The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Miss Demeanour on March 16, 2009, 05:12:52 PM

Title: Slam
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 16, 2009, 05:12:52 PM
Closing a door - what is so difficult about this long forgotten art  ?evil:

The Brat cannot master this and the next door neighbours are feckin useless.  cussing:

Instead of getting hold of the door by the handle, letterbox etc and slamming it with a G force that NASA would be proud of , why can't this just be pulled to and then gently closed shut.

No need for the pictures to fall off the walls.

For the dead to be woken from their sleep.

For glass panels to have to be replaced  evil:

It is such a simple task  noooo:

oohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh   evil: evil: evil:

Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Grumpmeister on March 16, 2009, 05:14:45 PM
So start slamming doors and crashing around at the weekend when the brat is still in bed. It may not help but it should make you feel better.  whistle:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Barman on March 16, 2009, 05:14:55 PM
Did the door slamming perhaps break the freezer like...?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 16, 2009, 05:19:23 PM
So start slamming doors and crashing around at the weekend when the brat is still in bed. It may not help but it should make you feel better.  whistle:

Nothing would raise that zombie from her sleep I'm afraid GM noooo:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 16, 2009, 05:20:42 PM
Did the door slamming perhaps break the freezer like...?  rubschin:

You're brave now - we'll see about that in a few weeks time  evil:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Barman on March 16, 2009, 05:22:48 PM
Did the door slamming perhaps break the freezer like...?  rubschin:

You're brave now - we'll see about that in a few weeks time  evil:
scared2:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 16, 2009, 06:26:51 PM
The Boy is a slammer. The whole house shakes and plaster drifts from the ceiling  cussing:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Grumpmeister on March 16, 2009, 06:41:45 PM
So start slamming doors and crashing around at the weekend when the brat is still in bed. It may not help but it should make you feel better.  whistle:

Nothing would raise that zombie from her sleep I'm afraid GM noooo:

I'm sure a bucket of icewater would have her up in record time...  whistle:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Snoopy on March 16, 2009, 06:55:02 PM
Opposite and related problems

None of my household except me angel1 will ever close a door. All doors are open at all times. I am forever walking round bellowing at them and closing the doors. OK in the summer but this is a barn of a house and heating it cost me almost £2k last year. Shut the damned doors and watch the oil bills tumble. cussing:

Related grump ~ Light switches have two positions ~ On and Off. If you leave the room and there is no-one else in it turn the lights OFF.
SWWLTBO has just taken boys to cubs. THW and I are alone in the house. I just walked round and found 15 fecking bulbs burning brightly. The room I am using has one bulb and the one she is in has three. Why are all the others on? Banghead
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 16, 2009, 07:00:31 PM
Lights being left on - that does my head in  noooo:

It can be broad daylight , and The Brat will come into the front room and turn the main light on. What the feck for  thatsit:

Go into the kitchen , turn the main lights on but also the under unit ones on - one or the feckin other I am always shouting.

Her bedroom - main light , bedside lamp, desk lamp  noooo:

I'm surprised we don't have planes landing on our roof  evil:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Darwins Selection on March 16, 2009, 07:03:14 PM
Remove the bulbs.
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Snoopy on March 16, 2009, 07:07:53 PM
Tempting.
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Pastis on March 16, 2009, 07:28:25 PM
I kept reading this thread title as Siam   redface:

But since I'm now here... neighbours party last Friday night.... slamming doors at 4am Saturday  evil:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 16, 2009, 07:33:37 PM
I hope you were invited  rubschin:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Bar Wench on March 16, 2009, 07:34:08 PM
Remove the bulbs.

My Dad did that. He also took my bedroom door off the hinges for slamming related issues.  redface:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 16, 2009, 07:35:25 PM
I can't imagine you throwing a strop Wenchy  lol:

But removing your privacy altogether  eeek: eeek: eeek:

Now's there's a thought  rubschin:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Bar Wench on March 16, 2009, 08:22:19 PM
It happened another time for secrecy issues too. I'd been smoking in there. So the door came off again.  noooo:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: The Moan Ranger on March 16, 2009, 09:23:36 PM
Yonks ago, in another place, a certain OH mentioned that due to door slamming, he removed all the internal doors from his house. He only replaced them when they guaranteed that all doors would, in future, be gentle use of the handle.

It worked.

My youngest (13) is currently slamming her door - and the same will happen, albeit with the addition of a bonfire in the garden in which the door is burnt along with "her" mobile phone, laptop, LCD TV, stereo, I-Pod and any clothing on the floor.  cussing:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: GROWLER on March 16, 2009, 10:30:58 PM
All the same here MD. ::)
I'm thouroughly sick and very tired of it all.

I dream of living in me 'ut in the woods, on me own with just a one eyed snarlin' dog for company, with no leccy, and NO BASTARD DOORS TO SLAM! Angry9:

I've threatened to do what OH did, but where am I going to store 12 doors?
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on March 17, 2009, 08:15:24 AM
12 doors = either 1 hut or 1 extention to existing hut. ;)
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Barman on March 17, 2009, 08:22:35 AM
12 doors = either 1 hut or 1 extention to existing hut. ;)
Or a bloody great bonfire...  happy088
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 17, 2009, 08:38:46 AM
I removed the internal kitchen door for about 2 years for slamming related reasons  evil:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 17, 2009, 08:41:44 AM
Did Mrs Nick learn her lesson  rubschin:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 17, 2009, 08:47:31 AM
Very droll!  ::)

She phoned from Libya last night. Woke me up, like  evil:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 17, 2009, 08:50:53 AM
She enjoying her stay ???
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 17, 2009, 08:54:27 AM
I am!  evil:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: GROWLER on March 17, 2009, 09:20:57 AM
Very droll!  ::)

She phoned from Libya last night. Woke me up, like  evil:

At 5:30 PM?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Darwins Selection on March 17, 2009, 09:23:55 AM
I removed the internal kitchen door . . .

You have an external kitchen as well?

 worthy:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: GROWLER on March 17, 2009, 09:28:30 AM
I removed the internal kitchen door . . .

You have an external kitchen as well?

 worthy:

You think THAT'S cool? You wanna see his front garden! eeek:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: GROWLER on March 17, 2009, 09:32:39 AM
Just thought I'd google it, and his mansion is actually pictured on Google images!! eeek:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Snoopy on March 17, 2009, 10:08:57 AM
I know but I declined to publish it for reasons of privacy.

Same as Wenchy's back garden  whistle:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Uncle Mort on March 17, 2009, 10:12:18 AM
I know but I declined to publish it for reasons of privacy.

Same as Wenchy's back garden  whistle:

Surely that's for reasons of good taste.  ;)
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Snoopy on March 17, 2009, 10:17:52 AM
Washing on the line  eeek:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: GROWLER on March 17, 2009, 11:04:05 AM
Here's mine. Find me if you can.  cloud9:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi27.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fc172%2Fb0nz0%2Fshedinthewoods.jpg&hash=a27d4051f900b12029db36cb5b52ea441c84d5e3)
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 17, 2009, 11:04:22 AM
Very droll!  ::)

She phoned from Libya last night. Woke me up, like  evil:

At 5:30 PM?  rubschin:

She phoned again much later!!
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: GROWLER on March 17, 2009, 11:06:03 AM
Very droll!  ::)

She phoned from Libya last night. Woke me up, like  evil:

At 5:30 PM?  rubschin:

She phoned again much later!!

Oh, luuuurve is it?  sick2:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 17, 2009, 11:06:35 AM
No, she wanted to speak to The Boy. Call woke him up too  evil:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: GROWLER on March 17, 2009, 11:12:28 AM
No, she wanted to speak to The Boy. Call woke him up too  evil:

Well yea, you would say that wouldn't you.

She rang you up to tell you how much she's missing you, DIDN'T she? Ahhhhhh, sweet as a spring nut.  cloud9:












 sick2:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 17, 2009, 11:14:37 AM
She was complaining about being covered in sand, actually  rubschin:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: GROWLER on March 17, 2009, 11:17:30 AM
She was complaining about being covered in sand, actually  rubschin:

Been on the beach late at night ey?  eyes:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Barman on March 17, 2009, 11:17:38 AM
She was complaining about being covered in sand, actually  rubschin:
Did you say "I love you too" at the end tho like...?
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 17, 2009, 11:18:58 AM
No, I told her about my rash  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: GROWLER on March 17, 2009, 11:22:41 AM
No, I told her about my rash  eveilgrin:

Well we'll all sit back and let you tell US all about it now. Popcorn:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Barman on March 17, 2009, 11:23:44 AM
No, I told her about all my rash decisions today
Oh...  noooo:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 17, 2009, 11:28:31 AM
No, I told her about my rash  eveilgrin:

Well we'll all sit back and let you tell US all about it now. Popcorn:

I have photographed it (using a mirror on a stick) and have posted said pics off to Rashes'R'Us for diagnosis, like.
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 17, 2009, 11:39:12 AM
We await imminent news of the contamination unit being erected around your house  scared2:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Nick on March 17, 2009, 11:40:51 AM
My house is already contaminated  evil:
Title: Re: Slam
Post by: Darwins Selection on March 17, 2009, 11:49:29 AM
I know but I declined to publish it for reasons of privacy.

Same as Wenchy's back garden  whistle:

As I remember she didn't hesitate to post a picture of her passage full of snow?