The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Comedy Room => Topic started by: Snoopy on April 02, 2009, 05:16:05 PM
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A little old lady, slowly enters the front door of a sex shop.
Obviously very unstable on her feet, she wobbles the few feet across the store to the counter.
Finally arriving at the counter and grabbing it for support, stuttering, she asks the salesman:
"Dddooo youuuu hhhave ddddiillldosss?"
The salesman, politely trying not to burst out laughing, replies, "Yes we do have dildos. Actually we carry many different models."
The old lady then asks: "Ddddoooo yyyouuuu cccarrry aaa pppinnkk oonnee, ttteeennn iincches lllong aaanndd aabbbooouutt ttwwoo iincchess tthiicck...aaand rruuns bbby bbbaatteerrieeess?'
The clerk responds: "Yes we do."
"Ddddooo yyyoouuu kknnooww hhhooww tttooo ttuuurrnn tthhe sssunnoffaaabbiittch offff?" she asks.
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;D <snigger>
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A couple are sat up late on a saturday night waiting for their son to return home from his first date. They are getting anxious as he had been extremely nervous before going out and throughout his life had always been oif a nervous disposition and lacked self confidence.
Eventually he comes in smiling saying " Mum, Dad guess what ? .. I had sex tonight for the first time and it was totally amazing"
The dad replies "oh that's great news son , that's a reason to celebrate. You are a man now, dead proud of you I am - so in recognition of this I will buy you that motorbike you wanted but you will have to wait until pay day as I'm a bit stretched at the moment "
"No problem" says the son - "!'m a bit stretched meself , anyway my arse is to sore to ride a bike right now"
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A couple are sat up late on a saturday night waiting for their son to return home from his first date. They are getting anxious as he had been extremely nervous before going out and throughout his life had always been oif a nervous disposition and lacked self confidence.
Eventually he comes in smiling saying " Mum, Dad guess what ? .. I had sex tonight for the first time and it was totally amazing"
The dad replies "oh that's great news son , that's a reason to celebrate. You are a man now, dead proud of you I am - so in recognition of this I will buy you that motorbike you wanted but you will have to wait until pay day as I'm a bit stretched at the moment "
"No problem" says the son - "!'m a bit stretched meself , anyway my arse is to sore to ride a bike right now"
lol: lol: lol: