certain age in the "mutton dressed as lamb" territory. scared2:

Planning to frame a pic of Miss I tomorrow for my desk

 scared2:

The elf pic should work....  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: beerhead on July 24, 2016, 07:34:15 AM
Telford ! I spent a month there one weekend. And when people die in Telford, thy don't bury them, thy stand them up by bus stops. 'orrible place.
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 24, 2016, 07:36:00 AM
Indeed. Fortunately I will be working in Wellington and, I hope, living in Ironbridge  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on July 24, 2016, 09:31:22 AM
Indeed. Fortunately I will be working in Wellington and, I hope, living in Ironbridge  :thumbsup:
Err isn't that a 12,000 mile commute?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on July 24, 2016, 05:02:16 PM
Indeed. Fortunately I will be working in Wellingtons
:thumbsup:

Welcome to my world.

(https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3945/15618225185_a062b9933b_c.jpg)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on July 24, 2016, 07:46:11 PM
Indeed. Fortunately I will be working in Wellingtons
:thumbsup:

Welcome to my world.

(https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3945/15618225185_a062b9933b_c.jpg)

 ;D ;D
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on July 24, 2016, 07:53:19 PM
Indeed. Fortunately I will be working in Wellingtons
:thumbsup:

Welcome to my man's world.

(https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3945/15618225185_a062b9933b_c.jpg)

Amended for accuracy Mr Darwin sir...  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 27, 2016, 03:52:24 PM
Popped in to sort out some practicalities: pass, car park, keys, e mail and so on

Leanne made me a cup of tea and served it with an overgenerous dose of cleavage  scared2: scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on July 27, 2016, 04:15:27 PM
Perhaps she thought you were a right tit and wanted to make you feel at home...  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on July 27, 2016, 04:19:57 PM
Popped in to sort out some practicalities: pass, car park, keys, e mail and so on

Leanne made me a cup of tea and served it with an overgenerous dose of cleavage  scared2: scared2:

Vertigo...?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 27, 2016, 04:24:52 PM
No. My office is on the ground floor.
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on July 27, 2016, 08:29:01 PM
Popped in to sort out some practicalities: pass, car park, keys, e mail and so on

Leanne made me a cup of tea and served it with an overgenerous dose of cleavage  scared2: scared2:

We need more details about the cleavage.  How did it compare say to Carol Kirkwood's?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 28, 2016, 03:24:50 AM
Lovely building. Floodlit all night. Like this one outside my bedroom window. I feel like a bomber pilot over Berlin. And yes, it is 4.00 in the morning  evil:
(https://s31.postimg.org/wocstl2xz/20160728_041418.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/wocstl2xz/)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on July 28, 2016, 06:03:04 AM
Lovely building. Floodlit all night. Like this one outside my bedroom window. I feel like a bomber pilot over Berlin. And yes, it is 4.00 in the morning  evil:
(https://s31.postimg.org/wocstl2xz/20160728_041418.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/wocstl2xz/)

What did you throw...? ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 28, 2016, 06:32:01 AM
 ::)

Right. Time to go eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 29, 2016, 12:47:14 PM
I can confirm that it is very hot inside there, but I was asked to help out, like,


(https://s31.postimg.org/e9g9jf2qv/20160729_132641.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/e9g9jf2qv/)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on July 29, 2016, 01:14:32 PM
I can confirm that it is very hot inside there, but I was asked to help out, like,


(https://s31.postimg.org/e9g9jf2qv/20160729_132641.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/e9g9jf2qv/)

Wrong colour.  ::)

(https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/701471049221853184/a-S70x5Y.jpg)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on July 29, 2016, 01:22:35 PM
I can confirm that it is very hot inside there, but I was asked to help out, like,


(https://s31.postimg.org/e9g9jf2qv/20160729_132641.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/e9g9jf2qv/)

Wrong colour.  ::)

(https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/701471049221853184/a-S70x5Y.jpg)

happy001
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on July 29, 2016, 01:30:30 PM
 cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on July 31, 2016, 11:03:13 PM
I can confirm that it is very hot inside there, but I was asked to help out, like,


(https://s31.postimg.org/e9g9jf2qv/20160729_132641.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/e9g9jf2qv/)

Wrong colour.  ::)

(https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/701471049221853184/a-S70x5Y.jpg)

Don't forget the sound effects Mr Darwin sir, can he borrow your man to carry a bullhorn and yell "MUST GUBBINATE!!!!!! MUST GUBBINATE!!!"  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 01, 2016, 05:35:45 PM
Today I have mainly been dealing with a film crew and some thespians with the help of a Cilla Black lookalikey rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 01, 2016, 05:42:09 PM
Today I have mainly been dealing with a film crew and some thespians with the help of a Cilla Black lookalikey rubschin:


(https://s31.postimg.org/dgvbc7jon/Cilla_ITV.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/dgvbc7jon/)

 rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 01, 2016, 06:32:55 PM
Leanne is off this week (Benidorm  ::)) but another "laydee" has turned up to find out who I am. No wedding ring and another cleavage. "come and visit me sometime". The place is clearly an hotbed  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 01, 2016, 06:40:49 PM
Today I have mainly been dealing with a film crew and some thespians with the help of a Cilla Black lookalikey rubschin:


(https://s31.postimg.org/dgvbc7jon/Cilla_ITV.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/dgvbc7jon/)

 rubschin:
lol: lol: lol:

And now he's turned down two cleavages they will all believe it
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 01, 2016, 06:50:40 PM
Day 4 tomorrow and I am now taking charge  eveilgrin:  Meetings tomorrow with tricky people. I have background stuff  Sinister:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 02, 2016, 06:02:26 AM
Day 4 tomorrow and I am now taking charge  eveilgrin:  Meetings tomorrow with tricky people. I have background stuff  Sinister:

 eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on August 02, 2016, 07:06:38 AM
Day 4 tomorrow and I am now taking charge  eveilgrin:  Meetings tomorrow with tricky people. I have background stuff  Sinister:
noooo:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn.bloody-disgusting.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F08%2Fthe-Wicker-Man-7.jpg&hash=c096319b7d30031ea8177f75fd85cf14b4762569)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 02, 2016, 10:04:24 AM
Day 4 tomorrow and I am now taking charge  eveilgrin:  Meetings tomorrow with tricky people. I have background stuff  Sinister:
noooo:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn.bloody-disgusting.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F08%2Fthe-Wicker-Man-7.jpg&hash=c096319b7d30031ea8177f75fd85cf14b4762569)

 whatimage:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 02, 2016, 10:24:49 AM
Day 4 tomorrow and I am now taking charge  eveilgrin:  Meetings tomorrow with tricky people. I have background stuff  Sinister:
noooo:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn.bloody-disgusting.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F08%2Fthe-Wicker-Man-7.jpg&hash=c096319b7d30031ea8177f75fd85cf14b4762569)
That bad eh?

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 02, 2016, 03:55:59 PM
Nick 1: Hayley 0

 eveilgrin:

(She wasn't expecting that!  Sinister: )
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 02, 2016, 04:37:58 PM
Nick 1: Hayley 0

 eveilgrin:

(She wasn't expecting that!  Sinister: )
Popcorn:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 02, 2016, 04:40:10 PM
Looooooooooooooong story. I have made her do her job in exchange for some vague and empty promises  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 02, 2016, 04:48:22 PM
Looooooooooooooong story. I have made her do her job in exchange for some vague and empty promises  eveilgrin:

 eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 02, 2016, 05:04:59 PM
 eveilgrin: eveilgrin:

So cunningly that she does not realise it.  eveilgrin:  I am a god amongst mongs men
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 02, 2016, 08:45:26 PM
Quote from: Hayley
eveilgrin: eveilgrin:

So cunningly that he believes he has the upper hand.  I have promised to do my job in return for Nick not touching anything that he can wreck.I am a goddess amongst ginger mongs women  eveilgrin:

 rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 03, 2016, 03:56:39 PM
Today a chap I had never met asked me for a light. He then lit this eeek:











(https://s32.postimg.org/glxhw9jj5/20160803_100830.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/glxhw9jj5/)

We then proceeded to herd a swarm of bees that had taken over a room in the college towards his hive  eeek:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on August 03, 2016, 04:05:27 PM
Today a chap I had never met asked me for a light. He then lit this eeek:











(https://s32.postimg.org/glxhw9jj5/20160803_100830.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/glxhw9jj5/)

We then proceeded to herd a swarm of bees that had taken over a room in the college towards his hive  eeek:


If you never met him, how did he ask you for a light?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 03, 2016, 04:08:19 PM
Note the verb tense.  evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on August 03, 2016, 05:02:53 PM
Wossa verb?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 03, 2016, 05:06:16 PM
Wossa verb?

::)

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on August 03, 2016, 05:12:35 PM
Wossa verb?

::)

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/1lyu1KKwC74" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

 :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 03, 2016, 05:14:11 PM
I am surrounded by idiots evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 03, 2016, 05:20:56 PM
I am surrounded by idiots evil:

Wha? Shrugs:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 03, 2016, 06:35:30 PM
a whole day has passed with no cleavage stories.  This is most distapointing

Methinks Nick has made them all dress in Burkas.   noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 03, 2016, 06:37:26 PM
Just had drinks with the numerous other interim heads here. Seems they all think this place is fvcking bonkers. Glad it is not just me. SO much crap to deal with. FUn!!
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 03, 2016, 09:13:48 PM
Today a chap I had never met asked me for a light. He then lit this eeek:











(https://s32.postimg.org/glxhw9jj5/20160803_100830.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/glxhw9jj5/)

We then proceeded to herd a swarm of bees that had taken over a room in the college towards his hive  eeek:


If you never met him, how did he ask you for a light?

Very carefully and from minimum safe distance I expect...  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 04, 2016, 04:13:52 PM
Today I have discovered that the college I am working at is known by TWO DIFFERENT NAMES Banghead Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on August 04, 2016, 04:25:24 PM
Today I have discovered that the college I am working at is known by TWO DIFFERENT NAMES Banghead Banghead Banghead

Well, they would be different wouldn't they...?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 04, 2016, 06:21:16 PM
Today I have discovered that the college I am working at is known by TWO DIFFERENT NAMES Banghead Banghead Banghead

It's a cunning plan....

"Yes I work at [Name A]"
"I say, doesn't that Nick chappie work there? The one they say is a walking disaster area?"
"Oh no, he works at [Name B], nothing to do with us........"
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 04, 2016, 08:33:06 PM
Today I have discovered that the college I am working at is known by TWO DIFFERENT NAMES Banghead Banghead Banghead

It's a cunning plan....

"Yes I work at [Name A]"
"I say, doesn't that Nick chappie work there? The one they say is a walking disaster area?"
"Oh no, he works at [Name B], nothing to do with us........"

 drumroll:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 04, 2016, 08:51:53 PM
Actually the 2 different names could work to your advantage Nick as you could argue it's 2 separate institutions so you should get double pay.......  whistle:





No to start the betting pool on whether or not Nick tries it and what the reaction is...
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on August 04, 2016, 10:03:29 PM
Today I have discovered that the college I am working at is known by TWO DIFFERENT NAMES Banghead Banghead Banghead

Well, they would be different wouldn't they...?
drumroll: drumroll: :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 05, 2016, 05:47:59 PM
Problem: The college has a training restaurant. Excellent review on tripadvisor

Cost: 1.2 million

Opening hours: 12.00 -  1.30 on Fridays (winter months only)
 facepalm:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 05, 2016, 05:51:38 PM
Problem

College runs university level courses

If you want to apply for one, um, you can't.

YOu have to "register your interest". "Someone will call you back"

"Someone" is at her holiday home in Croatia for 2 months and not responding to e mails so you may have to wait for a bit......... facepalm:

I hear she is worried about the lack of students.


SHe is in for a nasty visit from me when she gets back. eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 05, 2016, 05:52:50 PM
Problem: The college has a training restaurant. Excellent review on tripadvisor

Cost: 1.2 million

Opening hours: 12.00 -  1.30 on Fridays (winter months only)
 facepalm:

 noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 05, 2016, 05:53:08 PM
Problem

College runs university level courses

If you want to apply for one, um, you can't.

YOu have to "register your interest". "Someone will call you back"

"Someone" is at her holiday home in Croatia for 2 months and not responding to e mails so you may have to wait for a bit......... facepalm:

I hear she is worried about the lack of students.


SHe is in for a nasty visit from me when she gets back. eveilgrin:

 eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 05, 2016, 05:55:55 PM
Problem

College runs university level courses

If you want to apply for one, um, you can't.

YOu have to "register your interest". "Someone will call you back"

"Someone" is at her holiday home in Croatia for 2 months and not responding to e mails so you may have to wait for a bit......... facepalm:

I hear she is worried about the lack of students.


SHe is in for a nasty visit from me when she gets back. eveilgrin:

 eveilgrin:
I have taken the stoopid system off line and have ordered Admissions to admit anyone (for interview) who can spell their own name  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 05, 2016, 06:01:46 PM
Problem

College runs university level courses

If you want to apply for one, um, you can't.

YOu have to "register your interest". "Someone will call you back"

"Someone" is at her holiday home in Croatia for 2 months and not responding to e mails so you may have to wait for a bit......... facepalm:

I hear she is worried about the lack of students.


SHe is in for a nasty visit from me when she gets back. eveilgrin:

 eveilgrin:
I have taken the stoopid system off line and have ordered Admissions to admit anyone (for interview) who can spell their own name  eveilgrin:

 rubschin:

I can spell my name!  inane:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 05, 2016, 06:26:22 PM
Problem

College runs university level courses

If you want to apply for one, um, you can't.

YOu have to "register your interest". "Someone will call you back"

"Someone" is at her holiday home in Croatia for 2 months and not responding to e mails so you may have to wait for a bit......... facepalm:

I hear she is worried about the lack of students.


SHe is in for a nasty visit from me when she gets back. eveilgrin:

 eveilgrin:
I have taken the stoopid system off line and have ordered Admissions to admit anyone (for interview) who can spell their own name  eveilgrin:

 rubschin:

I can spell my name!  inane:

That's good to hear, we were all getting worried about you when you seemed convinced your name was MB...  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 05, 2016, 06:28:16 PM
Problem

College runs university level courses

If you want to apply for one, um, you can't.

YOu have to "register your interest". "Someone will call you back"

"Someone" is at her holiday home in Croatia for 2 months and not responding to e mails so you may have to wait for a bit......... facepalm:

I hear she is worried about the lack of students.


SHe is in for a nasty visit from me when she gets back. eveilgrin:

 eveilgrin:
I have taken the stoopid system off line and have ordered Admissions to admit anyone (for interview) who can spell their own name  eveilgrin:
:thumbsup:

Incl applicants for Fuckwit of Croatia (at times)'s job

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 05, 2016, 06:33:46 PM
 :thumbsup: eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 05, 2016, 06:36:47 PM
Problem

College runs university level courses

If you want to apply for one, um, you can't.

YOu have to "register your interest". "Someone will call you back"

"Someone" is at her holiday home in Croatia for 2 months and not responding to e mails so you may have to wait for a bit......... facepalm:

I hear she is worried about the lack of students.


SHe is in for a nasty visit from me when she gets back. eveilgrin:

 eveilgrin:
I have taken the stoopid system off line and have ordered Admissions to admit anyone (for interview) who can spell their own name  eveilgrin:
:thumbsup:

Incl applicants for Fuckwit of Croatia (at times)'s job

 rubschin:

Does it pay more than 50 per hour or part thereof...?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 05, 2016, 06:41:32 PM
Mine does  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 05, 2016, 06:44:07 PM
Mine does  whistle:

Where do I sign...?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on August 05, 2016, 10:46:48 PM
Mine does  whistle:

Where do I sign...?
X
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 05, 2016, 10:56:32 PM
Mine does  whistle:

Where do I sign...?
X

X marks the clot you say...  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 06, 2016, 04:51:19 AM
Mine does  whistle:

Where do I sign...?
X

X marks the clot you say...  rubschin:

 evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Miss Creant on August 06, 2016, 10:28:36 AM
Indeed. Fortunately I will be working in Wellington and, I hope, living in Ironbridge  :thumbsup:

Most excellent.  I used to live in Much Wenlock you are in my old stamping ground.  I shall be down for a visit directly, just to show you around like.

I promise not to show you my cleavage in exchange for being taken up the  funicular in Bridgnorth.

http://www.bridgnorthcliffrailway.co.uk/ (http://www.bridgnorthcliffrailway.co.uk/)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 06, 2016, 02:07:12 PM
 eeek:

I may have to take you up the Wrekin instead........ rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 07, 2016, 03:05:17 PM
Prepping for tomorrow. Blood will be shed this week and it will not be mine  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 07, 2016, 03:15:00 PM
Popcorn:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on August 07, 2016, 09:50:16 PM
Prepping for tomorrow. Blood will be shed this week and it will not be mine  eveilgrin:

LL checks BM's cleaning ... rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 08, 2016, 01:01:42 AM
Prepping for tomorrow. Blood will be shed this week and it will not be mine  eveilgrin:

LL checks BM's cleaning ... rubschin:

Would explain why Baldymort has been practising the phrase "Apey made me do it" the last couple of days.......   rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 09, 2016, 04:37:48 PM
Another manic and bonkers day. Tomorrow me and Leanne have requisitioned one of the pool cars (they seem to have a fleet!) and we are setting off on a day long jaunt.
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 09, 2016, 05:32:40 PM
Another manic and bonkers day. Tomorrow me and Leanne have requisitioned one of the pool cars (they seem to have a fleet!) and we are setting off on a day long jaunt.

Leanne and I... ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on August 09, 2016, 06:35:44 PM
Another manic and bonkers day. Tomorrow me and Leanne have requisitioned one of the pool cars (they seem to have a fleet!) and we are setting off on a day long jaunt.

Leanne and I... ::)

No Nick..... ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 09, 2016, 06:56:24 PM
Another manic and bonkers day. Tomorrow me and Leanne have requisitioned one of the pool cars (they seem to have a fleet!) and we are setting off on a day long jaunt.
Have you got your back quack on standby?

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 11, 2016, 05:32:40 PM
Ring ring

Hello Mr Nick, it is me (journalist from the Times Ed Supplement, I know him)
Me: How are you and why are you calling me?
Him: Well, we are running a story tomorrow about how crap your college is and we wanted a comment. We need it in an hour.
Me: I will see
Click

I call the Principal (standard procedure)
She is in Crete

Her: Tell him to fuck off (click)

I set my e mail to out of office and answer no further calls
He gets the hint.



 NickSick
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 14, 2016, 02:15:02 PM
Back at the Wrekin. Tricky window. Needed first aid  sad24: sad24: sad24:

Right hand, fortunately  angel1 whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: TG on August 14, 2016, 02:27:04 PM
i am in telford next week.

Is it safe?

 scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 14, 2016, 02:31:37 PM
 eeek:

Which bit? And which hotel?  scared2: scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: TG on August 14, 2016, 02:44:15 PM
erm..  I Forget....  whistle:

Actually just passing through type thing. On way to somewhere else or other...

 Thumbs:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on August 14, 2016, 05:45:45 PM
erm..  I Forget....  whistle:

Actually just passing through type thing. On way to somewhere else or other...

 Thumbs:

Better swerve than Vardy....... Thumbs:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on August 14, 2016, 10:28:34 PM
Back at the Wrekin. Tricky window. Needed first aid  sad24: sad24: sad24:

Right hand, fortunately  angel1 whistle:

Lucky you.

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 14, 2016, 11:07:09 PM
Back at the Wrekin. Tricky window. Needed first aid  sad24: sad24: sad24:

Right hand, fortunately  angel1 whistle:

Lucky you.

I think I may be starting to understand at least part of Nick's uncanny ability to cause chaos and carnage, a leftie trying to use his right hand for everything...  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2016, 01:20:42 PM
Attention all staff and visitors

Our contractors have now completed laying tarmac on the main site entrance road.

Unfortunately until it sets no on can enter or leave the site in a vehicle











 facepalm:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2016, 01:27:56 PM
Return to hotel to do some work in a quiet environment. The man in the next room is doing his trumpet practice Banghead Banghead Banghead

Can't go back to work cos the college is cut off in a sea of wet tarmac  Banghead
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on August 16, 2016, 01:38:41 PM
Well simples solution ...you will have to work in a noisy environment  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2016, 01:42:41 PM
 Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on August 16, 2016, 11:37:32 PM
Attention all staff and visitors

Our contractors have now completed laying tarmac on the main site entrance road.

Unfortunately until it sets no on can enter or leave the site in a vehicle











 facepalm:

Bitmac...... ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 18, 2016, 05:18:25 PM
I see that Nick's suggestion about renaming the college was taken on board....  noooo:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.dailymail.co.uk%2Fi%2Fpix%2F2016%2F08%2F18%2F10%2F375B0BC500000578-3746715-image-a-2_1471513046030.jpg&hash=767c2a4d0215d1a208e17123d919f5d1571c2135)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 18, 2016, 05:46:21 PM
Too close to the truth in this place!!
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 19, 2016, 05:07:40 AM
Two meetings today where I may have to kill the other party, then home until Sunday. Possible visit from Miss I  cloud9: cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 19, 2016, 05:53:22 AM
Two meetings today where I may have to kill the other party, then home until Sunday. Possible visit from Miss I  cloud9: cloud9:

 Jail:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 19, 2016, 09:47:02 AM
Is Ms Admissions still in Croatia?

This being peak trawling for admissions Friday like
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 19, 2016, 05:17:10 PM
Head of the unversity centre showed up Wednesday and said, "Can we have a big campaign for the A level results tomorrow?"  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead

Did she not know that A level results day has been the same since I took mine in 1973??  cussing: cussing:

I gave her a very satisfying blow torching this morning  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 22, 2016, 03:57:11 PM
Everyone in this fvcking place is an idiot Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Angry9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 22, 2016, 04:10:36 PM
Everyone in this fvcking place is an idiot Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Angry9:

I couldn't possibly comment....  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 22, 2016, 05:15:22 PM
Everyone in this fvcking place is an idiot Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Angry9:

I couldn't possibly comment....  whistle:

Break out the black suits, BM is feeling ill...  scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 23, 2016, 05:53:58 AM
Steam from my shower activated the fire alarm. Whole hotel evacuated at 6.35 a.m.  redface: redface: redface:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 23, 2016, 06:00:49 AM
Steam from my shower activated the fire alarm. Whole hotel evacuated at 6.35 a.m.  redface: redface: redface:

facepalm:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 23, 2016, 09:38:26 AM
Steam from my shower activated the fire alarm. Whole hotel evacuated at 6.35 a.m.  redface: redface: redface:

facepalm:
happy001
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 23, 2016, 04:02:50 PM
Saw the SUpreme Leader this afternoon. "Some clot set off the fire alarm in my hotel at 6.30 this morning, " she raged redface: redface: redface: redface:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 23, 2016, 05:15:17 PM
Saw the SUpreme Leader this afternoon. "Some clot set off the fire alarm in my hotel at 6.30 this morning, " she raged redface: redface: redface: redface:

Thinks opportunity

Borrow us a fiver or we grass on you
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 23, 2016, 08:10:12 PM
Saw the SUpreme Leader this afternoon. "Some clot set off the fire alarm in my hotel at 6.30 this morning, " she raged redface: redface: redface: redface:

Thinks opportunity

Borrow us a fiver or we grass on you

And borrow me five too like....  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 23, 2016, 08:13:14 PM
Have been asked to stay on for longer on account of the fact that I am so wonderful cloud9:

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 23, 2016, 08:14:59 PM
Have been asked to stay on for longer on account of the fact that I am so wonderful cloud9:



You can pay off Uncle's bar bill... it is what he would have wanted like...  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 23, 2016, 08:17:17 PM
2.23, you say?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 23, 2016, 08:19:44 PM
2.23, you say?

223.00  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 23, 2016, 08:25:15 PM
I will shout that into his coffin, just in case he is being buried alive, like  angel1

I guess he will take the burial alive option

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 26, 2016, 07:38:33 PM
Sam the guard tells me there is guy who works for me who touches his car bonnet  each morning when he arrives in the car park.

Sam asked him why. The chap said, "If it is hot I have to go to work.If it is cold it is time to go home."

This is what I am working with.
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 27, 2016, 06:34:02 AM
Sam the guard tells me there is guy who works for me who touches his car bonnet  each morning when he arrives in the car park.

Sam asked him why. The chap said, "If it is hot I have to go to work.If it is cold it is time to go home."

This is what I am working with.

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 30, 2016, 05:18:00 PM
All the "academic" staff are in tomorrow  noooo:

I am warned it will be Bedlam. Well they can fuck right off eveilgrin:

Meanwhile, Miss I is having some kind of crisis and I have spent 2 hours on and off doing Skype counselling and revising her (impressive) CV (6 languages including Ancient Greek  eeek:)

I am already  NickSick
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 30, 2016, 06:34:29 PM
Mr OAP charabanc trip? Meet Mr Karaoke night  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on August 30, 2016, 07:20:19 PM
Miss I is having some kind of crisis and I have spent 2 hours on and off doing Skype counselling

They can be a nightmare towards the end of the first trimester. noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 30, 2016, 07:26:16 PM
 eeek:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 30, 2016, 07:32:20 PM
eeek:

 point:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 30, 2016, 07:34:59 PM
 evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 30, 2016, 07:48:39 PM
Miss I is having some kind of crisis and I have spent 2 hours on and off doing Skype counselling

They can be a nightmare towards the end of the first trimester. noooo:
happy001
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 30, 2016, 07:52:59 PM
 evil: evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 30, 2016, 08:43:10 PM
Seems you missed a terrific day to be in Nottingham

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/live/cricket/36893156 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/live/cricket/36893156)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 31, 2016, 05:18:22 AM
Seems you missed a terrific day to be in Nottingham

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/live/cricket/36893156 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/live/cricket/36893156)

 :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 31, 2016, 05:00:37 PM
My contract has been extended  cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on August 31, 2016, 05:43:31 PM
My contract has been extended  cloud9:
:thumbsup:

One of Scott Adams' (Dilbert author) great pieces of business wisdom:

"The first duty of a consultant is to get their contract extended"
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 31, 2016, 06:32:36 PM
 :thumbsup: eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on August 31, 2016, 06:49:00 PM
My contract has been extended  cloud9:
:thumbsup:

One of Scott Adams' (Dilbert author) great pieces of business wisdom:

"The first duty of a consultant is to get their contract extended"

happy001
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on August 31, 2016, 06:50:04 PM
I win  cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 01, 2016, 04:08:36 PM
New Head of Sport arrives and finds guy in a wheelchair doing something or other in the gym. Asks for his student badge. Not a student. Promptly bans him from the campus. WHo is this chap, you ask?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-29150054 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-29150054)

 facepalm: facepalm: facepalm:

Guess who is now having to respond to numerous enquiries from the media  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 01, 2016, 04:12:22 PM
New Head of Sport arrives and finds guy in a wheelchair doing something or other in the gym. Asks for his student badge. Not a student. Promptly bans him from the campus. WHo is this chap, you ask?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-29150054 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-29150054)

 facepalm: facepalm: facepalm:

Guess who is now having to respond to numerous enquiries from the media  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
point:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 01, 2016, 04:29:23 PM
New Head of Sport arrives and finds guy in a wheelchair doing something or other in the gym. Asks for his student badge. Not a student. Promptly bans him from the campus. WHo is this chap, you ask?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-29150054 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-29150054)

 facepalm: facepalm: facepalm:

Guess who is now having to respond to numerous enquiries from the media  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
point:

happy001
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 01, 2016, 04:51:59 PM
And now my boss has accidentally forwarded another email in which I called someone "a cash grasping clown" to the cash grasping clown. Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 01, 2016, 05:02:44 PM
And now my boss has accidentally forwarded another email in which I called someone "a cash grasping clown" to the cash grasping clown. Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead

 point:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 01, 2016, 05:04:54 PM
New Head of Sport arrives and finds guy in a wheelchair doing something or other in the gym. Asks for his student badge. Not a student. Promptly bans him from the campus. WHo is this chap, you ask?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-29150054 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-29150054)

 facepalm: facepalm: facepalm:

Guess who is now having to respond to numerous enquiries from the media  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
point:

happy001
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 01, 2016, 05:06:20 PM
I am surrounded by idiots  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 01, 2016, 07:21:16 PM
I am surrounded by idiots  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
For once we believe you.
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 01, 2016, 10:11:26 PM
And now my boss has accidentally forwarded another email in which I called someone "a cash grasping clown" to the cash grasping clown. Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead

 point:
point: point:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 02, 2016, 08:23:32 AM
And now my boss has accidentally forwarded another email in which I called someone "a cash grasping clown" to the cash grasping clown. Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead

 point:
point: point:

'Accidentally' you say....  point: point: point: 
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 02, 2016, 08:35:05 AM
And now my boss has accidentally forwarded another email in which I called someone "a cash grasping clown" to the cash grasping clown. Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead

 point:
point: point:

'Accidentally' you say....  point: point: point:
Exactly


(https://s21.postimg.org/d6j3fx96r/clown_puppet.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/d6j3fx96r/)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 02, 2016, 05:54:44 PM
The nutters are all crawling out of the woodwork. Went to see Head of Childcare today  noooo:
She commented on my phone and then explained that all the techy development of the last 50 years was brought to us in UFOs. Pyramids also cropped up. I asked if the aliens got anything in return and she said they got human body parts. She then claimed to have met "Mr NASA" once, an alien robot disguised as an American.

I ended the meeting noooo:

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on September 02, 2016, 06:55:30 PM
The nutters are all crawling out of the woodwork. Went to see Head of Childcare today  noooo:
She commented on my phone and then explained that all the techy development of the last 50 years was brought to us in UFOs. Pyramids also cropped up. I asked if the aliens got anything in return and she said they got human body parts. She then claimed to have met "Mr NASA" once, an alien robot disguised as an American.

I ended the meeting noooo:



And then I woke up...
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 02, 2016, 06:58:21 PM
 noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 02, 2016, 07:45:19 PM
It's been very quiet on the cleavage front lately

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 02, 2016, 07:46:41 PM
She has legs up to her arse but I am too busy to deal with that stuff noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 02, 2016, 08:18:27 PM
She has legs up to her arse but I am too busy to deal with that stuff noooo:

Gayer:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 02, 2016, 08:23:57 PM
Miss I  evil: cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 03, 2016, 02:00:35 PM
A member of staff accused me of being "politically incorrect" yesterday. I am thrilled cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 03, 2016, 02:01:28 PM
A member of staff accused me of being "politically incorrect" yesterday. I am thrilled cloud9:

 Thumbs:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 03, 2016, 02:04:04 PM
She teaches Social Werkers  ::) eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on September 03, 2016, 04:50:50 PM
A member of staff accused me of being "politically incorrect" yesterday. I am thrilled cloud9:

Bet it was a coon........ noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 03, 2016, 05:04:40 PM
Nah, wumman with PMT  angel1
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 04, 2016, 04:58:15 PM
Up the Wrekin and getting set for another week of bonkersness noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 04, 2016, 07:46:39 PM
A member of staff accused me of being "politically incorrect" yesterday. I am thrilled cloud9:

Bet it was a coon........ noooo:

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2016, 04:10:36 PM
An utterly bonkers day with a whole new breed of complete nutters  noooo: noooo: noooo: noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2016, 04:22:56 PM
Seems the hotel has double booked itself with pensioners' coach parties and they are all having to share rooms with strangers. This includes double rooms  eeek: eyes:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2016, 04:27:25 PM
Revenge on Frieda

Looking at free giveaways we received a really nice selection box of branded flash drives. Lovely objects.

Eager to get revenge on the horrid Frieda I picked two out and wandered into her office.

"Flash drives. This one is embedded in wood and this on in leather. Which one would you like?"

"Ooh, leather please."

(This tells me all I need to know about her sex life  noooo:)

I give her the leather one. "Thank you SO much," says she.

I failed to tell her that all the samples are useless dummies  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 08, 2016, 05:22:52 PM
Revenge on Frieda

Looking at free giveaways we received a really nice selection box of branded flash drives. Lovely objects.

Eager to get revenge on the horrid Frieda I picked two out and wandered into her office.

"Flash drives. This one is embedded in wood and this on in leather. Which one would you like?"

"Ooh, leather please."

(This tells me all I need to know about her sex life  noooo:)

I give her the leather one. "Thank you SO much," says she.

I failed to tell her that all the samples are useless dummies  eveilgrin:

happy001
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2016, 05:31:56 PM
Mairead comes in for a photo.

She has an Irish accent.

I say, "Ooh, you are Irish! Where from?"

She says, "Ireland."

 facepalm:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 08, 2016, 05:56:27 PM
Mairead comes in for a photo.

She has an Irish accent.

I say, "Ooh, you are Irish! Where from?"

She says, "Ireland."

 facepalm:

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 08, 2016, 08:51:01 PM
Mairead comes in for a photo.

She has an Irish accent.

I say, "Ooh, you are Irish! Where from?"

She says, "Ireland."

 facepalm:

 lol: lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol: lol:

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on September 08, 2016, 08:55:40 PM
Mairead comes in for a photo.

She has an Irish accent.

I say, "Ooh, you are Irish! Where from?"

She says, "Ireland."

 facepalm:

Well...it was a stupid question from you...what did you expect... noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 09, 2016, 05:23:53 AM
 evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 09, 2016, 08:05:16 AM
evil:

 point:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 12, 2016, 04:19:35 PM
I am homeless for tomorrow night  sad24:

Every hotel for miles around is full and one is advertising its one remaining room for 400 eeek:

Why? SOme sort of farm show and a convention of milk farmers  cussing:

I have found a hotel in Wolverhampton evil: Or a caravan (Tipsy stylee) in the middle of a field  evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 12, 2016, 04:24:59 PM
I am homeless for tomorrow night  sad24:

Every hotel for miles around is full and one is advertising its one remaining room for 400 eeek:

Why? SOme sort of farm show and a convention of milk farmers  cussing:

I have found a hotel in Wolverhampton evil: Or a caravan (Tipsy stylee) in the middle of a field  evil:

 point:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 12, 2016, 04:40:46 PM
http://www.booking.com/hotel/gb/shepherds-hut.en-gb.html?aid=339530;label=2978_cartabandon_ufi-name_v2-;sid=13d5759bd3dc198866ac9230ba755b85;checkin=2016-09-13&checkout=2016-09-14&dist=0&sb_price_type=total&type=total& (http://www.booking.com/hotel/gb/shepherds-hut.en-gb.html?aid=339530;label=2978_cartabandon_ufi-name_v2-;sid=13d5759bd3dc198866ac9230ba755b85;checkin=2016-09-13&checkout=2016-09-14&dist=0&sb_price_type=total&type=total&)

 rubschin: rubschin: rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 12, 2016, 04:44:40 PM
http://www.booking.com/hotel/gb/shepherds-hut.en-gb.html?aid=339530;label=2978_cartabandon_ufi-name_v2-;sid=13d5759bd3dc198866ac9230ba755b85;checkin=2016-09-13&checkout=2016-09-14&dist=0&sb_price_type=total&type=total& (http://www.booking.com/hotel/gb/shepherds-hut.en-gb.html?aid=339530;label=2978_cartabandon_ufi-name_v2-;sid=13d5759bd3dc198866ac9230ba755b85;checkin=2016-09-13&checkout=2016-09-14&dist=0&sb_price_type=total&type=total&)

 rubschin: rubschin: rubschin:

118!  Shocked:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 12, 2016, 04:46:00 PM
It is all that is left  sad24:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 12, 2016, 04:50:50 PM
It is all that is left  sad24:

Expenses!  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 12, 2016, 04:52:40 PM
 :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 12, 2016, 05:13:39 PM
:thumbsup: :thumbsup:

Stay in the 400 then... ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 12, 2016, 05:17:02 PM
I am homeless for tomorrow night  sad24:

Every hotel for miles around is full and one is advertising its one remaining room for 400 eeek:

Why? SOme sort of farm show and a convention of milk farmers  cussing:

I have found a hotel in Wolverhampton evil: Or a caravan (Tipsy stylee) in the middle of a field  evil:

"Good afternoon and thank you for caling the <insert name here> Hotel, how may I help you?"
"I'd like to book a room for the night"
"No problem sir, I'll just look and see what's available, can I get your name please"
"Nick"
".......................Ah, I'm sorry sir there doesn't appear to be a free room for tonight I'm afraid"
"Is there some kind of event or convention going on, all the hotels seem to be full tonight?"
"Not that I know of sir, sorry I couldn't help"
"Okay, thanks anyway" [Nick hangs up]
"Phew, that was close. Let the manager know he isn't coming here either"

 rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 12, 2016, 05:17:46 PM
 evil: evil: evil: evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 12, 2016, 07:17:43 PM
I'm sure one of the Ms Cleavages would put you up for the night so to speak
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2016, 05:21:53 PM
Went to Wolverhampton University for a meeting this arvo. As I feared, they are a bunch of muppets  cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2016, 07:57:53 PM
DInner at a Golf Club. Hysterical. All clients male, pompous middle aged slapheads apart from me and one terrifying lesbian with a shaven head.

All staff on verge of hysteria.

Pretentious menu. I asked what Panko breadcrumbs are. Waitress reported it is Japanese bread. I asked if it was flown in specially.

Almost all cars in the car park have personalised number plates. I informed the manager that henceforth I would be known as EO03KZH (Deed Poll cheaper than DVLA).
03 for short will do  angel1
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 13, 2016, 08:04:34 PM
DInner at a Golf Club. Hysterical. All clients male, pompous middle aged slapheads apart from me and one terrifying lesbian with a shaven head.

All staff on verge of hysteria.

Pretentious menu. I asked what Panko breadcrumbs are. Waitress reported it is Japanese bread. I asked if it was flown in specially.

Almost all cars in the car park have personalised number plates. I informed the manager that henceforth I would be known as EO03KZH (Deed Poll cheaper than DVLA).
03 for short will do  angel1
:thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 15, 2016, 03:54:22 PM
Union rep: I see you around a lot but I don't know who you are
Me: New Interim Director of Marketing
UCU rep: Ah, the Josef Goebbels of TCAT!

 cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 15, 2016, 04:12:42 PM
The cat's a gerbil ???

Blimey  lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 15, 2016, 04:15:17 PM
 Spank2: Spank2: Spank2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on September 15, 2016, 06:57:39 PM
The cat's a gerbil ???

Blimey  lol:

 happy002 happy002
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 18, 2016, 01:03:16 PM
The hotel I am in this week is quite nice and is, weirdly, owned by the local 6th form college!!

It has a pool and spa.

I have Speedos and I am not afraid to use them  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 18, 2016, 01:06:10 PM
The hotel I am in this week is quite nice and is, weirdly, owned by the local 6th form college!!

It has a pool and spa.

I have Speedos and I am not afraid to use them  eveilgrin:

facepalm:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 18, 2016, 02:52:42 PM
The hotel I am in this week is quite nice and is, weirdly, owned by the local 6th form college!!

It has a pool and spa.

I have Speedos and I am not afraid to use them  eveilgrin:

facepalm:
doublefacepalm
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 18, 2016, 03:29:39 PM
The hotel I am in this week is quite nice and is, weirdly, owned by the local 6th form college!!

It has a pool and spa.

I have Speedos and I am not afraid to use them  eveilgrin:

Those poor buggers, having to endure the trauma of the sight of Nick in Speedos...  eeek:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 19, 2016, 06:59:01 AM
Another strange discovery at breakfast ...............
(https://s12.postimg.org/lbsp30n0p/20160919_074358.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/lbsp30n0p/)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 19, 2016, 09:43:29 AM
Another strange discovery at breakfast ...............
(https://s12.postimg.org/lbsp30n0p/20160919_074358.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/lbsp30n0p/)
eeek:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 19, 2016, 01:03:55 PM
Another strange discovery at breakfast ...............
(https://s12.postimg.org/lbsp30n0p/20160919_074358.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/lbsp30n0p/)

 whatimage:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 19, 2016, 01:30:30 PM
Another strange discovery at breakfast ...............
(https://s12.postimg.org/lbsp30n0p/20160919_074358.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/lbsp30n0p/)

 whatimage:

I could see it earlier but it is gone gubbed now...

Nick appeared to have found a football pitch in his breakfast...  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 19, 2016, 02:30:44 PM
Another strange discovery at breakfast ...............
(https://s12.postimg.org/lbsp30n0p/20160919_074358.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/lbsp30n0p/)

 whatimage:

I could see it earlier but it is gone gubbed now...

Nick appeared to have found a football pitch in his breakfast...  noooo:
Nick's destroyed a whole football pitch.  Is this a record?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 19, 2016, 04:30:16 PM
What kind of weird hotel is actually named in honour of famous local resident Mary WHitehouse?? eeek:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 19, 2016, 08:26:24 PM
What kind of weird hotel is actually named in honour of famous local resident Mary WHitehouse?? eeek:
Just a wild guess but maybe one with no pay per view smut on the room telebox?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 19, 2016, 08:36:33 PM
What kind of weird hotel is actually named in honour of famous local resident Mary WHitehouse?? eeek:
Just a wild guess but maybe one with no pay per view smut on the room telebox?

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 20, 2016, 05:36:17 AM
 ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 20, 2016, 11:16:18 AM
What kind of weird hotel is actually named in honour of famous local resident Mary WHitehouse?? eeek:

Does it only have single rooms ???
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on September 20, 2016, 11:34:09 AM
What kind of weird hotel is actually named in honour of famous local resident Mary WHitehouse?? eeek:

Does it only have single rooms ???

 lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 20, 2016, 03:15:12 PM
More Dalek related fun today  ::) and a nightmare problem with a BBC journo who had uncovered something which, had it been true, would have been catastrophically awful. Managed to head her off but back at the Whitehouse tuned into Radio news just in case, like  scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 21, 2016, 06:35:18 AM
Off to werk and then home and then Scunthorpe and then Hull and then home and then back here again  NickSick
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 21, 2016, 04:47:11 PM
Off to werk and then home and then Scunthorpe and then Hull and then home and then back here again  NickSick
The phrase "bloody hell, what a trek?" comes to mind

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 21, 2016, 06:16:18 PM
Nottingham  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 21, 2016, 06:23:17 PM
Off to werk and then home and then Scunthorpe and then Hull and then home and then back here again  NickSick
The phrase "bloody hell, what a trek?" comes to mind

It's illogical Jim...  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 22, 2016, 03:29:05 PM
President of Student Council elected today  :thumbsup:

Intelligent and articulate 19 year old  :thumbsup:

Student Council promotes British Values and democracy  :thumbsup:

Staff alarmed he is a UKIP supporter and want to oust him  noooo:






















 eveilgrin:


Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 22, 2016, 04:08:11 PM
President of Student Council elected today  :thumbsup:

Intelligent and articulate 19 year old  :thumbsup:

Student Council promotes British Values and democracy  :thumbsup:

Staff alarmed he is a UKIP supporter and want to oust him  noooo:

 eveilgrin:
An interesting symbol on their web site might be for the chop then 

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 22, 2016, 04:48:36 PM
Meanwhile some tosser has used pics of a female Muslim student as an ad on the inside of male toilet cubicle doors at the local bowling alley  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead


 shitstorm: shitstorm: shitstorm: shitstorm:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 22, 2016, 04:55:32 PM
Meanwhile some tosser has used pics of a female Muslim student as an ad on the inside of male toilet cubicle doors at the local bowling alley  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead


 shitstorm: shitstorm: shitstorm: shitstorm:
lol:

An ad for what?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 22, 2016, 05:01:32 PM
 kleenex:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 22, 2016, 06:50:39 PM
kleenex:
Moves 5 from . . . . but thought ought to check

Was she aware of this?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 22, 2016, 06:55:43 PM
 noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 22, 2016, 07:20:27 PM
So a criminal offence then

I'd say Popcorn: but this sounds like someone is being a nasty piece of work and some poor girl is never going to get over this.   noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 22, 2016, 07:22:48 PM
She signed a release form but did not expect to end up as wank fodder in a men's bog noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 22, 2016, 07:32:38 PM
She signed a release form but did not expect to end up as wank fodder in a men's bog noooo:

Desperately sad.   I've got nowt clever to say on this but it's not one to joke over.  Hope she's OK
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 23, 2016, 06:43:11 AM
She signed a release form but did not expect to end up as wank fodder in a men's bog noooo:

"release form" *snigger*  redface:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 23, 2016, 08:44:49 AM
She signed a release form but did not expect to end up as wank fodder in a men's bog noooo:

"release form" *snigger*  redface:
drumroll:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: The Moan Ranger on September 24, 2016, 07:48:48 PM
She signed a release form but did not expect to end up as wank fodder in a men's bog noooo:

"release form" *snigger*  redface:

Child  ::)

But  lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Tipsy Gipsy on September 25, 2016, 04:46:34 PM
I am homeless for tomorrow night sad24:

Every hotel for miles around is full and one is advertising its one remaining room for 400 eeek:

Why? SOme sort of farm show and a convention of milk farmers  cussing:

I have found a hotel in Wolverhampton evil: Or a caravan (Tipsy stylee) in the middle of a field  evil:

Oh Nick .... have only just seen this.. what a pity you could have stayed with me.   whistle:









 happy001

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 25, 2016, 04:50:57 PM
 cloud9: cloud9: cloud9:





































 evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Tipsy Gipsy on September 25, 2016, 05:07:00 PM
 angel1
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 26, 2016, 08:50:12 AM
WOrking at "the office" (unpaid evil: ) on something with a noon deadline. All the people I need info from are in a meeting till 11.30 angry041: angry041:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on September 26, 2016, 11:08:38 AM
WOrking at "the office" (unpaid evil: ) on something with a noon deadline. All the people I need info from are in a meeting till 11.30 angry041: angry041:

Just make it all up then.  Seemples
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 26, 2016, 01:40:40 PM
And this week I have booked myself into two different hotels  evil:

And my cleaners have texted to tell me that the suits I collected earlier both have the wrong trousers with them  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 26, 2016, 04:06:24 PM
And this week I have booked myself into two different hotels  evil:

And my cleaners have texted to tell me that the suits I collected earlier both have the wrong trousers with them  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpreviewcf.turbosquid.com%2FPreview%2F2014%2F05%2F26__13_27_44%2FPicture%25203.png41703641-5069-464d-b313-2632b4939ea3Larger.jpg&hash=84394ce8f7f993daab1f3314acef8c22326feb18)
 rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 26, 2016, 04:27:54 PM
And this week I have booked myself into two different hotels  evil:

And my cleaners have texted to tell me that the suits I collected earlier both have the wrong trousers with them  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpreviewcf.turbosquid.com%2FPreview%2F2014%2F05%2F26__13_27_44%2FPicture%25203.png41703641-5069-464d-b313-2632b4939ea3Larger.jpg&hash=84394ce8f7f993daab1f3314acef8c22326feb18)
 rubschin:

happy001
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 26, 2016, 04:45:13 PM
 horn:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 27, 2016, 04:04:46 PM
More loonies today and I had lunch with a Paralympic gold medallist who was surrounded by swooning wimmin  ::)

Helped one of the good guys and got excellent revenge on a total clot before being accidentally stitched up with an old enemy by the bustily thrusting Leanne  noooo:

It's all go............. NickSick
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 29, 2016, 06:23:28 PM
Defeated 2 monkeys today and met another one who is a monkey dressed as a clown  evil:

Knackered and slightly poorly.  sad24:   May be getting my contract extended again  cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 29, 2016, 06:24:38 PM
Defeated 2 monkeys today and met another one who is a monkey dressed as a clown  evil:

Knackered and slightly poorly.  sad24:   May be getting my contract extended again  cloud9:

Lend us 50!  Thumbs:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on September 29, 2016, 08:07:35 PM
Walked through Reception earlier and saw two members of staff talkiing.

One of them pointed at me and said, "That's him!"

 scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on September 29, 2016, 08:24:23 PM
Walked through Reception earlier and saw two members of staff talkiing.

One of them pointed at me and said, "That's him!"

 scared2:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V7RMKq8RQj4 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V7RMKq8RQj4)

 eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 29, 2016, 09:07:02 PM
Defeated 2 monkeys today and met another one who is a monkey dressed as a clown  evil:

Knackered and slightly poorly.  sad24:   May be getting my contract extended again  cloud9:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mangauk.com%2Fgallery%2Falbums%2Falbum-18%2Flg%2Fmasaaki_sakai.jpg&hash=7ebd43689a27c7c97e13d6d6c360bc8a86a172f7)

 rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 30, 2016, 05:25:18 AM
Defeated 2 monkeys today and met another one who is a monkey dressed as a clown  evil:

Knackered and slightly poorly.  sad24:   May be getting my contract extended again  cloud9:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mangauk.com%2Fgallery%2Falbums%2Falbum-18%2Flg%2Fmasaaki_sakai.jpg&hash=7ebd43689a27c7c97e13d6d6c360bc8a86a172f7)

 rubschin:

(https://static.independent.co.uk/s3fs-public/thumbnails/image/2014/01/18/20/p28zulu1REX.jpg)

Surely?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on September 30, 2016, 06:47:10 AM
Defeated 2 monkeys today and met another one who is a monkey dressed as a clown  evil:

Knackered and slightly poorly.  sad24:   May be getting my contract extended again  cloud9:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mangauk.com%2Fgallery%2Falbums%2Falbum-18%2Flg%2Fmasaaki_sakai.jpg&hash=7ebd43689a27c7c97e13d6d6c360bc8a86a172f7)

 rubschin:

(https://static.independent.co.uk/s3fs-public/thumbnails/image/2014/01/18/20/p28zulu1REX.jpg)

Surely?

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 30, 2016, 10:08:33 AM
Defeated 2 monkeys today and met another one who is a monkey dressed as a clown  evil:

Knackered and slightly poorly.  sad24:   May be getting my contract extended again  cloud9:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mangauk.com%2Fgallery%2Falbums%2Falbum-18%2Flg%2Fmasaaki_sakai.jpg&hash=7ebd43689a27c7c97e13d6d6c360bc8a86a172f7)

 rubschin:

(https://static.independent.co.uk/s3fs-public/thumbnails/image/2014/01/18/20/p28zulu1REX.jpg)

Surely?

 lol: lol: lol:

More like

(https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/t/clowns-boxing-gloves-isolated-white-58660278.jpg)

as it sounds like Nick has found a kindred spirit...  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on October 01, 2016, 06:03:54 AM
Defeated 2 monkeys today and met another one who is a monkey dressed as a clown  evil:

Knackered and slightly poorly.  sad24:   May be getting my contract extended again  cloud9:

Is this a result of sleep deprivation ?  eeek:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on October 01, 2016, 01:20:07 PM
Defeated 2 monkeys today and met another one who is a monkey dressed as a clown  evil:

Knackered and slightly poorly.  sad24:   May be getting my contract extended again  cloud9:

Is this a result of sleep deprivation ?  eeek:

I read that as sheep deprivation.
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on October 01, 2016, 02:48:55 PM
Defeated 2 monkeys today and met another one who is a monkey dressed as a clown  evil:

Knackered and slightly poorly.  sad24:   May be getting my contract extended again  cloud9:

Is this a result of sleep deprivation ?  eeek:

I read that as sheep deprivation.

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi66.tinypic.com%2F20ubz93.gif&hash=fa21d61f9aa9d00222b6e98f778632394f849bcc)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 03, 2016, 04:30:27 PM
Another monkey obliterated eveilgrin:and a frightful problem with an awards ceremony  scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on October 03, 2016, 06:08:45 PM
Popcorn:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 03, 2016, 06:12:51 PM
 noooo: noooo: noooo: noooo: noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 04, 2016, 03:14:50 PM
So today some clown booked a theatre company to come in to do a performance to ALL new full time students. The subject matter turned out to be a quite a challenging (even harrowing) protrayal of child abuse and domestic violence  eeek:

The result was that a lot of students became quite hysterical and traumatised and squads of trained counsellors swung into action as the performance was abandoned. noooo: noooo: noooo:

Tomorrow I get to meet the (laydee) Sheriff of Shropshire (I have no clue why). WHat can possibly go wrong?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on October 04, 2016, 03:59:44 PM
So today some clown booked a theatre company to come in to do a performance to ALL new full time students. The subject matter turned out to be a quite a challenging (even harrowing) protrayal of child abuse and domestic violence  eeek:

The result was that a lot of students became quite hysterical and traumatised and squads of trained counsellors swung into action as the performance was abandoned. noooo: noooo: noooo:

Tomorrow I get to meet the (laydee) Sheriff of Shropshire (I have no clue why). WHat can possibly go wrong?

Don't forget to dress properly.

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fgaryosborn.moonfruit.com%2Fcommunities%2F2%2F004%2F005%2F471%2F112%2Fimages%2F4580424120_353x359.jpg&hash=7d9799c6fbdc03e1c5bde94858b5190ec1859548)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 04, 2016, 04:11:31 PM
Can I borrow yours?  angel1
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on October 04, 2016, 04:15:27 PM
Can I borrow yours?  angel1

 noooo:

It would clash with your hair.

(https://d.ibtimes.co.uk/en/full/1532424/northern-ireland-orange-order-march.jpg?w=400)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 04, 2016, 04:23:05 PM
 cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on October 04, 2016, 04:41:09 PM
So today some clown booked a theatre company to come in to do a performance to ALL new full time students. The subject matter turned out to be a quite a challenging (even harrowing) protrayal of child abuse and domestic violence  eeek:

The result was that a lot of students became quite hysterical and traumatised and squads of trained counsellors swung into action as the performance was abandoned. noooo: noooo: noooo:

Tomorrow I get to meet the (laydee) Sheriff of Shropshire (I have no clue why). WHat can possibly go wrong?

Surely whoever booked it knew what the content involved ??

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 04, 2016, 04:46:18 PM
 noooo: noooo: noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 04, 2016, 05:06:46 PM
Can I borrow yours?  angel1

 noooo:

It would clash with your hair.

(https://d.ibtimes.co.uk/en/full/1532424/northern-ireland-orange-order-march.jpg?w=400)

happy001
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 04, 2016, 05:08:46 PM
 evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 05, 2016, 05:03:25 PM
Oh boy!!

Last minute crisis means I have to work tomorrow. Both reg hotels are full and my team ( evil: ) assured me that this place was "nice".

This is my room  evil:


(https://s16.postimg.org/n6ufy8o29/20161005_172659.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/n6ufy8o29/)





(https://s16.postimg.org/4b12m7hbl/20161005_173405_Copy.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/4b12m7hbl/)

(https://s17.postimg.org/pkwjq5kez/20161005_172711.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/pkwjq5kez/)

(https://s9.postimg.org/szeqisr6j/20161005_172641.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/szeqisr6j/)

(https://s22.postimg.org/419hycxjh/20161005_172635.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/419hycxjh/)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on October 05, 2016, 05:25:25 PM
 noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 05, 2016, 05:26:07 PM
Oh boy!!

Last minute crisis means I have to work tomorrow. Both reg hotels are full and my team ( evil: ) assured me that this place was "nice".

This is my room  evil:


(https://s16.postimg.org/n6ufy8o29/20161005_172659.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/n6ufy8o29/)





(https://s16.postimg.org/4b12m7hbl/20161005_173405_Copy.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/4b12m7hbl/)

(https://s17.postimg.org/pkwjq5kez/20161005_172711.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/pkwjq5kez/)

(https://s9.postimg.org/szeqisr6j/20161005_172641.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/szeqisr6j/)

(https://s22.postimg.org/419hycxjh/20161005_172635.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/419hycxjh/)

Gayer:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 05, 2016, 05:30:51 PM
 cussing: cussing: cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 05, 2016, 06:18:25 PM
And the moral of the story is don't be daft enough to ask for hotel recommendations if you have narked off your team...  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 05, 2016, 06:24:33 PM
 evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 05, 2016, 06:40:12 PM
evil:

 point:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 05, 2016, 06:49:41 PM
 evil: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 05, 2016, 06:51:22 PM
You know considering your many. many years you'd think the younger generation wouldn't have to teach you all this stuff..  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on October 05, 2016, 07:42:03 PM
Proper Peter Stringfellow like pad ...how on earth did they think this was suitable ?  ;D
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 05, 2016, 10:30:06 PM
Proper Peter Stringfellow like pad ...how on earth did they think this was suitable ?  ;D

To be fair, he looks about the same age...  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Tipsy Gipsy on October 06, 2016, 04:57:19 AM
Are there any pictures of your closet?   rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 06, 2016, 05:29:32 AM
 cussing: cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on October 06, 2016, 05:51:07 AM
Are there any pictures of your closet?   rubschin:

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on October 06, 2016, 07:03:38 AM
Are there any pictures of your closet?   rubschin:

 lol: lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 06, 2016, 06:52:55 PM
 ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 11, 2016, 04:18:48 PM
Ironbridge and met that Maggie Philbin. SHe was wearing a tin foil suit and came in her own hovercraft with a robot butler  ::)

Now back at the White Elephant and working till whenever............May go OUT for dinner  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 11, 2016, 05:01:19 PM
An All Staff e mail floods in. "I have found a passport. Whose is it?"

I replied, "I guess the photo and the name might help."

 facepalm:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 11, 2016, 07:07:39 PM
An All Staff e mail floods in. "I have found a passport. Whose is it?"

I replied, "I guess the photo and the name might help."

 facepalm:

 noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on October 11, 2016, 11:43:18 PM
An All Staff e mail floods in. "I have found a passport. Whose is it?"

I replied, "I guess the photo and the name might help."

 facepalm:
  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on October 12, 2016, 08:50:11 AM
"I have found a passport. Who's is it?"
whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 12, 2016, 12:16:01 PM
"I have found a passport. Who's is it?"
whistle:

 lol: lol: lol:

I'm back...  surrender:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 12, 2016, 06:07:56 PM
 ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 13, 2016, 04:16:32 PM
One of my jobs has been to write the Prospectus. A draft was circulating and I was berated by a wumman
for starting sentences with the word "and". IT's WRONG!!!!

SHe e mailed me about it too  noooo:

So I sent her this  :thumbsup:

In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.
4 And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness.
5 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.
6 And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.
7 And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament: and it was so.
8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.
9 And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry land appear: and it was so.
10 And God called the dry land Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas: and God saw that it was good.
11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
12 And the earth brought forth grass, and herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed was in itself, after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.
14 And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years:
15 And let them be for lights in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth: and it was so.
16 And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: he made the stars also.
17 And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth,
18 And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness: and God saw that it was good.
19 And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.
20 And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl that may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven.
21 And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
22 And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth.
23 And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
24 And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so.
25 And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
26 And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.

She is a broken woman (I copied lots of other folks into my reply  :thumbsup:)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Uncle Mort on October 13, 2016, 05:08:30 PM
And what happened?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 13, 2016, 05:36:52 PM
And no reply  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 13, 2016, 05:50:12 PM
And the thread continues...  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 13, 2016, 06:09:29 PM
Not for long. Will soon post monkey and blindfold pics and then Madeira cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on October 13, 2016, 06:16:00 PM
One of my jobs has been to write the Prospectus. A draft was circulating and I was berated by a wumman
for starting sentences with the word "and". IT's WRONG!!!!

SHe e mailed me about it too  noooo:

So I sent her this  :thumbsup:

In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.
4 And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness.
5 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.
6 And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.
7 And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament: and it was so.
8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.
9 And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry land appear: and it was so.
10 And God called the dry land Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas: and God saw that it was good.
11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
12 And the earth brought forth grass, and herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed was in itself, after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.
14 And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years:
15 And let them be for lights in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth: and it was so.
16 And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: he made the stars also.
17 And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth,
18 And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness: and God saw that it was good.
19 And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.
20 And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl that may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven.
21 And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
22 And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth.
23 And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
24 And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so.
25 And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
26 And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.

She is a broken woman (I copied lots of other folks into my reply  :thumbsup:)
facepalm:  Nick's become a god botherer  noooo: and one with poor grammar too  noooo: noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 13, 2016, 10:03:46 PM
Not for long. Will soon post monkey and blindfold pics and then Madeira cloud9:

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Wjen I said I wanted this place to go out with a bang I didn't mean literally...  scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Tipsy Gipsy on October 14, 2016, 08:19:44 AM
Not for long. Will soon post monkey and blindfold pics and then Madeira cloud9:

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Wjen I said I wanted this place to go out with a bang I didn't mean literally...  scared2:


I looked at Medeira but didn't like the runway looked a bit too near the cliffs.   And then we landed in Carcassonne on Monday as if taking part in airshow, dropped down very fast, rose up, figure of 8 then landed, no brakes achieved the far end of the runway where he finally found the button to tip the wing slower uppers and the brakes... I think I am over it now.  shocked003
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 14, 2016, 08:21:55 AM
Not for long. Will soon post monkey and blindfold pics and then Madeira cloud9:

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Wjen I said I wanted this place to go out with a bang I didn't mean literally...  scared2:


I looked at Medeira but didn't like the runway looked a bit too near the cliffs.   And then we landed in Carcassonne on Monday as if taking part in airshow, dropped down very fast, rose up, figure of 8 then landed, no brakes achieved the far end of the runway where he finally found the button to tip the wing slower uppers and the brakes... I think I am over it now.  shocked003

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 18, 2016, 05:14:54 AM
Being taken out for lunch  cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Tipsy Gipsy on October 18, 2016, 08:20:19 AM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on October 18, 2016, 08:32:36 AM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)
lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on October 18, 2016, 08:44:35 AM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)
lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 18, 2016, 11:18:01 AM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)
lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:

 rubschin:

 eeek:

Who the hell gave BM pistols...  scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 18, 2016, 11:22:18 AM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)
lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:

 rubschin:

 eeek:

Who the hell gave BM pistols...  scared2:

 evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on October 18, 2016, 11:47:29 AM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)
lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:

 rubschin:

 eeek:

Who the hell gave BM pistols...  scared2:

 evil:

Thought it was our 'sleeping with the fishes?' ex poster Baldy
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 18, 2016, 11:55:25 AM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)
lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:

 rubschin:

 eeek:

Who the hell gave BM pistols...  scared2:

 evil:

Thought it was our 'sleeping with the fishes?' ex poster Baldy

Ah you missed that conversation back when Baldy first joined, BM was kind enough to model the back of his head for the avatart pic...  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 18, 2016, 12:10:07 PM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)
lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:

 rubschin:

 eeek:

Who the hell gave BM pistols...  scared2:

 evil:

Thought it was our 'sleeping with the fishes?' ex poster Baldy

Ah you missed that conversation back when Baldy first joined, BM was kind enough to model the back of his head for the avatart pic...  :thumbsup:

 evil:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 18, 2016, 12:14:34 PM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)
lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:

 rubschin:

 eeek:

Who the hell gave BM pistols...  scared2:

 evil:

Thought it was our 'sleeping with the fishes?' ex poster Baldy

Ah you missed that conversation back when Baldy first joined, BM was kind enough to model the back of his head for the avatart pic...  :thumbsup:

 evil:

What?  We all thought it was a nice gesture, especially as it wasn't taken from the front.  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 18, 2016, 12:21:43 PM

 scared2:
(https://s16.postimg.org/jlamrkftd/Hitman_PNG_Picture.png) (https://postimg.org/image/jlamrkftd/)
lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol: lol:

 rubschin:

 eeek:

Who the hell gave BM pistols...  scared2:

 evil:

Thought it was our 'sleeping with the fishes?' ex poster Baldy

Ah you missed that conversation back when Baldy first joined, BM was kind enough to model the back of his head for the avatart pic...  :thumbsup:

 evil:

What?  We all thought it was a nice gesture, especially as it wasn't taken from the front.  whistle:

 cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 18, 2016, 03:52:25 PM
 ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 19, 2016, 04:37:01 AM
My last day sad24:


Monkey: check
Blindfold: check
Baseball bat: check

What can possibly go wrong? rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 19, 2016, 06:46:20 AM
My last day sad24:


Monkey: check
Blindfold: check
Baseball bat: check

What can possibly go wrong? rubschin:

They don't write you a check...?
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Uncle Mort on October 19, 2016, 09:09:59 AM
My last day sad24:


Monkey: check
Blindfold: check
Baseball bat: check

What can possibly go wrong? rubschin:

Looks like you're planning a variation of 'Pin the Tail on the Donkey'
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 19, 2016, 12:27:53 PM
My last day sad24:


Monkey: check
Blindfold: check
Baseball bat: check


What can possibly go wrong? rubschin:

Given the combination of you, a blindfold and a baseball bat? The list is endless...  scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on October 19, 2016, 04:19:56 PM
My last day sad24:


Monkey: check
Blindfold: check
Baseball bat: check


What can possibly go wrong? rubschin:

Given the combination of you, a blindfold and a baseball bat? The list is endless...  scared2:

Sore nipples will be the least of his worries
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 19, 2016, 04:23:56 PM
My last day sad24:


Monkey: check
Blindfold: check
Baseball bat: check


What can possibly go wrong? rubschin:

Given the combination of you, a blindfold and a baseball bat? The list is endless...  scared2:

Sore nipples will be the least of his worries

 eeek:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 19, 2016, 06:09:57 PM
It was a triumph  cloud9: And I have lovely pressies. And now I am in Maida Vale cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on October 19, 2016, 06:14:47 PM
It was a triumph  cloud9: And I have lovely pressies. And now I am in Maida Vale cloud9:
:thumbsup:

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Pirate on October 19, 2016, 08:03:54 PM
It was a triumph  cloud9: And I have lovely pressies. And now I am in Maida Vale, handcuffed to a lamppost, drunk  and naked... cloud9:

 whistle:

Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 20, 2016, 11:13:23 AM
I now declare this thread closed.
(https://s17.postimg.org/uuay3fod7/DSC_0109.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/uuay3fod7/)

(https://s15.postimg.org/veckqfncn/DSC_0114.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/veckqfncn/)

(https://s18.postimg.org/n8e4j8wud/DSC_0116_Copy.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/n8e4j8wud/)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on October 20, 2016, 03:04:35 PM
"Bash my monkey girls...."  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on October 20, 2016, 04:12:46 PM
 ::)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on October 20, 2016, 06:02:44 PM
I now declare this thread closed.
(https://s17.postimg.org/uuay3fod7/DSC_0109.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/uuay3fod7/)

(https://s15.postimg.org/veckqfncn/DSC_0114.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/veckqfncn/)

(https://s18.postimg.org/n8e4j8wud/DSC_0116_Copy.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/n8e4j8wud/)

 :thumbsup:  you sure know how to make an exit Mr Nick
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on October 20, 2016, 09:29:16 PM
I now declare this thread closed.
(https://s17.postimg.org/uuay3fod7/DSC_0109.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/uuay3fod7/)

(https://s15.postimg.org/veckqfncn/DSC_0114.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/veckqfncn/)

(https://s18.postimg.org/n8e4j8wud/DSC_0116_Copy.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/n8e4j8wud/)

 :thumbsup:  you sure know how to make an exit Mr Nick

They thought he had already gone by that time.

The ginger anthropoid was an F.E.G.
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 21, 2016, 01:18:38 AM
Baseball bat: check

That's a rather...................English looking baseball bat Nick....  rubschin:

I now declare this thread closed.
(https://s17.postimg.org/uuay3fod7/DSC_0109.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/uuay3fod7/)

(https://s15.postimg.org/veckqfncn/DSC_0114.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/veckqfncn/)

(https://s18.postimg.org/n8e4j8wud/DSC_0116_Copy.jpg) (https://postimg.org/image/n8e4j8wud/)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on May 18, 2020, 08:07:57 AM
As they have now sacked three of my successors since I left, I am now negotiating to go back and sort out the latest mess  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on May 18, 2020, 08:12:49 AM
As they have now sacked three of my successors since I left, I am now negotiating to go back and sort out the latest mess  rubschin:
:thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Barman on May 18, 2020, 08:53:59 AM
As they have now sacked three of my successors since I left, I am now negotiating to go back and sort out the latest mess  rubschin:

Splendid!  happ096
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on May 18, 2020, 08:55:04 AM
Depends on there being a hotel to stay in  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on May 18, 2020, 10:24:07 AM
Depends on there being a hotel to stay in  rubschin:
Could always get a caravan, I'm sure you'll find one you can tow

(https://lightwater.files.wordpress.com/2014/07/4-close-up-of-a-mini-caravan.jpg?w=848)
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on May 18, 2020, 10:27:19 AM
That's TMR's
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Steve on May 18, 2020, 10:30:16 AM
Couldn't you just drive it each day?
 
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 18, 2020, 10:32:15 AM
Just a thought but given how things are at the moment try pushing your luck and see if you can work remotely.  rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Nick on May 18, 2020, 10:54:29 AM
Nah, I need to physically bang some heads together  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 18, 2020, 10:57:35 AM
Nah, I need to physically bang some heads together  eveilgrin:

Which is why working from home is a good thing, if you end up rocking up on their doorstep to bang heads together then you can charge extra for having to come down and sort out their monumental clusterfuck in person.  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The all new Nick's adventures in Telford thread
Post by: apc2010 on May 18, 2020, 11:20:03 AM
As they have now sacked three of my successors since I left, I am now negotiating to go back and sort out the latest mess  rubschin:

Ker ching......... Thumbs: