The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Nick on January 20, 2010, 12:43:06 PM

Title: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Nick on January 20, 2010, 12:43:06 PM
Right.

The prevous occupants of House 2 have had TVs and a licence. I have no TV and therefore no licence.

I have received a stream of threatening letters about this all of which I have ignored. Today's post brings:

OFFICIAL WARNING: WE HAVE OPENED AN INVESTIGATION

This btw is printed on the outside of the fooking envelope, just to let posty know  cussing:

I think, "Fook them", but I call Bristol and find myself speaking, inevitably, to Tracey. Banghead

I say, I have no TV

Wait for it.........................


















She says, "Why not?"
 Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9: Angry9:

Let them come round in an armed raid!  Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 20, 2010, 01:19:01 PM
I'd ignore it and wait 'til they turn up looking for the telly...  ;)
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Nick on January 20, 2010, 01:21:52 PM
There are 2 tellies here but they don't werk. I have just cut the plugs off!  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 20, 2010, 01:26:32 PM
There are 2 tellies here but they don't werk. I have just cut the plugs off!  eveilgrin:

I'm not sure they'll be convinced by that...  noooo:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Nick on January 20, 2010, 01:29:16 PM
The small one is in the bin, the ancient mahoosive one won't fit.

Let them try to watch it  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 20, 2010, 01:32:31 PM
The small one is in the bin, the ancient mahoosive one won't fit.

Let them try to watch it  eveilgrin:

I don't think they can demand access to your home anyway can they...?
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Nick on January 20, 2010, 01:34:30 PM
I believe there are blogs about this. Wasn't that twat Noel Edmunds refusing to pay at some point?

The letter says "out Enforcement Division"  scared2: (do they wear camouflage clothing?) will schedule a visit. They can go eat their pants!
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 20, 2010, 01:37:14 PM
I believe there are blogs about this. Wasn't that twat Noel Edmunds refusing to pay at some point?

The letter says "out Enforcement Division"  scared2: (do they wear camouflage clothing?) will schedule a visit. They can go eat their pants!

I'd cover yourself by writing them a latter (registered) stating that you have no telly...  ;)
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: GROWLER on January 20, 2010, 02:20:56 PM
I got nicked and fined 60 snotters 18 years ago for having a B&W licence with a colour telly.
Got away with it for nearly 20 years, so I thoiught that was still actually quite good value for money tbqatd'h. happy088
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 20, 2010, 02:31:19 PM
I got nicked and fined 60 snotters 18 years ago for having a B&W licence with a colour telly.
Got away with it for nearly 20 years, so I thoiught that was still actually quite good value for money tbqatd'h. happy088

Analogue was it...?
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: GROWLER on January 20, 2010, 02:34:12 PM
I got nicked and fined 60 snotters 18 years ago for having a B&W licence with a colour telly.
Got away with it for nearly 20 years, so I thoiught that was still actually quite good value for money tbqatd'h. happy088

Analogue was it...?

Oh yes.  cloud9:

Still got a b&w in werking condition in the loft too. Must dig it out. Could be werth a fortune now. eeek:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 20, 2010, 02:36:53 PM
I got nicked and fined 60 snotters 18 years ago for having a B&W licence with a colour telly.
Got away with it for nearly 20 years, so I thoiught that was still actually quite good value for money tbqatd'h. happy088

Analogue was it...?

Oh yes.  cloud9:

Still got a b&w in werking condition in the loft too. Must dig it out. Could be werth a fortune now. eeek:

You'll have to buy a special analogue licence for it tho - your current licence has been automatically upgraded to digi like...  whistle:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Miss Demeanour on January 20, 2010, 02:46:04 PM
Can't you call Stanley round to fix your TV's Nick  lol:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Snoopy on January 20, 2010, 03:15:15 PM
I am sure my intervention will not be welcome but the law is quite clear. Plug on or not if you have a television receiver in the premises then you MUST have a licence for it. Doesn't matter that it does not work. That is the law. Stupid I am sure but never the less your local magistrates will not be interested in the whereabouts of the plug.

As for access to your home ~ Sorry BM but you are way out of date. They can most certainly access your home and can call upon the assistance of the police if you attempt to stop them. They do not need a search warrant anymore.

Just a couple of the new offences out of the 3600+ that Labour have put on the books in 12 years. Compare that figure with the 464 new offences placed on the books by the Conservatives between 1988 and 1996
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Nick on January 20, 2010, 03:23:10 PM
Mahoosive TV now written off. I enjoyed breaking the screen. It implodes spectacularly. I have always wanted to do that  cloud9:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 20, 2010, 03:23:57 PM
Mahoosive TV now written off. I enjoyed breaking the screen. It implodes spectacularly. I have always wanted to do that  cloud9:

You'll be picking up glass for weeks!  lol:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: GROWLER on January 20, 2010, 10:53:47 PM
Mahoosive TV now written off. I enjoyed breaking the screen. It implodes spectacularly. I have always wanted to do that  cloud9:

You'll be picking up glass for weeks!  lol:


...and loads of numbers if it was digital too.

What happens if you smash a lcd screen I wonder?  rubschin:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on January 21, 2010, 03:04:41 AM
I think I know a man who might know and at a decent hour tomorrow will try and find out. razz:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 21, 2010, 04:38:15 AM
Mahoosive TV now written off. I enjoyed breaking the screen. It implodes spectacularly. I have always wanted to do that  cloud9:

You'll be picking up glass for weeks!  lol:


...and loads of numbers if it was digital too.

What happens if you smash a lcd screen I wonder?  rubschin:

All the pictures pour out onto the floor...  whistle:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Darwins Selection on January 21, 2010, 12:08:01 PM
Mahoosive TV now written off. I enjoyed breaking the screen. It implodes spectacularly. I have always wanted to do that  cloud9:

You'll be picking up glass for weeks!  lol:


...and loads of numbers if it was digital too.

What happens if you smash a lcd screen I wonder?  rubschin:

All the pictures pour out onto the floor...  whistle:

 happy001 happy001
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Nick on January 21, 2010, 12:38:47 PM
Mock not.I got 400 e mails yesterday  evil: I weighed my compooter. It got heavier as e mails came in.

What does an e mail weigh?  rubschin:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Miss Demeanour on January 21, 2010, 12:42:59 PM
Very heavy ....if it's on your mind like  whistle:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Uncle Mort on January 21, 2010, 12:51:09 PM
Mock not.I got 400 e mails yesterday  evil: I weighed my compooter. It got heavier as e mails came in.

What does an e mail weigh?  rubschin:

I'm beginning to worry about you again.  noooo:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Nick on January 21, 2010, 01:05:30 PM
Well they must weigh something. Especially the ones with mahoosive attachments. If they exist they must weigh summat. How can things exist weightlessly? EH?
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Uncle Mort on January 21, 2010, 01:26:32 PM
I could put my 'anorak' on and answer but to be honest I can't be bothered.
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Darwins Selection on January 21, 2010, 01:56:56 PM
Mock not.I got 400 e mails yesterday  evil: I weighed my compooter. It got heavier as e mails came in.

What does an e mail weigh?  rubschin:

I'm beginning to worry about you again.  noooo:

Again?

Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: GROWLER on January 21, 2010, 02:13:01 PM
Mock not.I got 400 e mails yesterday  evil: I weighed my compooter. It got heavier as e mails came in.

What does an e mail weigh?  rubschin:

I'm beginning to worry about you again.  noooo:

Again?



Nah, relax. He's quite normal for a raging bearded nutter. whistle:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 21, 2010, 03:17:10 PM
Well they must weigh something. Especially the ones with mahoosive attachments. If they exist they must weigh summat. How can things exist weightlessly? EH?

That one I forwarded from TMR must weigh a lot eh, EH?  eyes:
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: The Moan Ranger on January 21, 2010, 08:33:42 PM
Forwarded to me before I forwarded it to you. And your reply was "excellent"...

Nothing wrong with that.
Title: Re: TV Licence tosspots
Post by: Barman on January 22, 2010, 05:56:50 AM
Forwarded to me before I forwarded it to you. And your reply was "excellent"...

Nothing wrong with that.

No, I'm sure I said "excrement"....  sick2:




 whistle: