The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Miss Demeanour on March 24, 2009, 01:49:09 PM
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Don't you just love em noooo:
We had an unplanned one this morning - every time , every single bloody time it is just chaos noooo:
I work in a large building of over 20 floors. The alarm goes off. Everyone looks around confused , have to double check it is not Monday and 9.30 , which is when we have our weekly test.
Having established that it is in fact Tuesday (this has by now taken over 3 minutes) we then start the preparing to go outside routine.
This consists of the task of collecting your coat, retrieving your bag - ohh where did I put my mobile and for those that smoke you can witness the desperate grabbing of the packet as they suddenly realise they will have a window of opportunity ahead.
Once you think you have everything you then start to head in the direction of the staircase - oh no - hold on I forgot my pass. Can't get back in the building without. So return to desk, ferret out papers, find discarded pass. Whilst back at desk look around to see if there is anything else you need. Satisfied you finally have everything walk once more towards the staircase.
By this time a non too orderly queue has formed to go down the stairs, joined by occupants of all the other floors. The slow shuffle begins. You then see people you haven't seen in ages "Hi, how's you " and so the staircase conversations begin. By the time you have reached the ground floor you know that they had to have an epidural for the birth of their second son and the scarring hasn't gone yet eeek:.
Head towards the light and filter out into the cold. Look around casually wondering where you should go to next and follow the cattle in the general direction of where they are going. This seems to be towards Costa Coffee and the queue is now forming around the block.
Stand around in groups on the street blocking the pavements and causing tourists to stop, thinking there is something worth seeing noooo: Once they have moved on, a class of school children head our way. They try and find their way through.Note the panic on teachers faces as they have not been trained in crowd control desperately trying to regroup their little fledgings they tut and push their way past .
There begins 30 minutes of waiting outside the building or trying to get a seat in a local coffee shop. When finally someone in a hi vis jacket outside the building , waves his arms ( the universal sign of everything being safe for you to return ), the cattle start shuffling back.
No one wanting to walk up x number of flights of stairs though - so the queues for the lifts now take shape. 20 minutes just to be able to get in a lift. Those that do opt for the staircase back up route, look like they need oxygen and a defibrillator when they return to their desk.
God help us if at any time it's a real one noooo:
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It sounds oh so familiar Miss D.
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Time off werk, like!
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My dad used to "run" the NatWest Tower - he always ensured that fire drills happened on a Friday afternoon when the vast majority of staff had had a few beers lol: Would you fancy walking down 39 flights with a full belly. And back up again lol:
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There prolly wasn't that many people in the building on a Friday if it's anything like this place noooo:
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I just had my council tax bill!! evil:
£2,400? cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:
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point:
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Did anybody see that Horizon programme last week about surviving a disaster...?
Dumbed down as usual but the interesting things was that almost all employees of Merrill Lynch (who held regular fire drills) survived the twin towers disaster...
Those in companies that didn't faffed around, collected their fags, telephoned their mates on other floors to find out what was going on perished...
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I just had my council tax bill!! evil:
£2,400? cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:
And?
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And I have to pay the bastards! cussing: cussing: cussing:
OK?
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Don't we all?
I got mine yesterday ~ did I come on here complaining?
Tax is a fact of life ~ live with it or move to somewhere cheaper.
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cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:
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Or get a divorce, I get a 50% reduction for single adult occupancy.
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Does murder count?
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I just had my council tax bill!! evil:
£2,400? cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing: cussing:
How do you think they fund a car full of policemen eating doughnuts sitting outside the pub every night of the week...? whistle:
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Does murder count?
I don't think the incarcerated pay council tax.
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Sounds appealing rubschin:
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Or get a divorce, I get a 50% reduction for single adult occupancy.
I only get 25% reduction for the same thing - that' s sooooo not fair sad32:
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ooops! so do I.
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Well that's alright then
I'll stop having my hissy fit now lol:
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I got about 5 secs into my hissy fit when reading that... 25% off here too
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Did anybody see that Horizon programme last week about surviving a disaster...?
Dumbed down as usual but the interesting things was that almost all employees of Merrill Lynch (who held regular fire drills) survived the twin towers disaster...
Those in companies that didn't faffed around, collected their fags, telephoned their mates on other floors to find out what was going on perished...
If memory serves me correctly the guy in charge of security for the Merril Lynch mob was a guy from Cornwall who had gained American citizenship after military service and was convinced that the towers would be hit by terrorists again so wanted everyone prepared.