The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Berek on June 20, 2007, 11:03:03 PM

Title: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Berek on June 20, 2007, 11:03:03 PM
after 6 pints with one of my marras I decided to carry on with the painting of the hallway *1

Being pissed AND lazy I have decided not to cover anything to protect from splashes

Mrs C has left her " good " jacket draped over the banister..

I paint the wall

I close the tin of paint

some " spraying " of paint occurs.. in the direction of said jacket..

 scared2: scared2: scared2: scared2:

 whistle:














*1 One of the jobs off the " list "
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: GROWLER on June 20, 2007, 11:24:07 PM
Man or mouse?

TELL her that you've got paint on her jacket, but don't look or sound sheepish telling her.
Try and turn it 'round and blame her for not putting her jacket away knowing that you're doin' the decorating.

Sorted. eveilgrin:

Anyway, if it was just a nice bit of magnolian emulsion, just chuck it in a bucket of soapy water for the night. That'll sort it.
Bit of agitataion in the mornin' will get shut of the paint once it's loosened it up a bit
Then simply hang it out to dry  and you'll be laughin'.

What would you do without my Top Tips ey? ::)
Always here to help. Just ask. ;)
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Berek on June 21, 2007, 06:34:01 AM
 drumroll:
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: GROWLER on June 21, 2007, 07:29:59 AM
drumroll:

Well?
WTF does  drumroll: mean man?

She obviously didn't kill you then. My advice werk I presume?
Lafin!
Always here to help. ;)
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 21, 2007, 07:47:53 AM
1. Think of the tartiest woman that the wife hates most, lets call her Sheila.

2. Tell wife you saw Sheila wearing an identical jacket while snogging a Jamaican in the alley at the side of the pub.

3. Offer to drive wife and jacket to the Oxfam shop.
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Berek on June 21, 2007, 08:58:55 AM
1. Think of the tartiest woman that the wife hates most, lets call her Sheila.

2. Tell wife you saw Sheila wearing an identical jacket while snogging a Jamaican in the alley at the side of the pub.

3. Offer to drive wife and jacket to the Oxfam shop.

excellent advice ! drumroll:
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Nick on June 21, 2007, 09:35:17 AM
Painting while pissed. I did that once and destroyed a television cry:
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 21, 2007, 09:52:48 AM
On the other hand take the coat to the dry cleaners and then tell Mrs C whats happened. Such a display of unberek like behaviour will have her knocking herself out to find out what else it is you are hiding so the coat will no longer be an issue.  eyes:
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Berek on June 21, 2007, 10:23:39 AM
I think I may dispose of the coat and tell her she took it with her, perhaps she has left it in the hotel ? whistle:

Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 21, 2007, 10:33:41 AM
On the other hand take the coat to the dry cleaners and then tell Mrs C whats happened. Such a display of unberek like behaviour will have her knocking herself out to find out what else it is you are hiding so the coat will no longer be an issue.  eyes:

That will just convince her that he is seeing 'Sheila'. noooo:
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 21, 2007, 10:49:52 AM
yes but she'll be spending so much effort in finding out who 'sheila' is that he'll be able to get away with blue murder in other areas. Misdirection is the secret of an easy life  eyes:
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 21, 2007, 10:51:04 AM
yes but she'll be spending so much effort in finding out who 'sheila' is that he'll be able to get away with blue murder in other areas. Misdirection is the secret of an easy life  eyes:

You are Geoffrey Archer and I claim my ?5
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 21, 2007, 10:54:42 AM
 Angry9: cussing: whip: fence: thatsit: freddy: sex014

How dare you say I'm that argument for contraception.

SMITE

 eveilgrin:
Title: Re: She'll F***ing kill me !!!
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 21, 2007, 10:57:35 AM
Angry9: cussing: whip: fence: thatsit: freddy: sex014

How dare you say I'm that argument for contraception.

SMITE

 eveilgrin:

Sorry, with hindsight that was a bit strong. redface: