The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Miss Demeanour on September 27, 2009, 04:14:54 PM

Title: Death wish
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 27, 2009, 04:14:54 PM
So phase 1 of the redecoration master plan begins....

Before it does I decide I will go and order some new carpet that I had already looked at.

So off I pop to the shop ...go up to the bloke and say  " I would like to order some carpet please".

" Certainly madam ...come and sit at my desk so I can take your details "

So he takes down the make of the carpet and colour I want and then asks how big it is.....so I tell him how many sq metres are required.

"did your husband take the measurements madam "

 " No " I said  " I did "

"oh - we can offer a free measurement service if required madam " he kindly offered

" No thank you . I can measure the size of a room " I said , getting increasingly miffed

" Are you sure you don't want to take us up on the offer - we can have someone to do in the next couple of days " he irritatingly said

"NO " I said

" Very well madam but once it's ordered it can't be changed "


 cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:






Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 27, 2009, 04:32:22 PM
I bet after that you went home and checked the measurements again to be certain any errors were on their side. . . . .

Cue joke about women and distorted impressions of size. . . .
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 27, 2009, 04:40:06 PM
I checked twice before I left  - just in case like  lol:
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 27, 2009, 04:45:56 PM
Good girl. Very sensible
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Pastis on September 27, 2009, 05:15:27 PM
A good maxim; measure twice, cut once  8)
And if your carpet ordering is anything like your drink ordering MissD, I imagine they'll fit perfickly into the glass room  ;)
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 27, 2009, 05:28:22 PM
 lol:

I haven't had a drink in ages now.....standards are slipping  noooo:
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Pirate on September 27, 2009, 05:29:33 PM
 char048
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Snoopy on September 27, 2009, 05:29:56 PM
Drink and painting do not make good companions in my experience.  confused:
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 27, 2009, 05:30:23 PM
That's an unfortunate affliction you have there Mr Pirate  whistle:
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Pirate on September 27, 2009, 05:31:22 PM
It goes well with my eye patch
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Pastis on September 27, 2009, 05:32:08 PM
Define ages  whistle:
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 27, 2009, 05:33:21 PM
Your lawyer tendencies are coming out again Mr Pastis  lol:

Last time I had alcohol was in Cyprus  whistle:
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Barman on September 27, 2009, 05:35:20 PM
Quote from: Miss Demeanor on September 27, 2009, 05:33:21 PM
Your lawyer tendencies are coming out again Mr Pastis  lol:

Last time I had alcohol was in Cyprus  whistle:
I remember it well...  noooo:
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 27, 2009, 05:37:01 PM
I believe I had to fill in quite a lot of blanks for you the next day  happy001
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 27, 2009, 05:38:02 PM
Quote from: Miss Demeanor on September 27, 2009, 05:28:22 PM
lol:

I haven't had a drink in ages now.....standards are slipping  noooo:

A drink, no. But 8 or 9 lined up in a row, quite possibly whistle:
Title: Re: Death wish
Post by: Barman on September 27, 2009, 05:52:36 PM
Quote from: Miss Demeanor on September 27, 2009, 05:37:01 PM
I believe I had to fill in quite a lot of blanks for you the next day  happy001
redface: