The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Miss Demeanour on November 17, 2010, 09:01:11 AM
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Jeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzz ...how difficult can this be?
This has been delegated to members of the team this year. Normally we select a person from the names in the hat lucky draw and buy a Secret Santa pressy for about the value of £5 to be given out at the Christmas dinner.
This year they decided they wanted to do something different. We had voting options Banghead . Choices were between things like giving something recycled or homemade or something you got for free . Anyway it was decided we would go for a simple just buy a gift for a man or woman , no value limit and as you don't know who is going to pick it out then the risk of offending anybody is eliminated whistle:
However things have now got sooo frickin complicated with the organiser stating presents had to be wrapped in blue or pink , and people then saying they might pick the one that they have bought etc etc etc....
So this morning I have had to intervene and sent this to all ..
Without wishing to interfere in matters of national importance I aim to clarify the Secret Santa arrangements.
Its not that difficult - I guarantee!!!!!
Step 1 Wrap your wonderful , well thought out and very expensive present in whatever wrapping of your choice.
Step 2 Place a label or marking on the present that declares if it is for a male or a female. For the truly lazy a simple F or M should do . That is F & M !!!
Step 3 There will be 2 bags for the collection of Secret Santa presents ...place your present in the appropriate bag. For clarification ...man present in man bag / girly present in girly bag
Step 4 Walk away slowly ensuring no one can see what you dropped in bag and your risk of being sued in future will be reduced
Step 5 When choosing your present on the day , you can look in the bag and you should hopefully know what the present you bought looks like when YOU ( not your partner/ personal shopper or child) wrapped it up . Top Tip avoid selecting the present you bought ( unless you secretly wanted it !!! )
Step 6 Have a drink before opening it
Hope that sorts it all out now - any questions please find a Elf who may be able to assist because I have become The Grinch !!!
How much more confusion do you possibly think this could cause ??? Banghead
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Oh dear... noooo:
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Perhaps you could organise the pub secret santa? ;D
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We would obviously need guidance on the rules and regulations lol:
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We would obviously need guidance on the rules and regulations lol:
Off you go then... ;)
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I am not ~ repeat NOT ~ sitting on Nick's lap to get a present. evil:
He is a self confessed knob twiddler and producer of unwarranted quantities of "bubbles in the bath"!
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I think you lot might be even more difficult than my lot and that is saying something noooo:
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I think you lot might be even more difficult than my lot and that is saying something noooo:
evil:
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I think you lot might be even more difficult than my lot and that is saying something noooo:
Indeed it is Miss D but quite what we do not know. ;)
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Miss D's Virtual Secret Santa scheme......you all think of something you want to buy me and I accept these generous tokens of your affection without protesting too much whistle:
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I think you lot might be even more difficult than my lot and that is saying something noooo:
Just to cheer up Miss Grumpyboots.
A virtual pressy.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs4.postimage.org%2F22xky07ac%2FRoses.jpg&hash=95fe865c2b41691d81e1bf71c03bf3d010ee89d8) (http://postimage.org/image/22xky07ac/)
Clicky and it goes all big and sparkly.
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Miss D's Virtual Secret Santa scheme......you all think of something you want to buy me and I accept these generous tokens of your affection without protesting too much whistle:
rubschin:
And next year it will be my turn like? ;D
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Oooohhhhhh so it does cloud9:
Gorgeous ...you are my new bestest friend whistle:
( I will prolly have to pay copyright charges for that lol: )
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Reply to my original email from the eccentric one noooo: noooo: noooo:
Hi Miss D and all those approaching the Outer Limits,
Can I be confident that this procedure will be placed within the shared drive under our procedures and policies for all future reference and scrutiny ?
Moi facetious!
Facetious A word noted as having all vowels in order as abstemious.
Ciao ciao
Note to Peter I will get such grief !
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Too much time on his hands that one... far too much... noooo:
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Definitely. Sack him!
Anyway, Secret Santa, you may be surprised to hear I have always refused to join in at the office.
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I've never worked anywhere that did Secret Santa... not that they told me about anyway... rubschin:
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point:
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I've never worked anywhere that did Secret Santa... not that they told me about anyway... rubschin:
Me neither. sad32: I feel I have missed out on so much in life. noooo:
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I've never worked anywhere that did Secret Santa... not that they told me about anyway... rubschin:
Me neither. sad32: I feel I have missed out on so much in life. noooo:
We are above silly Santa games Miss C.... cloud9:
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You can all share in mine ..I have to buy for a bloke ...I just don't know what to get that will be suitably offensive happy001 happy001 happy001
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Mega strong deodorant?
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I've never worked anywhere that did Secret Santa... not that they told me about anyway... rubschin:
Me neither. sad32: I feel I have missed out on so much in life. noooo:
We are above silly Santa games Miss C.... cloud9:
Quite so BM. Miss D is being very kind and offering to share hers. I may have to fight you for the out of date box of Malteasers.
Miss D is a 'penis enlarger' suitably offensive?
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Socks again Miss C ;)
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Definitely. Sack him!
Anyway, Secret Santa, you may be surprised to hear I have always refused to join in at the office.
No surprise to me ~ I was the same
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.pictureshunt.com%2Fpics%2Ft%2Fthe_grinch-3008.gif&hash=822a415cf1acd856b62bfd6f3fd700b2cf301339)
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I've never worked anywhere that did Secret Santa... not that they told me about anyway... rubschin:
Me neither. sad32: I feel I have missed out on so much in life. noooo:
We are above silly Santa games Miss C.... cloud9:
Quite so BM. Miss D is being very kind and offering to share hers. I may have to fight you for the out of date box of Malteasers.
We'll share them... ;)
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I've never worked anywhere that did Secret Santa... not that they told me about anyway... rubschin:
Me neither. sad32: I feel I have missed out on so much in life. noooo:
We are above silly Santa games Miss C.... cloud9:
Quite so BM. Miss D is being very kind and offering to share hers. I may have to fight you for the out of date box of Malteasers.
We'll share them... ;)
Like the bottle of Ardbeg then ::)
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I've never worked anywhere that did Secret Santa... not that they told me about anyway... rubschin:
Me neither. sad32: I feel I have missed out on so much in life. noooo:
We are above silly Santa games Miss C.... cloud9:
Quite so BM. Miss D is being very kind and offering to share hers. I may have to fight you for the out of date box of Malteasers.
We'll share them... ;)
Like the bottle of Ardbeg then ::)
Ow! That stings! redface:
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I've never worked anywhere that did Secret Santa... not that they told me about anyway... rubschin:
Me neither. sad32: I feel I have missed out on so much in life. noooo:
We are above silly Santa games Miss C.... cloud9:
Quite so BM. Miss D is being very kind and offering to share hers. I may have to fight you for the out of date box of Malteasers.
We'll share them... ;)
Like the bottle of Ardbeg then ::)
Ow! That stings! redface:
You were supposed to drink it not put it on your shaving cuts. noooo: Sophisticated my arse. eveilgrin:
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I always liked the idea of being Secret Satan, wandering round prodding folk with my trident. whistle:
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A man needs a hobby.
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I've never taken part in a secret Santa, and never will, seems to be a "girl" thing. Mind you, I'm the one that never gives Christmas cards... every year I get plenty, every year I tell them don't bother, do the listen, do they bollocks. You can stick Christmas where the monkeys shove their nuts, I can't even be arsed to find a picture of a grumpy old sod cry:
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JOM is an grumpy bear today noooo:
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You can all share in mine ..I have to buy for a bloke ...I just don't know what to get that will be suitably offensive happy001 happy001 happy001
novelty 'viagra' tablets whistle:
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JOM is an grumpy bear today noooo:
Have they morphed into one. scared2:
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Jowler rubschin:
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Jowler rubschin:
That name has a certain ring to it, a certain gravitas if you will, or is that gravalax?
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They don't really exist of course...both are in BM's mind...(he has Dissociative Identity Disorder, don't you know) That is all...
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They don't really exist of course...both are in BM's mind...(he has Dissociative Identity Disorder, don't you know) That is all...
eeek:
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They don't really exist of course...both are in BM's mind...(he has Dissociative Identity Disorder, don't you know) That is all...
eeek:
Does this mean I am not really a Beagle? eeek:
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Jowler rubschin:
Grow-more, or should that be grew-some?
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JOM is an grumpy bear today noooo:
Any grumpiness was Christmas related, not JOM related, and it will get worse as Wenchy's countdown thingy goes down (For some reason I now have an image of Carol Vorderman ...)
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JOM is an grumpy bear today noooo:
Any grumpiness was Christmas related, not JOM related, and it will get worse as Wenchy's countdown thingy goes down (For some reason I now have an image of Carol Vorderman ...)
Ooohh.... Have you got pictures of her all over your basement wall like me... all covered with 'KILL' and 'DIE'? eveilgrin:
Ooops... I've said too much... redface: redface: redface:
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JOM is an grumpy bear today noooo:
Any grumpiness was Christmas related, not JOM related, and it will get worse as Wenchy's countdown thingy goes down (For some reason I now have an image of Carol Vorderman ...)
Ooohh.... Have you got pictures of her all over your basement wall like me... all covered with 'KILL' and 'DIE'? eveilgrin:
Ooops... I've said too much... redface: redface: redface:
eeek: Wenchy or the lovely Ms Vorderman?
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F4.bp.blogspot.com%2F_I8qnhs4cwUU%2FSWNhiz0jNxI%2FAAAAAAAAAZM%2F1RTJSF7BPZQ%2Fs400%2Fcarol_vorderman_19.jpg&hash=a02ddba3df1755947cb445b250fb2b9798130700)
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JOM is an grumpy bear today noooo:
Any grumpiness was Christmas related, not JOM related, and it will get worse as Wenchy's countdown thingy goes down (For some reason I now have an image of Carol Vorderman ...)
Ooohh.... Have you got pictures of her all over your basement wall like me... all covered with 'KILL' and 'DIE'? eveilgrin:
Ooops... I've said too much... redface: redface: redface:
eeek: Wenchy or the lovely Ms Vorderman?
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F4.bp.blogspot.com%2F_I8qnhs4cwUU%2FSWNhiz0jNxI%2FAAAAAAAAAZM%2F1RTJSF7BPZQ%2Fs400%2Fcarol_vorderman_19.jpg&hash=a02ddba3df1755947cb445b250fb2b9798130700)
I saw her in Waitrose in Maidenhead once... Vorderman that is, not Wenchy.... Crying her eyes out like... rubschin:
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Prolly crying 'cos she was in Maidenhead!
I'd have licked her tears redface:
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Had she taken too many from the top rubschin:
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Had she taken too many from the top rubschin:
Onions?