The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Grumpmeister on June 19, 2007, 04:51:26 PM

Title: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 19, 2007, 04:51:26 PM

Seeing as Mornington Crescent was so popular on here I thought I'd give this one a go.

Just for Wenchy when she returns, the rule is to take a well known word and come up with a new definition  eyes:

To start you off:

Dialogue - A really bad piece of timber.

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 19, 2007, 06:43:07 PM

Forthright=TomTom directions to Mornington Crescent.

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 19, 2007, 09:16:33 PM

Semantics = Involuntary facial twitches in sailors.
Stabilise = CCTV for equestrians.
Decimate = Fornicate with every tenth woman
Dessicant = Required to Decimate
Cacophony = Careless use of toilet paper by a woman.

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Berek on June 19, 2007, 11:22:03 PM

 censored:

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Misunderstood on June 19, 2007, 11:26:31 PM

Pauper = A happy pussycat.

Analogue = Dense woman.

Latent = Tardy insect.

Dog = A dyslexic deity.

Interview = Windows

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 20, 2007, 08:37:08 AM

Bahrain = Severe weather warning for sheep.

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 11:00:04 AM

Parapsychology - The study of madness in base jumpers by sifting through bits of brain on the pavement

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 20, 2007, 11:50:15 AM

tangential = nude sunbathing

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 20, 2007, 11:59:12 AM

stagnant = TV presenter Dec replaced by male deer.

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 12:27:34 PM

Dextrous - Support for aforementioned TV presenter

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 20, 2007, 12:41:25 PM

Decade - Soft drink made from aforementioned TV presenter

Decahedron - TV presenter head-butts Macdonalds clown

 

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 01:47:32 PM

Taffeta - Welsh goat's cheese

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 01:56:17 PM

Medieval - Patricia Hewitt

Countryside - Shooting Tony Blair

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 02:23:37 PM

Warming - Geordie Porcelain

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 20, 2007, 02:43:16 PM

Quote from: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 02:23:37 PM

Warming - Geordie Porcelain

I particularly like that one. lol:


Have the clap.

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 20, 2007, 02:49:37 PM

Stipulate = Patron saint of tardiness.
Stegosaurus = Patron saint of treating your own piles.
Condiment = Interpretation of American politicians.

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 03:01:28 PM

Forbear - "Watch out, Growler is playing golf"

Rancour - Japanese term of abuse

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 03:14:45 PM

Shambolic - False testicle

Kinship - Last words of the captain of the Titanic

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 03:25:48 PM

Country Park - Often heard in instances where a 4x4 has taken up more than one space.

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 20, 2007, 06:51:59 PM

Specimen - Italian astronaut

Bacchanalian - Bet on the outsider in the Indyplanetary 500

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Darwins Selection on June 20, 2007, 07:02:28 PM

Innuendo - Italian suppository

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Misunderstood on June 21, 2007, 12:14:30 AM

Quote from: Darwins Selection on June 20, 2007, 07:02:28 PM

Innuendo - Italian suppository

 ;D ;D ;D

Title: Re: The Uxbridge English Dictionary
Post by: Grumpmeister on June 21, 2007, 03:34:23 PM

Collonade - A fizzy enema

Abbatoir - 3 in a bed in a monestary

Turpentine - A Geordie highwayman

Direction - Aroused Welshman

Merciful - Liverpool's flooded