The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 08:55:11 AM

Title: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 08:55:11 AM
Post yer pissedooffednusswithallthisutterlyoverelyxcitedshite observations in 'ere. eveilgrin:  evil:

if I hear just ONE more 'kin 'seasonal song'  sick2: on the bastard radio, it'll be loudspeakering itself on another bastard planet. Angry9:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 09:14:40 AM
Suppiose I'm going to have to go out and get sneezed and coughed all over by the great overly excited pushing shoving greedy nasty unwashed tomorrow, and buy a few more bits of last minute and probably unappreciated 'traditional' tat and shite. Banghead
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 09:18:13 AM
Chicken for dinner I said 'cus I'm sick of paying obscene money for a poor bastard terkeee. eeek:

Over ruled 3/1...as usual. ::)

Cock off then and buy it yerself was my quick retort. :thumbsup:

Bought meself a 'The Asda' Smart Price chicky for one. cloud9:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 09:21:14 AM
Being imprisoned here in G Towers for a whole day, cus apparently.....it's traditional and the right thing to do to spend precious time with your family...alledgedly, so I've been TOLD. eeek:

How come I spend the other 364 days out of 365 generally on me own 'ere then ey? Shrugs:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 23, 2012, 09:23:23 AM
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F1.bp.blogspot.com%2F-tyC4PDRQ15g%2FTu_6r1sg6vI%2FAAAAAAAABmM%2FQ0f2S33VPgc%2Fs400%2Fbah%252Bhumbug%252521.jpg&hash=9a7b54961a64e5674a285aeda9236786)

 :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 09:25:31 AM
Wrapping tat and shite up in obscenly priced 'seasonal' wrapping paper. evil:

As John Bishop sez, geezers class wrapping prezzies as being wrapped up by moving them from one plassy bag to another. :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 09:27:18 AM
([url]https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F1.bp.blogspot.com%2F-tyC4PDRQ15g%2FTu_6r1sg6vI%2FAAAAAAAABmM%2FQ0f2S33VPgc%2Fs400%2Fbah%252Bhumbug%252521.jpg&hash=9a7b54961a64e5674a285aeda9236786[/url])

 :thumbsup:


You can sod off too, ho bloody bastard 'kin HO! evil:

Haven't you gorra mountain of turnips to be peeling or summat, or is that menial task passed down to the servants there at Darwin Castle? ::)
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 23, 2012, 09:33:13 AM
([url]https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F1.bp.blogspot.com%2F-tyC4PDRQ15g%2FTu_6r1sg6vI%2FAAAAAAAABmM%2FQ0f2S33VPgc%2Fs400%2Fbah%252Bhumbug%252521.jpg&hash=9a7b54961a64e5674a285aeda9236786[/url])

 :thumbsup:


You can sod off too, ho bloody bastard 'kin HO! evil:

Haven't you gorra mountain of turnips to be peeling or summat, or is that menial task passed down to the servants there at Darwin Castle? ::)


Never handle vegetables, look what happened to Mr Savile.  noooo:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 09:34:07 AM
Advent piggin' calenders. Shrugs:
WTF is THAT/THEY all about then ey? Banghead

Absolute load of bollox. Banghead
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Uncle Mort on December 23, 2012, 09:37:52 AM
This is a disappointment. From the title I thought you were planning on having a sex-change operation  eeek:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 23, 2012, 09:38:09 AM
Advent piggin' calenders. Shrugs:
WTF is THAT/THEY all about then ey? Banghead

Absolute load of bollox. Banghead

They are all Mayan and stop dead on 24th December.  scared2:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 23, 2012, 09:39:09 AM
This is a disappointment. From the title I thought you were planning on having a sex-change operation  eeek:

Or butter on the seasonal cake.  whistle:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 09:48:14 AM
This is a disappointment. From the title I thought you were planning on having a sex-change operation  eeek:

May as well have with the total lack of activity in the underpants dept this last few years. Banghead
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 09:51:52 AM
Well you's lot be all ho ho bloody jolly then if that's what floats yer boat. ::)

I'm going to be exceeeeeeeeedingly 'appy being the miserable owld bad tempered grumpy bastard that I am what makes me SSSSSSO joyous. cloud9:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 23, 2012, 09:56:36 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41bbtdqtRhs (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41bbtdqtRhs)
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Uncle Mort on December 23, 2012, 09:59:23 AM
This is a disappointment. From the title I thought you were planning on having a sex-change operation  eeek:


May as well have with the total lack of activity in the underpants dept this last few years. Banghead


(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffreesmileyface.net%2Fsmiley%2Fmusic%2Fviolin-011.gif&hash=80845453109c3c393fc1c4dc673da71b) (http://freesmileyface.net/free-music-smileys.html)
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on December 23, 2012, 12:10:17 PM
ASDA dropped off a 'home delivery' here last Friday.  I have only just got around to checking the substituted wine on their web site. The wine that they have substituted is nothing like the wine I ordered. evil:

I then phoned their customer care line and sat listening to offensive music and a tinny recorded message for 25 minutes. Angry9: Angry9:

I now have a 60 refund, 6 bottles of wine to do with as I will and the wind has been completely knocked out of my sails. Whoooosh lol: lol:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 02:10:27 PM
ASDA dropped off a 'home delivery' here last Friday.  I have only just got around to checking the substituted wine on their web site. The wine that they have substituted is nothing like the wine I ordered. evil:

I then phoned their customer care line and sat listening to offensive music and a tinny recorded message for 25 minutes. Angry9: Angry9:

I now have a 60 refund, 6 bottles of wine to do with as I will and the wind has been completely knocked out of my sails. Whoooosh lol: lol:

60 refund on a sodding bottle of wine?!! eeek: eeek: eeek:
You sure it'snot frankenstein and merr?

That's 'Nick obscene price territory' that!
?Sixty piggin' quid?I could nearly fill me tank up and enjoy a day out driving me favourite roads of N.wales for that!

Going for a lie down, and I've only just got up again too. noooo:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: apc2010 on December 23, 2012, 02:15:20 PM
ASDA dropped off a 'home delivery' here last Friday.  I have only just got around to checking the substituted wine on their web site. The wine that they have substituted is nothing like the wine I ordered. evil:

I then phoned their customer care line and sat listening to offensive music and a tinny recorded message for 25 minutes. Angry9: Angry9:

I now have a 60 refund, 6 bottles of wine to do with as I will and the wind has been completely knocked out of my sails. Whoooosh lol: lol:

60 refund on a sodding bottle of wine?!! eeek: eeek: eeek:
You sure it'snot frankenstein and merr?

That's 'Nick obscene price territory' that!
?Sixty piggin' quid?I could nearly fill me tank up and enjoy a day out driving me favourite roads of N.wales for that!

Going for a lie down, and I've only just got up again too. noooo:


Guess it was 6 bottles........... rubschin:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 02:23:16 PM
ASDA dropped off a 'home delivery' here last Friday.  I have only just got around to checking the substituted wine on their web site. The wine that they have substituted is nothing like the wine I ordered. evil:

I then phoned their customer care line and sat listening to offensive music and a tinny recorded message for 25 minutes. Angry9: Angry9:

I now have a 60 refund, 6 bottles of wine to do with as I will and the wind has been completely knocked out of my sails. Whoooosh lol: lol:

60 refund on a sodding bottle of wine?!! eeek: eeek: eeek:
You sure it'snot frankenstein and merr?

That's 'Nick obscene price territory' that!
?Sixty piggin' quid?I could nearly fill me tank up and enjoy a day out driving me favourite roads of N.wales for that!

Going for a lie down, and I've only just got up again too. noooo:


Guess it was 6 bottles........... rubschin:

Wha'ever.
Even a tenner a botttle is an eye bleeding price to pay....IMO. eeek:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: apc2010 on December 23, 2012, 02:25:30 PM
I like my local stuff .........5 litres for 6.50............. :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 02:35:16 PM
I like my local stuff .........5 litres for 6.50............. :thumbsup:

Good man.  :thumbsup:
That's GROWLER price territory, well it would be if actually could be bothered drinking alchohol anymore. ::)
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 23, 2012, 05:05:52 PM
 eastdrink048
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 05:50:25 PM
Potatoes. I ask you, exactly WTF is going on there then ey, what, exactly?

Is their another bastard potatoe famine on again, 'cus if there is, no twat told me about it. noooo:

The Asda....(NOT saving you money EVERY day at all  Angry9:)
Friday evening.
Not ONE solitary bastard spud on display or for sale! eeek:

WHY? eeek:  Shrugs:

Don't tell me that Mr and Mrs Greedy have bought the lot, just in case Brother in law bloater Bill and his equally binty bitch from Bournemouth MIGHT possibly drop by over this oh so piggin' happy and jolly festive holiday time? sick2:
Can the barage balloon features couple REALLY eat their combined weight in spuds, presumably washed down with a whole tanker load of milk dunked with enough loaves to feed the entire population of the southern hemisphere, EY...TELL ME! Angry9:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 05:55:07 PM
This is a disappointment. From the title I thought you were planning on having a sex-change operation  eeek:


May as well have with the total lack of activity in the underpants dept this last few years. Banghead


([url]https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffreesmileyface.net%2Fsmiley%2Fmusic%2Fviolin-011.gif&hash=80845453109c3c393fc1c4dc673da71b[/url]) ([url]http://freesmileyface.net/free-music-smileys.html[/url])


Correct, in fact i think I'll award and have a few to meself  like too...  Violins: Violins: Violins:...and again Violins:.........stud muffin. ::)
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 23, 2012, 05:56:22 PM
You seem vexed  happy100

At times like this I think of Miss D nekkid and covered in bubbles  angel1
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 05:58:32 PM
You seem vexed  happy100

At times like this I think of Miss D nekkid and covered in bubbles  angel1

That is inherently bad. noooo:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Uncle Mort on December 23, 2012, 06:04:06 PM
You seem vexed  happy100

At times like this I think of Miss D nekkid and covered in bubbles  angel1

That is inherently bad. noooo:

Slippery maybe but bad? ~ never.
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 06:07:12 PM
You seem vexed   happy100

At times like this I think of Miss D nekkid and covered in bubbles  angel1

10/bastard 10 for observation. :thumbsup:

I am.
I'm sick of all this totally ott pathetic fussing and flapping around with all these ho ho so so bastard jolly folk wanting to be your friend with best wishes all of a sudden.
Where've they been all piggin' year then ey, and why can't they be pleasant IF and when you see them then ey, TELL ME! cussing:

I'll 'kin tell you...cus they're generally PISSED and living in cloud cukoo land, thinking everything is all so happy and jolly all of a sudden, when in fact it's really not..
It's just another set of days leading up to a day of over extreme and disgusting over indulgence both edibly and financially, that will lead to may rows arguments and violence especially when the c/c bills come in, and all for what exactly?
A few seconds or even minutes if you're fotunate enough of short lived 'happiness and joy...apparently. ::)
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 23, 2012, 06:11:12 PM
 happy100
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 06:15:46 PM
I am NOT currently n the mood for patronising condescendingiasation......'if there is actually such a werd....right now, but thanks for the thought. Finger:
Please try later. evil:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 23, 2012, 06:25:31 PM
 sad32:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 23, 2012, 06:33:12 PM
sad32:

Oh go and bake some right handed mince pies or summat. ::)
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 23, 2012, 07:08:33 PM
 sad32: sad32: sad32: sad32: sad32: sad32:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Pirate on December 23, 2012, 07:19:41 PM
I am NOT currently n the mood for patronising condescendingiasation......'if there is actually such a werd....right now, but thanks for the thought. Finger:
Please try later. evil:


(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sherv.net%2Fcm%2Femoticons%2Fmooning%2Frude-santa-claus.gif&hash=509bae245c884364b8cc7c163b963182)
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 23, 2012, 07:26:23 PM
 Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Pirate on December 23, 2012, 07:39:22 PM
Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2: Spank2:

 scared:

happy002

Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: The Moan Ranger (Orderer of the Youngs) on December 23, 2012, 07:50:35 PM
So sad to see a regular of my real pub spending the next couple in clink.

http://www.accountancylive.com/croner/jsp/Editorial.do?channelId=-601054&contentId=2386119&Failed_Reason=Invalid+timestamp,+engine+has+been+restarted&Failed_Page=%2fjsp%2fEditorial.do&BV_UseBVCookie=No

My Lexus might be a lot older than his Beemer, but at least I paid for mine with my own money  point:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: GROWLER on December 24, 2012, 03:09:08 PM
I am NOT currently n the mood for patronising condescendingiasation......'if there is actually such a werd....right now, but thanks for the thought. Finger:
Please try later. evil:


([url]https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sherv.net%2Fcm%2Femoticons%2Fmooning%2Frude-santa-claus.gif&hash=509bae245c884364b8cc7c163b963182[/url])

I'd REALLY appreciate it if you didn't make any sort of reply to ANY of my posts please, as I REALLY cannot stand you...at all.
I will reciprocate accordingly of course.

Yours, a 'dickhead'...acccording to a grossly overweeight nasty bitch and equally and  thouroughly distasteful scuffer
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Pirate on December 24, 2012, 05:05:16 PM
I am NOT currently n the mood for patronising condescendingiasation......'if there is actually such a werd....right now, but thanks for the thought. Finger:
Please try later. evil:


([url]https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sherv.net%2Fcm%2Femoticons%2Fmooning%2Frude-santa-claus.gif&hash=509bae245c884364b8cc7c163b963182[/url])

I'd REALLY appreciate it if you didn't make any sort of reply to ANY of my posts please, as I REALLY cannot stand you...at all.
I will reciprocate accordingly of course.

Yours, a 'dickhead'...acccording to a grossly overweeight nasty bitch and equally and  thouroughly distasteful scuffer


 sad32:  sad32:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 19, 2017, 05:03:17 PM
Here we go again  noooo:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Barman on December 19, 2017, 05:11:58 PM
Poor Growler, can't be good for his ticker like...  noooo:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 19, 2017, 05:13:40 PM
I want it to be over  Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Barman on December 19, 2017, 05:19:06 PM
I want it to be over  Banghead Banghead

Life...?  eeek:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 19, 2017, 05:20:12 PM
I want it to be over  Banghead Banghead

Life...?  eeek:
noooo: His leg.
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 19, 2017, 05:21:03 PM
 cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Barman on December 19, 2017, 05:51:22 PM
I want it to be over  Banghead Banghead

Life...?  eeek:
noooo: His leg.

happy001
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 19, 2017, 05:56:40 PM
 sad32: sad32: sad32: sad32:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: apc2010 on December 19, 2017, 06:28:07 PM
I want it to be over  Banghead Banghead

Life...?  eeek:
noooo: His leg.

happy001

 drumroll:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 19, 2017, 06:30:38 PM
 Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: sad24:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: apc2010 on December 19, 2017, 06:46:03 PM
If I hadn't read the willycam thread ......I was expecting bad news for Nick .....from the thread title........ rubschin:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Barman on December 19, 2017, 07:01:15 PM
If I hadn't read the willycam thread ......I was expecting bad news for Nick .....from the thread title........ rubschin:

I'm always expecting bad news for Nick...  noooo:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 19, 2017, 07:08:23 PM
Why?
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Barman on December 19, 2017, 08:27:53 PM
Why?

happy001
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 19, 2017, 08:29:38 PM
 Shrugs:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on December 20, 2017, 07:31:27 AM
If I hadn't read the willycam thread ......I was expecting bad news for Nick .....from the thread title........ rubschin:

I'm always expecting bad news for Nick...  noooo:

For some reason the phrase "pot calling the kettle black" comes to mind....  rubschin:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Steve on December 20, 2017, 09:05:49 AM
The knob off crimbo thread

Such a way with words Growler had   lol:


Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Just One More on December 20, 2017, 05:27:04 PM
I want it to be over  Banghead Banghead

 :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Just One More on December 20, 2017, 05:28:49 PM
I want it to be over  Banghead Banghead

Life...?  eeek:
noooo: His leg.

happy001

happy001 happy001
Title: Re: The knob off crimbo thread
Post by: Nick on December 20, 2017, 05:37:53 PM
 cussing: cussing: cussing: