The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 04:24:19 PM

Title: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 04:24:19 PM
Miss D's official Anti Valentine's day thread

I don't want to see any more stuffed , paper or chocolate hearts in every shop window  censored:

Some silly bint was  wailing into her phone this morning about how she wasn't going to have one this year  ( a Valentine that is ) and how her friends kept asking her knowing this was the case, they were just trying to rub it in etc etc etc. Path of the course for a teen you may think . She must have been thirty odd if she was a day  eeek:

Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 03, 2010, 04:27:53 PM
Killjoy.


Just think how many John Terry will get!
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 04:28:08 PM
Valentine...?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 04:29:32 PM
A few days after LL's birthday BM - you know February the month of the double whammy for you .

I do hope you're prepared  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 04:30:23 PM
Killjoy.


Just think how many John Terry will get!

 lol:

I certainly wouldn't eat any chocolates he got sent  scared2:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 04:30:36 PM
A few days after LL's birthday BM - you know February the month of the double whammy for you .

I do hope you're prepared  whistle:

Wedding anniversary too... easy to remember like... no reason to forget...  redface:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Uncle Mort on February 03, 2010, 04:31:45 PM
There's been a little Valentines display in our village shop for a week or so already.

 cussing:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 04:32:37 PM
I went to the pet shop today - even they had a mahoosive display of cards and cuddly shite...  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 04:32:58 PM
A few days after LL's birthday BM - you know February the month of the double whammy for you .

I do hope you're prepared  whistle:

Wedding anniversary too... easy to remember like... no reason to forget...  redface:

The Holy Trinity then ...best dust the wallet off  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 04:34:22 PM
A few days after LL's birthday BM - you know February the month of the double whammy for you .

I do hope you're prepared  whistle:

Wedding anniversary too... easy to remember like... no reason to forget...  redface:

The Holy Trinity then ...best dust the wallet off  whistle:

Loadsa time yet...
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 03, 2010, 04:39:45 PM
You wanna see the Valentine tat in Poundland.

Give that to somebody, and a slap will be the least you can expect.
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 04:41:09 PM
You wanna see the Valentine tat in Poundland.

Give that to somebody, and a slap will be the least you can expect.

Poundland...?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 04:46:45 PM
I once made the mistake of posting a Valentine's card to an ex . He had returned from abroad and was staying at his parents

I forgot he had the same initial as his dad  redface:

His dad opened it  ( thinking it was from his wife ) and it said on the front something along the lines of  "On this special day I have 3 little words to tell you "

Then you opened it up and inside was very rude  redface: redface: redface:

It was most definitely not from his wife
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 04:56:29 PM
I once made the mistake of posting a Valentine's card to an ex . He had returned from abroad and was staying at his parents

I forgot he had the same initial as his dad  redface:

His dad opened it  ( thinking it was from his wife ) and it said on the front something along the lines of  "On this special day I have 3 little words to tell you "

Then you opened it up and inside was very rude  redface: redface: redface:

It was most definitely not from his wife

You sent the card to your ex...?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 03, 2010, 04:56:35 PM
Many moons ago, I was sent one and the ex went ballistic.

Never did find out who sent it, but think it may have been one of her sisters..
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 04:57:28 PM

You sent the card to your ex...?  rubschin:

No, he wasn't an ex at the time you muppet  doh:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 03, 2010, 04:59:08 PM

You sent the card to your ex...?  rubschin:

No, he wasn't an ex at the time you muppet  doh:

just straight afterwards then?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 05:00:51 PM

You sent the card to your ex...?  rubschin:

No, he wasn't an ex at the time you muppet  doh:

But, but, but you said-  evil:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 05:02:51 PM
I know that's what I said but that's not necessarily what I meant now is it  lol:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 03, 2010, 05:03:54 PM
Say what you mean, dear.
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 05:04:09 PM

You sent the card to your ex...?  rubschin:

No, he wasn't an ex at the time you muppet  doh:

just straight afterwards then?

Yeah - no sense of humour some people  lol:

But no ...that wasn't the nail in the coffin
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 05:05:49 PM
I know that's what I said but that's not necessarily what I meant now is it  lol:

**cough**

I once made the mistake of posting a Valentine's card to an ex . He had returned from abroad and was staying at his parents

 whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 05:06:38 PM
Well he is an ex ......he is definitely not one of the current ones  Shrugs:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 03, 2010, 05:07:27 PM
Well he is an ex ......he is definitely not one of the current ones  Shrugs:

She has a hareem!  eeek:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Darwins Selection on February 03, 2010, 05:17:56 PM
Well he is an ex ......he is definitely not one of the current ones  Shrugs:

She has a hareem!  eeek:

What is the collective noun for Gigolos?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 05:19:05 PM
 rubschin:

Knackered

 lol:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 07:26:00 PM
OMG ...I have just had another form of heart attack  eeek:

There was an absolute Adonis at the gym  cloud9: cloud9: cloud9:

Not overly puffed up

Not spending all his time looking in the mirror

Just pure, gorgeousness

Beautiful scenery sometimes makes the world a much better place  whistle:

Hubba Hubba   eyes: eyes: eyes:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 08:03:40 PM
OMG ...I have just had another form of heart attack  eeek:

There was an absolute Adonis at the gym  cloud9: cloud9: cloud9:

Not overly puffed up

Not spending all his time looking in the mirror

Just pure, gorgeousness

Beautiful scenery sometimes makes the world a much better place  whistle:

Hubba Hubba   eyes: eyes: eyes:

Gay...  ::)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 08:06:31 PM
Prolly  Shrugs:

I was only looking  ....subtley ..out of the corner of my eye like  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 03, 2010, 08:07:05 PM
Prolly  Shrugs:

I was only looking  ....subtley ..out of the corner of my eye like  whistle:

What, like this >>>>  Drool: Drool: Drool:

 ::)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 03, 2010, 08:12:35 PM
I'll take my camera phone in there next time  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: GROWLER on February 03, 2010, 09:25:56 PM
I went to the pet shop today - even they had a mahoosive display of cards and cuddly shite...  noooo:

Could you p'raps buy one for me  and send it me rat like? whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Pastis on February 04, 2010, 12:16:15 AM
I'll take my camera phone in there next time  whistle:

Tsk!   ;)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 04, 2010, 12:41:28 PM
I was in the gym this morning. Don't think anyone took my picture though.  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 04, 2010, 12:43:04 PM
You never know. There might have been a pervert in there  happy088
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 04, 2010, 12:46:44 PM
I though I was alone!
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 04, 2010, 12:48:13 PM
You are never alone with a pervert  ;D razz:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 04, 2010, 12:49:57 PM
Anyways, we can all afford to buy something for Miss D. I'm sure she will be suitably impressed and grateful.

http://www.poundland.co.uk/top-tips/valentines-day/
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 04, 2010, 12:50:58 PM
 scared2:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 04, 2010, 12:52:52 PM
I was in the gym this morning. Don't think anyone took my picture though.  noooo:

I have camera and am prepared to travel  ;)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 04, 2010, 01:14:45 PM
Anyways, we can all afford to buy something for Miss D. I'm sure she will be suitably impressed and grateful.

http://www.poundland.co.uk/top-tips/valentines-day/


Ooohh you are too kind - but really I am not worth it  lol:

Save your pennies .......what with the price of Youngs increasing daily you may need them  whistle:

Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Darwins Selection on February 04, 2010, 02:10:27 PM
Perfect (http://www.poundland.co.uk/product-range/a-z/bull-posing-pouch/)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 04, 2010, 02:21:03 PM
Perfect (http://www.poundland.co.uk/product-range/a-z/bull-posing-pouch/)

Bah!

They don't do XL....  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 04, 2010, 03:59:41 PM
Perfect (http://www.poundland.co.uk/product-range/a-z/bull-posing-pouch/)

Bah!

They don't do XL....  whistle:

So that's a 40 inch waist then?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 05, 2010, 11:33:55 AM
We have just received some corporate message about using The V Day and showing you have heart by donating to the Haiti Appeal  Banghead Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 05, 2010, 11:34:54 AM
Do the Haitians need foil wrapped chocolate hearts and suchlike?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 05, 2010, 11:38:13 AM
So on the basis that I wasn't going to spend a penny on that stuff they will not be getting much out of me  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 05, 2010, 04:12:11 PM
So on the basis that I wasn't going to spend a penny on that stuff they will not be getting much out of me  whistle:

They'll be getting feck all from me... no offence...  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 05, 2010, 04:14:57 PM
You could send a card

http://s5.tinypic.com/2s7b2n6.jpg (http://s5.tinypic.com/2s7b2n6.jpg)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Pastis on February 06, 2010, 06:57:03 PM
I shall be sending this card

http://www.telescience.asia/newsroom/ecards/2010cny/cny_2010.html    razz:

(featuring one of my chum's tiger illustrations  cloud9:)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Snoopy on February 07, 2010, 01:29:37 PM
 eeek: That should carry an epilepsy warning.
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 09, 2010, 09:24:51 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdlDb74TwMo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdlDb74TwMo)
 razz:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 09, 2010, 09:37:16 AM
Yuk  sick2:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 10, 2010, 12:26:55 PM
I have flicked on the TV whilst getting some lunch ready...

Is there no feckin channel that isn't droning on about heart shaped ravioli, champagne , chocolates, most romantic moment etc etc etc  Banghead Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 10, 2010, 12:31:54 PM
I've been down to the post office this morning... had to warn Andreas to expect a mahoosive delivery of cards for me in the next few days....  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 10, 2010, 12:34:31 PM
Return to sender ones  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 10, 2010, 12:37:35 PM
Return to sender ones  whistle:
lol: lol: lol:








 cussing:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 10, 2010, 12:38:36 PM
 drumroll:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Snoopy on February 10, 2010, 12:46:24 PM
I have flicked on the TV whilst getting some lunch ready...

Is there no feckin channel that isn't droning on about heart shaped ravioli, champagne , chocolates, most romantic moment etc etc etc  Banghead Banghead Banghead

The boys are watching CBBC ~ no hearts, flowers, ravioli, champagne or anything ..... just wall to wall children's drivel.
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 10, 2010, 01:20:11 PM
I just got sent this  lol:


http://www.pumahardchorus.com/?quid=61193823324S1118536T&gkid=84--CHZN_Uneqpubehf--CHZN_Uneqpubehf--789b619b598 (http://www.pumahardchorus.com/?quid=61193823324S1118536T&gkid=84--CHZN_Uneqpubehf--CHZN_Uneqpubehf--789b619b598)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 11, 2010, 01:33:41 PM
The deliveries at work have begun  noooo:

Some poor bloke squashed in the lift with 2 hoooge bouquets and a red heart helium balloon  Banghead Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 11, 2010, 01:37:22 PM
I imagine your "personal trainer" is out shopping as we speak  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Pastis on February 11, 2010, 01:37:48 PM
And by Sunday    whistle:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs1.postimage.org%2FlH9qi.jpg&hash=f3e20571f3975c3c51376346cc37132aae4bd4e4) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=gxlH9qi)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 11, 2010, 01:38:20 PM
I imagine your "personal trainer" is out shopping as we speak  whistle:

I don't think so somehow  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 11, 2010, 01:38:56 PM
And by Sunday    whistle:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs1.postimage.org%2FlH9qi.jpg&hash=f3e20571f3975c3c51376346cc37132aae4bd4e4) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=gxlH9qi)


Some viagra will soon sort those out
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Pastis on February 11, 2010, 05:42:39 PM
I've been sent a card and two emails so far   ;D

This year's lunar cycle makes it somewhat confusing coz they're all to do with this chap  whistle:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs2.postimage.org%2Fo9tj9.jpg&hash=ab45661cfc1af287313c825ae3d8134347c43ef5) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=Tso9tj9)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 11, 2010, 07:03:53 PM
No cards or e-mails... yet....  sad24:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 11, 2010, 07:14:05 PM
I have received a lovely personalised card  eeek:

 rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 11, 2010, 07:14:50 PM
I have received a lovely personalised card  eeek:

 rubschin:

You haven't opened it before the big day have you...?  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Pastis on February 11, 2010, 07:15:17 PM
No cards or e-mails... yet....  sad24:

Kung Hei Fat Choy!
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 11, 2010, 07:16:42 PM
I have received a lovely personalised card  eeek:

 rubschin:

You haven't opened it before the big day have you...?  noooo:

I didn't know what it was ...it was in an official looking large envelope  redface:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 11, 2010, 07:17:54 PM
I have received a lovely personalised card  eeek:

 rubschin:
point: point: point: point: point: point: point: point: point: point: point:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 11, 2010, 07:18:38 PM
Who the feck sent it ....drives me mad this stuff  evil: evil: evil:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 11, 2010, 07:20:12 PM
Have you tried it for fingerprints or DNA?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 11, 2010, 07:20:52 PM
I have received a lovely personalised card  eeek:

 rubschin:

You haven't opened it before the big day have you...?  noooo:

I didn't know what it was ...it was in an official looking large envelope  redface:

Didn't it have S.W.A.L.K. on the back or 'Do not open before February 14th?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 11, 2010, 07:21:47 PM
Is it postmarked NORWICH (snigger)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 11, 2010, 07:22:46 PM
Is it postmarked NORWICH (snigger)

 Shrugs:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 11, 2010, 07:24:00 PM
We have done this before. Where is the AFFS when you need him?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 11, 2010, 07:24:28 PM
Normal postage paid ...postmark indistinguishable . No other clues


I shall send it to CSI London they will solve the puzzle in about 20 years  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 11, 2010, 07:24:48 PM
We have done this before. Where is the AFFS when you need him?

I dunno... what does it mean...?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 11, 2010, 07:25:48 PM
Normal postage paid ...postmark indistinguishable . No other clues


I shall send it to CSI London they will solve the puzzle in about 20 years  noooo:

 rubschin:

What was the message then...? did it mention biceps and lats and stuff... or a leaky Metro...?  Shrugs:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 11, 2010, 07:27:48 PM
Nope none of that ....

It is an A4 sized card with my name printed in the middle of one stick of rock and another stick of rock with the I heart you in it
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 11, 2010, 07:28:37 PM
Nope none of that ....

It is an A4 sized card with my name printed in the middle of one stick of rock and another stick of rock with the I heart you in it

Rock Hard Rod!  eeek:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 11, 2010, 07:30:57 PM
My thoughts exactly.  eeek:

Any batteries in there too?  eeek:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 11, 2010, 07:32:35 PM
A4 indicates a big spender too....  happy088
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 11, 2010, 07:33:06 PM
No nothing  in it

The Brat is disgusted by it  lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 11, 2010, 07:34:17 PM
Only cos she has none apart from spotty smelly 14 year olds  point:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 11, 2010, 07:36:22 PM
No nothing  in it

The Brat is disgusted by it  lol: lol: lol:

 happy001
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Darwins Selection on February 11, 2010, 09:37:53 PM
Is it postmarked NORWICH (snigger)

 Shrugs:
Nick Observes RailWays In Cake Hallucinations
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Pirate on February 11, 2010, 09:47:56 PM
 ::)

Nickers Off Ready When I Come Home
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Darwins Selection on February 11, 2010, 09:51:35 PM
::)

Nickers Off Ready When I Come Home

Really?

Who would have thought that?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Pirate on February 11, 2010, 09:52:49 PM
Not BM happy001
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 12, 2010, 06:35:30 AM
I am pure of mind...  angel1
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 12, 2010, 07:17:31 AM
Or absent of one  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 12, 2010, 07:19:51 AM
 evil:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 12, 2010, 09:14:49 AM
A primary school in Weston-super-Mare has been criticised for banning Valentine cards to save pupils the "emotional trauma" of being rejected.

One pupil's mother said: "I think it's outrageous. They're just children. Why spoil their fun?"

The woman, whose son attends the school, said: "It's comical really. I couldn't believe it when I saw the newsletter.
 
"My son is six and he's had a little girlfriend since nursery. They say they're going to get married, but we don't read anything into it."

Mr Turner said in the newsletter that children get upset when they are "dumped" which interrupts their learning.

He said children should wait until they are mature enough emotionally and socially to understand the commitment in having a boyfriend or girlfriend.




 noooo: noooo: noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 12, 2010, 12:04:11 PM
A primary school in Weston-super-Mare has been criticised for banning Valentine cards to save pupils the "emotional trauma" of being rejected.

One pupil's mother said: "I think it's outrageous. They're just children. Why spoil their fun?"

The woman, whose son attends the school, said: "It's comical really. I couldn't believe it when I saw the newsletter.
 
"My son is six and he's had a little girlfriend since nursery. They say they're going to get married, but we don't read anything into it."

Mr Turner said in the newsletter that children get upset when they are "dumped" which interrupts their learning.

He said children should wait until they are mature enough emotionally and socially to understand the commitment in having a boyfriend or girlfriend.




 noooo: noooo: noooo:


perhaps you should send that card back like...?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 12, 2010, 12:07:12 PM
What, all the way to Cyprus?  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 12, 2010, 12:09:57 PM
 lol:

Not sent from abroad though - very British postmark  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 12, 2010, 04:00:58 PM
 ??


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUIgA4Cmu5A&feature=youtube_gdata
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 12, 2010, 07:08:22 PM
 lol: lol: lol:

Most excellent
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 14, 2010, 07:54:45 AM
Nuffink... not one card...  sad24:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 08:06:24 AM
I am sure LL got lots  cloud9:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 08:15:01 AM
The day is still young BM - LL might be planning a lovely surprise for you  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 08:17:06 AM
A new collar and lead?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 14, 2010, 08:25:33 AM
The day is still young BM - LL might be planning a lovely surprise for you  whistle:

 noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 08:40:59 AM
Patience dear man  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 08:41:29 AM
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Faka.zero.jibjab.com%2Fassets%2Fproduction%2F05%2F99%2F80%2F82%2F458mp9.png&hash=9b09764a348d23fdf076efe55aaea11da0d2a472)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 08:43:16 AM
 eeek:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 08:48:28 AM
One for Growler   lol:


(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffeministing.com%2FimageStorage%2Frevmeup.jpg&hash=4a3b797926726b72c34a5ffbf34e0c517c7ca277)


Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 08:50:16 AM
You can't see the car properly  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 08:51:03 AM
For DS  lol:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ironicsans.com%2Fimages%2Fvalentine-darwin.gif&hash=8328ef9973179a4b84c7d10a91c058bce1042711)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 08:52:42 AM
For BM   lol:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ft2.gstatic.com%2Fimages%3Fq%3Dtbn%3AV2TyKDBnmBkMMM%3Ahttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.moonbattery.com%2Fal_gore_valentine.jpg&hash=2c9f3b0359fa01d144f92855ca3fec2f06cc4edd)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 08:55:22 AM
For JOM and Pirate

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi180.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fx191%2FWonerWoman%2Fhappy-valentines-day-sexy-1.jpg&hash=378ac218cd3b30485a3fb5908bfc8e48e7773a7e)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 08:59:17 AM
For Grumpmeister

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.geeknews.net%2Fimages%2F2008%2F02%2F6-my-sweet-valentine.jpg&hash=b81b173cbc892afc600e3af5fbcd8e469d83370e)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 09:02:50 AM
Will this never end?  surrender:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 09:05:18 AM
Nope

For Pastis  lol:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F2.bp.blogspot.com%2F_cGvvG-yUAB4%2FSZTXE3DgL-I%2FAAAAAAAAAYc%2FR7iemjqVWJw%2Fs400%2Ffree-vintage-valentine-card-popcorn-and-red-heart.jpg&hash=c87e6aec4362c638b512b66d8d193fb5f8f82a09)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 14, 2010, 09:05:42 AM
For BM   lol:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ft2.gstatic.com%2Fimages%3Fq%3Dtbn%3AV2TyKDBnmBkMMM%3Ahttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.moonbattery.com%2Fal_gore_valentine.jpg&hash=2c9f3b0359fa01d144f92855ca3fec2f06cc4edd)

 evil:

I want one with a bird on it like!  cussing:

No, not the bloody feathered variety either...  ::)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 09:06:26 AM
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs1.hubimg.com%2Fu%2F2399072_f248.jpg&hash=b8d919c5266f74aa16b4d9a3101cd49ab2c525f5)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 14, 2010, 09:07:11 AM
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs1.hubimg.com%2Fu%2F2399072_f248.jpg&hash=b8d919c5266f74aa16b4d9a3101cd49ab2c525f5)

Who is that one for...?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 09:13:21 AM
For Nick  lol:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmitchieville.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2009%2F02%2Fvalentine-card7.jpg&hash=8e368dd86096b4606dea08aa4cfdf96451bf5f9c)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 09:14:56 AM
For Uncle M

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.doobybrain.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2008%2F02%2Ffloating-in-space-valentine.jpg&hash=bc1d9992a1b016fb2489a24fc819f52c1c0f20fa)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 14, 2010, 09:15:39 AM
You're a bit of a floozy aren't you...?  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 09:16:28 AM
I spect her front door will be jammed when she gets home  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 09:17:05 AM
For TMR and Tel

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bento.com%2Fpix%2Fbrews%2Fbrews66d.jpg&hash=3e914ae869a105dbb46eb3f7d9202bcf05c39dc4)

Why bother ruining the picture with anything else  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 09:21:27 AM
For TG and Mrs TG

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fneatorama.cachefly.net%2Fimages%2F2008-02%2Fwii-belong-together-valentine.jpg&hash=5834ecbcb253e0a61cba4b673afd694782eb3e07)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Tipsy Gipsy on February 14, 2010, 09:32:32 AM
My postbox is empty too.  sad32:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 09:33:07 AM
For BM   lol:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ft2.gstatic.com%2Fimages%3Fq%3Dtbn%3AV2TyKDBnmBkMMM%3Ahttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.moonbattery.com%2Fal_gore_valentine.jpg&hash=2c9f3b0359fa01d144f92855ca3fec2f06cc4edd)

 evil:

I want one with a bird on it like!  cussing:

No, not the bloody feathered variety either...  ::)

Some people are so bloody ungrateful  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Pirate on February 14, 2010, 09:51:33 AM
To Miss D

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi48.tinypic.com%2F28u6via.jpg&hash=8343dd390534feb29ac828bcd201032f716fa08b)

Guess who

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsmileys%2Fsmiley-love071.gif&hash=720d4563e6ebe9086e798b73fa43603e65a9c592) (http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: The Moan Ranger on February 14, 2010, 09:54:15 AM
For TMR and Tel

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bento.com%2Fpix%2Fbrews%2Fbrews66d.jpg&hash=3e914ae869a105dbb46eb3f7d9202bcf05c39dc4)

Why bother ruining the picture with anything else  whistle:

Young's Oatmeal Stout  Drool: Drool: Drool:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 10:10:56 AM

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs4.postimage.org%2FVTnbr.jpg&hash=37d2f2ae236e7160d70110bd2c9f2800630b5227) (http://www.postimage.org/)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 14, 2010, 10:28:29 AM

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs4.postimage.org%2FVTnbr.jpg&hash=37d2f2ae236e7160d70110bd2c9f2800630b5227) (http://www.postimage.org/)


And...?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 10:30:33 AM
It's a gentleman's patent silver plated Valentine's ball scratcher  ::)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Just One More on February 14, 2010, 11:03:17 AM
Do they come in larger sizes?  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 11:06:42 AM
Buy a pitchfork  ::)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 14, 2010, 11:15:07 AM
It's a gentleman's patent silver plated Valentine's ball scratcher  ::)

Is that what Katie send you...?  lol:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 11:16:58 AM
Now you are talking like a foreigner  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 14, 2010, 11:35:14 AM
Now you are talking like a foreigner  noooo:

Catching it is....  scared2:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 14, 2010, 12:07:46 PM
One for uncle

http://blogs.zooniverse.org/galaxyzoo/2010/02/14/happyvalentinesday/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+GalaxyZooBlog+(Galaxy+Zoo+Blog)&utm_content=Google+UK (http://blogs.zooniverse.org/galaxyzoo/2010/02/14/happyvalentinesday/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+GalaxyZooBlog+(Galaxy+Zoo+Blog)&utm_content=Google+UK)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Snoopy on February 14, 2010, 12:18:12 PM
Wake me when it's over.

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.mac.com%2Fjohnhood%2FPictures%2FBlogger%2FSnoopyInHeart.jpg&hash=ba286fdade422cc98304193a8745eef82e24c4f0)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 14, 2010, 12:18:28 PM
For TMR and Tel

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bento.com%2Fpix%2Fbrews%2Fbrews66d.jpg&hash=3e914ae869a105dbb46eb3f7d9202bcf05c39dc4)

Why bother ruining the picture with anything else  whistle:

So thoughtful
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 14, 2010, 07:12:51 PM
Is that not what you wanted then ? scared2:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 15, 2010, 08:43:14 AM
Is that not what you wanted then ? scared2:

Bottled/tinned beer gives me hiccups, and I can hiccup for a very long time!
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 15, 2010, 08:44:41 AM
Can we close this thread then, I got precisely zero... as usual...  evil:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 15, 2010, 08:50:25 AM
I found a bunch of flowers on my doorstep.  rubschin:

Maybe someone's cat died there or summat?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 15, 2010, 08:53:41 AM
 eyes: eyes: eyes:

Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 15, 2010, 08:55:34 AM
eyes: eyes: eyes:



You put the flowers there?  eeek:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 15, 2010, 08:58:23 AM
Yes ...I just went to Somerset so I could have an alibi  whistle:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: GROWLER on February 15, 2010, 09:16:43 AM
Can we close this thread then, I got precisely zero... as usual...  evil:

Don't fret oh Bar Man. I've only ever recieved a poxy valentine once in me entire life, and I still to this day suspect that it was from me mum when I was 11.  ::)

It's a load of old bollox anyway, problee invented by the Yanks. Shite normally is.

Any'ow, if you fancy someone, just come out and tell them straight like, no messin about with stupid cards and daft messages of sloppy crap. noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Darwins Selection on February 15, 2010, 09:24:08 AM
I found a bunch of flowers on my doorstep.  rubschin:

Maybe someone's cat died there or summat?

More likely they know you are an accident waiting to happen.
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 15, 2010, 09:27:03 AM
Can we close this thread then, I got precisely zero... as usual...  evil:

Don't fret oh Bar Man. I've only ever recieved a poxy valentine once in me entire life, and I still to this day suspect that it was from me mum when I was 11.  ::)

It's a load of old bollox anyway, problee invented by the Yanks. Shite normally is.

Any'ow, if you fancy someone, just come out and tell them straight like, no messin about with stupid cards and daft messages of sloppy crap. noooo:

The old Growler Neanderthal seduction technique eh?

I thought you bravely left notes on gerls' windscreens, like
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Snoopy on February 15, 2010, 12:58:58 PM
I blame Chaucer ~ all that birds finding their mates on Valentine's day rubbish ~ that was the start of it all.

After that turn your ire on Hallmark Cards who continue to perpetuate the crap.

And speaking of Chaucer .............................. But that's another rant that I shall save for another thread.
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 15, 2010, 01:00:24 PM
A rant about Chaucer?  eeek:

Fook me, we are getting all intere  interll brainy
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 07, 2011, 04:40:46 PM
Time to revive?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Darwins Selection on February 07, 2011, 04:47:10 PM
Time to revive?

Do you mean defibrilate?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on February 07, 2011, 04:57:18 PM
I found a bunch of flowers on my doorstep.  rubschin:

Maybe someone's cat died there or summat?

More likely they know you are an accident waiting to happen.

Umm rubschin: mourning in advance I think this idea has legs...Mournulike?  Mournopoly? Mournpoon?  I am off to find some trademarks.

The Mournpoon TM can cause the death of someone you dislike and Mournulike TM can deliver the flowers to the death scene.  Mournopoly TM is the spin off game, where each player has to discover by detection, deduction and guesswork  who did what where, how and why.

I have it sussed chaps by this time next year I will be a millionaire. cloud9:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 07, 2011, 04:58:55 PM
Mournopoly? Is that like Cluedo?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on February 07, 2011, 05:01:25 PM
More like Cluedopoly only much much betterer and far more interlecturwal.

Double six BTW.
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Pastis on February 07, 2011, 05:10:14 PM
I nearly kicked over bumped into a whole display of this stuff earlier today  eveilgrin:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.handbag.com%2Fcm%2Fhandbaguk%2Fimages%2FWZ%2For_331d5e38126536439411733.jpg&hash=fe9ef6889f5ebb57435c94163c63620152e91ab6)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on February 07, 2011, 05:34:58 PM
I nearly kicked over bumped into a whole display of this stuff earlier today  eveilgrin:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.handbag.com%2Fcm%2Fhandbaguk%2Fimages%2FWZ%2For_331d5e38126536439411733.jpg&hash=fe9ef6889f5ebb57435c94163c63620152e91ab6)


Oh good grief. sick2:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 07, 2011, 05:37:48 PM
Pop over here and I will give you one
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 07, 2011, 05:41:47 PM
Time to revive?

Do you mean defibrilate?

 drumroll:  lol:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on February 07, 2011, 05:51:52 PM
Pop over here and I will give you one

It's a very kind offer and I thank you for it but at my age I don't 'pop' anywhere.  My days of 'popping out' are long gone. sad24:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 07, 2011, 06:25:25 PM
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1354354/The-50s-having-time-love-lives.html
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 07, 2011, 06:28:23 PM
Have I got to wait til I'm 50  eeek: eeek: eeek:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 07, 2011, 06:30:01 PM
It's not that long  angel1
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 07, 2011, 06:34:16 PM
Have I got to wait til I'm 50  eeek: eeek: eeek:

You'll know what you are doing by then.  ;D
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 07, 2011, 06:37:20 PM
Have I got to wait til I'm 50  eeek: eeek: eeek:

Not long now!  point:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 07, 2011, 06:38:50 PM
7 years of nothingness then  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 07, 2011, 06:40:46 PM
7 years of nothingness then  noooo:


Aaahhh... it will fly by! happy100
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 07, 2011, 06:42:12 PM
7 years of nothingness then  noooo:


Aaahhh... it will fly by! happy100

BM never even noticed.  8)
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Demeanour on February 07, 2011, 06:43:05 PM
 lol:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 07, 2011, 06:43:59 PM
I didn't... 40 to 50 like that [clicks fingers]....  sad24:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Darwins Selection on February 08, 2011, 12:39:54 AM
I didn't... 40 to 50 like that [clicks fingers]....  sad24:
See also 50-60.

By then your fingers will click individually.  surrender:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Barman on February 08, 2011, 05:47:38 AM
I didn't... 40 to 50 like that [clicks fingers]....  sad24:
See also 50-60.

By then your fingers will click individually.  surrender:

 lol:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: tel on February 08, 2011, 10:11:20 AM
7 years of nothingness then  noooo:

7 years of preparation
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 10, 2011, 11:43:47 AM
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1355414/Valentines-Day-gift-ideas-Heart-shaped-cucumbers-sale.html (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1355414/Valentines-Day-gift-ideas-Heart-shaped-cucumbers-sale.html)
 shutup:


Maybe DS could do something involving a turnip  rubschin:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: barmisspah? on February 10, 2011, 11:48:17 AM
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1355414/Valentines-Day-gift-ideas-Heart-shaped-cucumbers-sale.html (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1355414/Valentines-Day-gift-ideas-Heart-shaped-cucumbers-sale.html)
 shutup:


Maybe DS could do something involving a turnip  rubschin:

I thought he did that last year ?
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Nick on February 10, 2011, 11:49:00 AM
They all ended up in A&E  noooo:
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on February 10, 2011, 12:09:59 PM
 happy001 happy001
Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: Darwins Selection on February 10, 2011, 01:15:42 PM
They all ended up in A&E  noooo:

Not all.

Some ended up before a magistrate, fortunately a relative and Lodge member. .

Title: Re: Heart Attack
Post by: apc2010 on February 11, 2011, 09:44:36 PM
why do Hallmark sell PACKS of valentine cards ................. rubschin: