The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Nick on June 16, 2009, 09:25:27 PM

Title: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on June 16, 2009, 09:25:27 PM
 cussing:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/dorset/8103581.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/dorset/8103581.stm)

Quote
Gordon and Dena Coleman said they cannot leave or enter their Bournemouth flat on the Sabbath because the hallway sensors automatically switch on lights.

And they seem to be after compensation!! Banghead
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Barman on June 17, 2009, 02:52:05 AM
My understanding was that they (Jews) fitted these things specifically so that they didn't have to do any work (i.e. flick a switch) on the Sabbath?

In Israel, hotels catering for people that strictly adhere to the belief of no work on the Sabbath have them in all the rooms. Also, elevators stop and open their doors on each floor automatically so that the poor souls don't have to press a button to call it or request a floor when they get in.

Don't get me started on meat and dairy restaurants...  noooo:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on June 17, 2009, 06:52:59 AM
Or  telegraph poles with wires strung from them  noooo:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Miss Demeanour on June 17, 2009, 07:32:44 AM
What a complete and utter nonsense  cussing:

If you are that bothered then don't leave the feckin flat - or even go there. It is after all their HOLIDAY FLAT !!!!!!!.

Surely all movement should be banned if they are that corrupted by their religion and therefore shouldn't even be leaving the flat in the first place.

Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 17, 2009, 08:15:58 AM
If the lights didn't come on and they fell down the stairs on the Sabbath, would the Jewish medics have to leave them there until the next day?
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Barman on June 17, 2009, 08:16:56 AM
If the lights didn't come on and they fell down the stairs on the Sabbath, would the Jewish medics have to leave them there until the next day?
lol: lol: lol: Yes, prolly...  lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on June 17, 2009, 08:17:40 AM
No, they would insist on a Gentile crew. Makes you wonder how they get on in Israel though, with housefires and such  rubschin:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 17, 2009, 08:21:57 AM
No, they would insist on a Gentile crew. Makes you wonder how they get on in Israel though, with housefires and such  rubschin:
How would they insist anything?

They couldn't use the phone any more than the light switch.
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on June 17, 2009, 08:22:27 AM
Are they allowed to shout?  rubschin:

Blimey:

Quote
The thirty-nine activities
5.1 Planting
5.2 Plowing
5.3 Reaping
5.4 Binding sheaves
5.5 Threshing
5.6 Winnowing
5.7 Selecting
5.8 Grinding
5.9 Sifting
5.10 Kneading
5.11 Baking
5.12 Shearing wool
5.13 Washing wool
5.14 Beating wool
5.15 Dyeing
5.16 Spinning
5.17 Weaving
5.18 Making two loops
5.19 Weaving at least two threads
5.20 Separating two threads
5.21 Tying
5.22 Untying
5.23 Sewing at least two stitches
5.24 Tearing for the purpose of sewing
5.25 Trapping
5.26 Slaughtering
5.27 Flaying
5.28 Salting meat
5.29 Curing hide
5.30 Scraping hide
5.31 Cutting hide into pieces
5.32 Writing two or more letters
5.33 Erasing
5.34 Building
5.35 Tearing something down
5.36 Extinguishing a fire
5.37 Igniting a fire
5.38 Applying the finishing touch
5.39 Transferring between domains

Making two loops? rubschin:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Barman on June 17, 2009, 08:30:24 AM
Quote
5.36 Extinguishing a fire

 lol: lol: lol:

That would really test your faith!
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on June 17, 2009, 09:06:47 AM
Dial 999

Fire please

Can you pop round later? My house is burning down  scared2: Tomorrow will do
 noooo:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Barman on June 17, 2009, 09:09:05 AM
Bizarre... They've got all that old fashioned stuff about sewing and scraping hides then just one about the Intermong right at the end...  rubschin:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on June 17, 2009, 09:09:30 AM
 drumroll:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on June 17, 2009, 09:24:18 AM
Are they allowed to shout?  rubschin:

Blimey:

Quote
The thirty-nine activities
5.1 Planting
5.2 Plowing
5.3 Reaping
5.4 Binding sheaves
5.5 Threshing
5.6 Winnowing
5.7 Selecting
5.8 Grinding
5.9 Sifting
5.10 Kneading
5.11 Baking
5.12 Shearing wool
5.13 Washing wool
5.14 Beating wool
5.15 Dyeing
5.16 Spinning
5.17 Weaving
5.18 Making two loops
5.19 Weaving at least two threads
5.20 Separating two threads
5.21 Tying
5.22 Untying
5.23 Sewing at least two stitches
5.24 Tearing for the purpose of sewing
5.25 Trapping
5.26 Slaughtering
5.27 Flaying
5.28 Salting meat
5.29 Curing hide
5.30 Scraping hide
5.31 Cutting hide into pieces
5.32 Writing two or more letters
5.33 Erasing
5.34 Building
5.35 Tearing something down
5.36 Extinguishing a fire
5.37 Igniting a fire
5.38 Applying the finishing touch
5.39 Transferring between domains

Making two loops? rubschin:



That will be where the not switching the lights on comes into play, though why you would need two ring mains in a flat is beyond me. noooo:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on June 17, 2009, 09:24:57 AM
Did Moses have electricity? In the tents like?
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on June 17, 2009, 09:57:31 AM
Prolly not, but he was a wise man and prolly foresaw the future. Shrugs:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Snoopy on June 17, 2009, 11:42:11 AM
He had ARK LAMPS!
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on June 17, 2009, 11:42:34 AM
I thought that was Noah  rubschin:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Snoopy on June 17, 2009, 11:43:15 AM
Who cares about accuracy ~ applaud the joke!
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on June 17, 2009, 11:44:02 AM
Oh, it was a joke. I see. Jolly good.
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Uncle Mort on June 17, 2009, 12:05:40 PM
Keep taking the tablets (as God said to Moses)
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Barman on June 17, 2009, 12:06:33 PM
Keep taking the tablets (as God said to Moses)
drumroll:
Title: Re: More religious nutters!!
Post by: Nick on August 12, 2009, 12:22:10 PM
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/8196786.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/8196786.stm)

Another classic piece of god bothering! Why the feck did they need a plane? Don't their flying carpets werk?