The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Nick on August 02, 2007, 01:29:34 PM

Title: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Nick on August 02, 2007, 01:29:34 PM
http://www.canada.com/nationalpost/news/story.html?id=7d95e996-4593-4188-ae60-75c0086aa776&k=12315 (http://www.canada.com/nationalpost/news/story.html?id=7d95e996-4593-4188-ae60-75c0086aa776&k=12315)

Just saw this in the paper!! eeek:
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Snoopy on August 02, 2007, 01:35:42 PM
http://www.canada.com/nationalpost/news/story.html?id=7d95e996-4593-4188-ae60-75c0086aa776&k=12315 (http://www.canada.com/nationalpost/news/story.html?id=7d95e996-4593-4188-ae60-75c0086aa776&k=12315)

Just saw this in the paper!! eeek:

Quote
An explosion in Toronto's stray cat population is the latest phenomenon being blamed on global warming, joining a growing list of evils that includes increases in hay fever and seal mating as well as decreases in the supply of maple syrup and Bulgarian prostitutes.

OK I'll buy the increase in stray cats, I'll accept that hay fever is on the increase, I'll take their word for it about seals screwing their brains out, I'll even believe that maple syrup supplies have decreased but WTF has global warming got to do with a decrease in the numbers of Bulgarian Prostitutes?
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Nick on August 02, 2007, 01:36:59 PM
Something to do with ski resorts and an absence of snow. Do try to keep up!
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Snoopy on August 02, 2007, 01:38:31 PM
Something to do with ski resorts and an absence of snow. Do try to keep up!

But that is not logical captain ~ animals wanna f*ck no matter what the weather ~ as the seals are proving.
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Nick on August 02, 2007, 01:39:29 PM
Have you actually read the story. Go on a ski trip. Too warm, no snow, feel a bit randy, engage service of a Bulagarian prostitute to fill the time. Perfectly logical!
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Misunderstood on August 02, 2007, 01:44:08 PM
ANIMALS wanna f*ck all the time???? 

I thought we were the species famous for that inclination.
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Nick on August 02, 2007, 01:45:24 PM
I saw some groundhogs at it the other day. Lot of grunting. Hard to explain to The Boy.
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Snoopy on August 02, 2007, 01:46:19 PM
Have you actually read the story. Go on a ski trip. Too warm, no snow, feel a bit randy, engage service of a Bulagarian prostitute to fill the time. Perfectly logical!

So why then the decrease in prostitute numbers? Are they melting or just worn out and going home?

I'll re-read the story. rubschin:
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Nick on August 02, 2007, 01:49:21 PM
It means the prostitutes are in the wrong places, a bit like the rain in WOrcester.

OK?

Anyway, here is a chance to post other bizarre (alleged) side effects of "global warming"
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Snoopy on August 02, 2007, 01:50:50 PM
Ah!
Quote
But not everyone's love life has been improved by climate change. Brothel owners in Bulgaria are now reportedly having trouble attracting workers. The owners claim the best prostitutes have moved to ski resorts, where they entertain tourists who cannot ski because of a lack of snow.
It took three read throughs to grasp that bit ~ now there was I thinking they were all over here claiming benefits ~ which is a far more likely explanation than Global Warming ~ which everyone is now agreed (except the Canadians apparently) has been replaced by Climate Change.
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Darwins Selection on August 02, 2007, 01:58:15 PM
a Bulagarian prostitute
I bet you couldn't even point out Bulagar on the map ::)
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Snoopy on August 02, 2007, 02:01:24 PM
a Bulagarian prostitute
I bet you couldn't even point out Bulagar on the map ::)

I assume you've drunk that half pint he stood you  whistle:
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Darwins Selection on August 02, 2007, 02:09:27 PM
a Bulagarian prostitute
I bet you couldn't even point out Bulagar on the map ::)
I assume you've drunk that half pint he stood you  whistle:
And Wenches perfume, and the whisky miniature someone left on the ledge in the gents. eastdrink048
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Uncle Mort on August 02, 2007, 02:18:40 PM
a Bulagarian prostitute
I bet you couldn't even point out Bulagar on the map ::)
I assume you've drunk that half pint he stood you  whistle:
And Wenches perfume, and the whisky miniaturesomeone left on the ledge in the gents. eastdrink048

 ;D ;D
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Pastis on August 02, 2007, 03:24:49 PM
Who would have thought it? (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml;jsessionid=5ZXEJKVJYF45RQFIQMGSFF4AVCBQWIV0?xml=/news/2007/08/02/nflood102.xml)

Quote
The early summer deluge may have proved a dampener for holidaymakers but the wet weather has guaranteed a bumper harvest of one of the world's culinary delights - truffles.

Mmmmm  ;)

Quote
Roger Jones, a chef, has already returned from a successful truffle hunt at a secret location close to his Michelin-starred restaurant, the Harrow at Little Bedwyn, near Hungerford, Berks. He found two kg (4.4lbs) of truffles in 20 minutes, with the help of his son Richard.

The 11-year-old is nicknamed Piglet because of his ability to feel around for the valuable ingredients with his feet. Mr Jones said: "There are enormous quantities out there at the moment if you know where to look. We barely had to move around to collect them and we could have found even more if we had tried harder.''

 eeek:
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Snoopy on August 02, 2007, 03:38:19 PM
Cue comments:
"It's an ill wind that does nobody any good"
"Every cloud has a silver lining"
OR
"Every silver lining has a f*cking black cloud round it" (That one's for Nick)

Over to the team .................
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Nick on August 02, 2007, 03:39:07 PM
I think you missed out the word "blows" somewhere in there. eeek:
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Darwins Selection on August 02, 2007, 03:42:37 PM
I think you missed out the word "blows" somewhere in there. eeek:
What, is your name Lewinski now?
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Snoopy on August 02, 2007, 03:44:59 PM
I think you missed out the word "blows" somewhere in there. eeek:

Wot? Where?
Depends I suppose on the version you grew up with.
It's an ill wind that does nobody any good or It's an ill wind that blows nobody any good.
On balance I prefer my Mother's version.
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 02, 2007, 05:34:08 PM
I saw some groundhogs at it the other day. Lot of grunting. Hard to explain to The Boy.

Just as long as you dont have to explain grunting teenagers to the boy later  point:
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Sour Puss on August 02, 2007, 05:53:41 PM

An explosion in Toronto's stray cat population is the latest phenomenon being blamed on global warming, joining a growing list of evils that includes increases in hay fever and seal mating as well as decreases in the supply of maple syrup and Bulgarian prostitutes.

What do Stray cats in Toronto have to to with photos of cats from Spain? "Stray cats are seen at an animal welfare centre in Algeciras, Spain". rubschin: If there are so many strays in Toronto why could they not take pictures of local kitties, why import them? Not good for the carbon footprint.  noooo:
Title: Re: Global Warming: Odd consequences
Post by: Misunderstood on August 03, 2007, 01:37:01 AM
Do you think it's possible that due to overcrowding, they decided to emigrate?

Everyone assumed that when the captain had said his ship runneth over, he was referring to rats.  confused: