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Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on September 16, 2009, 05:00:45 PM

Title: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Nick on September 16, 2009, 05:00:45 PM
I am an atheist, militantly  eveilgrin:

Mrs Nick is a Catholic. She has brought the Boy up Catholic* but he is not fooled and will rebel shortly. I keep my counsel. For now.

The Skool (very trad) has invited us to a religious service to mark the commencement of The Boy and all the other Boys proper edukashun. Skool Chapel and everything.

I don't want to go.

Should I, or not?

*I refused to attend his First Communion (big thing I gather) age 7 as I said he was too young to understand what he was doing
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Snoopy on September 16, 2009, 05:14:55 PM
That depends on why you don't want to go.

I have never attended any school play, nativity, concert, choir recital or any other event. I have attended a very few "open evenings" but both wives have preferred my absence to my company on such occasions as they both say I am "argumentative and aggressive" to the teachers. I say I am only seeking truthful answers to my concerns.
The reason I do not attend any other events at schools is that I found them acutely embarrassing as a child and still find watching children reluctantly performing embarrassing. My heart goes out to the kids and I want to shout "STOP" and take my children home. Both boys agree that they hated the whole performance thing and confess that they felt threatened by teachers when they tried to protest that they didn't want to take part.

If you feel that going would compromise your convictions and if your convictions are so anti religion that you think it worth taking a stance that we all know will not sit well with Mrs Nick then don't go. If on the other hand you can suffer in silence because The Boy wants you to be there then I think you should go. Attendance at a ritual does not bind you to the religion involved. I have attended Hindu weddings but that doesn't mean I am now a Hindu. I do believe they have a right to hold such beliefs as they wish.

I personally believe in God but I have a strong dislike of organised religion which is, I feel, responsible for more trouble in this world than any other single factor. That does not stop me going to Harvest Festival if my kids want me there. It did not stop me "giving away" my daughter at her church wedding because it was what she wanted me to do (that and pay for the bloody thing)
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on September 16, 2009, 05:15:14 PM
Not IMHO but explain to boy why you are not attending
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Pastis on September 16, 2009, 05:17:25 PM
Of course you should go. You are his protector and need to be conversant with all the techniques they try to influence him with.

The last religious event I went to was a Jewish funeral just north of London; fascinating... quite moving, some bits barking but fascinating nonetheless.
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 16, 2009, 08:41:54 PM
Of course you should go. You are his protector and need to be conversant with all the techniques they try to influence him with.

Having recently had the pleasant experience of someone using the death of a close friend to try and get me to go back to church I couldnt agree more. 
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Pastis on September 16, 2009, 10:00:57 PM
Of course you should go. You are his protector and need to be conversant with all the techniques they try to influence him with.

Having recently had the pleasant experience of someone using the death of a close friend to try and get me to go back to church I couldnt agree more. 

I should have been a lawyer. In fact I nearly went down that road but my imagination got the better of me  angel1
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 16, 2009, 10:09:29 PM
Of course you should go. You are his protector and need to be conversant with all the techniques they try to influence him with.

Having recently had the pleasant experience of someone using the death of a close friend to try and get me to go back to church I couldnt agree more. 

I should have been a lawyer. In fact I nearly went down that road but my imagination got the better of me  angel1

If I hadn't been able to keep my temper in check I would have needed one.
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 17, 2009, 06:47:04 AM
If you go then do it for The Boy's sake and to be there for one of his 'big' days at school.

Tune out all the religious mumbo jumbo and focus on him - I am sure he will appreciate you being there, despite the circumstances
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 17, 2009, 07:53:03 AM
If you go then do it for The Boy's sake and to be there for one of his 'big' days at school.

Tune out all the religious mumbo jumbo and focus on him - I am sure he will appreciate you being there, despite the circumstances

I tend to agree with Miss D here.

This should not really be about expressing your stance on religion, which I am sure is well known, it is about demonstrating paternal support and not making the Boy appear 'different'.

You should go.
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Snoopy on September 17, 2009, 08:42:28 AM
Of course you should go. You are his protector and need to be conversant with all the techniques they try to influence him with.

Having recently had the pleasant experience of someone using the death of a close friend to try and get me to go back to church I couldnt agree more. 

I should have been a lawyer. In fact I nearly went down that road but my imagination got the better of me  angel1

You decided you would rather have friends than money eh?
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Pastis on September 17, 2009, 09:14:07 AM
 drumroll:

Yes
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Uncle Mort on September 17, 2009, 09:26:32 AM
The school you chose for the Boy has a chapel. Did it not cross your mind that religion may just get more than a passing nod from them?

Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Nick on September 17, 2009, 09:33:25 AM
It's a 400 year old school. I think they have had the chapel for some time
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Uncle Mort on September 17, 2009, 09:36:34 AM
Still, traditional school, chapel, 400 years old. It's more likely to be "Goodbye Mr. Chips" than "The Blackboard Jungle"

Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Nick on September 17, 2009, 09:40:32 AM
Oh yes  eveilgrin:

He forgot his PE socks the other day. 20 press ups as punishment  eveilgrin:

He won't do that again
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Uncle Mort on September 17, 2009, 09:45:03 AM
They probably use a bit of "Hell and Damnation" as well.
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Nick on September 17, 2009, 09:46:31 AM
Well religion has its uses in that respect  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Snoopy on September 17, 2009, 09:47:02 AM
You may be an atheist and The Boy may well decide to be one when he matures but to be able to make that choice he does need to be given the opportunity to see religion at work. Until he fully understands all sides of the argument he cannot make an informed choice.

IMHO parenting is all about providing opportunities and information ~ not just telling them one side of the story and expecting them to follow your lead.

In the meantime hearing a prayer or two and joining in some rousing hymn singing will do neither you nor him any harm at all. Kids love a bit of a pantomime and I know The Boy likes to sing. The Roman Church certainly provides enough smoke and mirrors to entertain children and whether you agree with the church or not you have to admit they do have some jolly good songs ~ even my two little scruffs like that bit of church going, though they draw the line at doing any readings because that smacks of performing.
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Nick on September 17, 2009, 09:48:11 AM
The Boy loves performing  noooo:

And it's CofE so Mrs Nick may have to take garlic or some bits of old bone or summat
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Snoopy on September 17, 2009, 09:48:55 AM
I wasn't only talking about the skool.

As her RS (we used to call it RK and then they changed it to RE and now it seems to be RS) lessons progressed the THW has been CoE, RC, Bhuddist, Hindu, Pacifist, Agnostic etc etc. It is going to be taught at school no matter what.

Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Pastis on September 17, 2009, 09:50:17 AM
I am waiting to use the word thurible in the Word Association thread  angel1
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Nick on September 17, 2009, 09:57:46 AM
Go right ahead
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 17, 2009, 09:58:04 AM
You may be an atheist and The Boy may well decide to be one when he matures but to be able to make that choice he does need to be given the opportunity to see religion at work. Until he fully understands all sides of the argument he cannot make an informed choice.

IMHO parenting is all about providing opportunities and information ~ not just telling them one side of the story and expecting them to follow your lead.

In the meantime hearing a prayer or two and joining in some rousing hymn singing will do neither you nor him any harm at all. Kids love a bit of a pantomime and I know The Boy likes to sing. The Roman Church certainly provides enough smoke and mirrors to entertain children and whether you agree with the church or not you have to admit they do have some jolly good songs ~ even my two little scruffs like that bit of church going, though they draw the line at doing any readings because that smacks of performing.
happ096
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 17, 2009, 09:59:14 AM
I am waiting to use the word thurible in the Word Association thread  angel1

"Gods bong"
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Pastis on September 17, 2009, 04:53:34 PM
I feel inclined to add that despite the abominable slaughter, degradation and subjugation meted out in the name of religion it has also fostered, inspired and produced the most incredibly beautiful music. How ironic  rubschin:
Title: Re: Religious ceremonies
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 17, 2009, 11:47:25 PM
I feel inclined to add that despite the abominable slaughter, degradation and subjugation meted out in the name of religion it has also fostered, inspired and produced the most incredibly beautiful music. How ironic  rubschin:

Democracy is exactly the same.

Except the bit about the music.