The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Darwins Selection on June 01, 2007, 11:54:56 AM
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I assume Barman is having a birthday treat, perhaps provided by wench.
There is a very, very large cake on a trolley in the corridor outside the gents and there are faint sounds of the 'Volga Boatman' being sung inside it.
Our birthday boy is certainly popular as I answered the phone for him and apparently some chaps from the Inland Revenue have a surprise arranged for him today as well.
Meanwhile, it seems to be 'help yourself day' in the snug.
That gang of Liverpudliar roofers in the public bar are getting rather rowdy as they drink their way through a pile of cash they got from "some daft Count" who has recently been fleeced over repairs to the roof, presumably of his stately home?
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cussing:
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The barman was up very early, singing "Happy Birthday to Me" and sobbing into his hankie.
I assume some outing was planned for the day as I have not heard from him since.
Other news of the day is that I was, at 11.05hrs, barred from the "Other Place"
Not seen nor heard from Wench but wasn't she going to the garden centre today?
The "Other Place" is also very quiet.
Numbers have popped in, had a read and vanished without a word throughout the morning.
As for the Liverpudlian Roofers ~ least said, soonest mended would seem the best policy there. Mrs Nick will no doubt have much to say over the weekend and, I am confident, Nick will give us a digest in time.
I note that Nick has given us the first update as I have been typing.
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I feel a call to Trading Standards coming on. evil:
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I assume some outing was planned for the day
Anyone we know? eyes:
Barred eh? You old troublemaker. ;)
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I?m back!
Been out since early ? birthday treat ? bought myself two new spanners and some nuts. noooo:
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I?m back!
Been out since early ? birthday treat ? bought myself two new spanners and some nuts. noooo:
By 'eck lad ~ tha knows 'ow t'live! ::)
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I?m back!
Been out since early ? birthday treat ? bought myself two new spanners and some nuts. noooo:
By 'eck lad ~ tha knows 'ow t'live! ::)
I know!
For Christmas I am getting the bolts too! cloud9:
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I?m back!
Been out since early ? birthday treat ? bought myself two new spanners and some nuts. noooo:
Well those neck bolts do rust with age from what I've heard old boy drumroll:
Happy birthday happy088
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I?m back!
Been out since early ? birthday treat ? bought myself two new spanners and some nuts. noooo:
Well those neck bolts do rust with age from what I've heard old boy drumroll:
Happy birthday happy088
Thanks!
How spontaneous and unexpected from you all! cloud9:
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'Appy Birthday Barman! I see you celebrate it along with the 40th anniversary of Sgt. Pepper's.
cue song... lots to choose from, LSD, Lovely Rita, When I'm 47 64 ;)
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Steady on ~ He'll be insufferable next year if we keep this up!
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lol: He's got another 6 hours max and then that's it. Finito. Back behind the pumps ;)
And as for being quiet... end of quarter Vat return for HM Custard & Excess, end of month invoicing and, just because I said I'm working abroad for a couple of weeks my 'lovely' customers (bless 'em) are throwing stuff at me like there's no tomorrow. Anyway, that's my excuse redface:
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Bear in mind he's already behind the pumps and judging from the way he's swaying there may not be much left in the cellar eyes:
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Just got him back to -100. And why has my e mail died??? evil: evil: evil: evil:
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Email or PM?
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E mail. Having to use webmail.
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Just got him back to -100. And why has my e mail died??? evil: evil: evil: evil:
Nick + Computers = pcwhack: while the rest of us scared:
Need I say more eyes:
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This doesn't merit a separate thread but I read in the last day or so that Tinky Winky was being investigated on grounds of subliminal gay messages eeek:
Guess what country?
Poland - ha - Po-land - ha!
ok, please yerselves...
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He is Gay. I have seen the videos
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The reuters headline was they were probing the tellytubbies eeek:
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The little one is that Chinese Girl off CBBC
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The little one is that Chinese Girl off CBBC
OK, plobing the teletubbies.
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or even plobing the terrytubbies 8)
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or even plobing the terrytubbies 8)
lol:
Blavo!
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Seeing as it's still quiet... sleep017
I was once being taken around the National Museum in Tapei and after a couple of hours was clearly showing signs of needing refreshment redface:. My ever hospitable guide enquired if I was hungry then we should eat snake eeek:. I declined, but she persisted and within a short time we were out on the street in search of same. Imagine my apprehension when she exclaimed:
"Look! We can eat snake here". I looked up at the sign...
RESTAURANT & SNACK BAR
lol:
I did eventually succumb some time later and yes, as I'm sure you all know - it does taste like chicken ;)
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As do Babies, I am told
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As do Babies, I am told
eeek:
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Seeing as it's still quiet... sleep017
I was once being taken around the National Museum in Tapei and after a couple of hours was clearly showing signs of needing refreshment redface:. My ever hospitable guide enquired if I was hungry then we should eat snake eeek:. I declined, but she persisted and within a short time we were out on the street in search of same. Imagine my apprehension when she exclaimed:
"Look! We can eat snake here". I looked up at the sign...
RESTAURANT & SNACK BAR
I did eventually succumb some time later and yes, as I'm sure you all know - it does taste like chicken ;)
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi112.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fn189%2FDarwins_photos%2Ffunny4.jpg&hash=4dda2a0eebea55614196936297e6a35307288999)
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eeek: eeek: lol: lol: lol: lol:
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Very quiet today. I assume everyone is out having fun. Everyone except me clearly cry:
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Very quiet today. I assume everyone is out having fun. Everyone except me clearly cry:
Indeed!
I was up early o?clock this morning and off to work ? fitted a new satellite system for a customer who was soooo delighted with it! Makes a nice change eh? No doubt it will end in tears? noooo:
Nice3 to see that most of us have better things to do than sit in here all day tho ? no doubt we?ll be back to it tomorrow on work?s time?
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I will be on the 'phone all day tomorrow to a wide and interesting range of idiots cussing:
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I will be on the 'phone all day tomorrow to a wide and interesting range of idiots cussing:
Oh we look forward to seeing you in here then - much better than listening to on-hold muzak. whistle:
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Sorry I am late I missed the bus.. Happy Birthday Barman
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Sorry I am late I missed the bus.. Happy Birthday Barman
You are forgiven and applauded for your birthday wishes! Thank you. cloud9:
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Sorry I am late I missed the bus.. Happy Birthday Barman
You are forgiven and applauded for your birthday wishes! Thank you. cloud9:
Was there a birthday?
Any cake left?
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No Bar Wench finishes up all the leftovers.
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No Bar Wench finishes up all the leftovers.
Leftovers? rubschin:
I haven?t seen the cake she promised yet ? let alone any ?leftovers?. sad24:
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The BF gets the crumbs. But only in his role as a human hoover. Poor boy.
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I haven?t seen the cake she promised yet ? let alone any ?leftovers?. sad24:
Are you jumping to conclusions perhaps?
She actually promised "Something sweet and tasty with a candle in it".
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It was cake!
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi18.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fb107%2Fjollyholly2005%2Fcake-1.jpg&hash=d393ca4ad7b9bd225b44b4f4a2d4adc6c4378608)
and fairy cakes
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi18.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fb107%2Fjollyholly2005%2Fcake.jpg&hash=a9e81394e77bfa93cd95465d51ddead63a72d897)
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Leftovers from Easter?
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bbc.co.uk%2Fhome%2Fimages%2Fmain_promo%2Fbbc7%2Fhalloween_pumpkin_l_1.jpg&hash=bda8256adbe2c9c7dc60e54454760a066bd98744)
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It was cake!
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi18.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fb107%2Fjollyholly2005%2Fcake-1.jpg&hash=d393ca4ad7b9bd225b44b4f4a2d4adc6c4378608)
and fairy cakes
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi18.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fb107%2Fjollyholly2005%2Fcake.jpg&hash=a9e81394e77bfa93cd95465d51ddead63a72d897)
Yes, but you?re not supposed to just make them and eat them? noooo:
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SHe eats leftovers the next day. Cake scarcely survives to the next day.
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I don't think they would have made it to Cyprus in a box.
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I don't think they would have made it to Cyprus in a box.
Well, we?ll never find out now will we? Banghead
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Why does that cake look like it is filled sage& onion stuffing?
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Why does that cake look like it is filled sage& onion stuffing?
It was a citrus poppyseed cake! I did make it for Easter. redface:
I did make the fairy buns this weekend though and rock cakes. I've tried sending cake to Spain. That didn't work out too well. sick2:
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi18.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fb107%2Fjollyholly2005%2Fcake.jpg&hash=a9e81394e77bfa93cd95465d51ddead63a72d897)
Even tried to camoflage them on the plate I see.
Thank heavens your crockery doesn't have brown and green swirly patterns. sick2:
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It's her new savoury cake. There is a a recipe on the board somewhere. It made the BF have convulsions. Very nice.
I make it for the MIL often! evil:
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi18.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fb107%2Fjollyholly2005%2Fcake.jpg&hash=a9e81394e77bfa93cd95465d51ddead63a72d897)
Even tried to camoflage them on the plate I see.
Thank heavens your crockery doesn't have brown and green swirly patterns. sick2:
That's my lovely vintage Midwinter plate you are talking about there! lol:
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi18.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fb107%2Fjollyholly2005%2Fcake.jpg&hash=a9e81394e77bfa93cd95465d51ddead63a72d897)
Even tried to camoflage them on the plate I see.
Thank heavens your crockery doesn't have brown and green swirly patterns. sick2:
That's my lovely vintage Midwinter plate you are talking about there! lol:
Of course, from their "Bleak at Lidl" collection.
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cussing:
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I don't think they would have made it to Cyprus in a box.
May I suggest you eat it then mail yourself to Cyprus?
I expect he'll settle for that.
Happiness all around. whistle:
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Talking of cakes ?n stuff there was an article on the radio today about a PMT cake ? I immediately thought of Wenchy for some reason? whistle:
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Talking of cakes ?n stuff there was an article on the radio today about a PMT cake ? I immediately thought of Wenchy for some reason? whistle:
As soon as I read PMT cake, I leapt to the same conclusion. redface: without finishing.
Are we trained or something? rubschin:
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Pavlovian response?
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Now that's deep Wench ~ very deep.
Have you noticed that whenever you announce that a meal is ready and on the table everyone in the house vanishes to go to the toilet? That is Pavlovian I am certain of it.
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Now that's deep Wench ~ very deep.
Have you noticed that whenever you announce that a meal is ready and on the table everyone in the house vanishes to go to the toilet? That is Pavlovian I am certain of it.
That could be just your cooking. ;)
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evil: evil: evil:
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Pavlovian response?
Do you make anything that is not cake, confectionery or sweet course? whistle:
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evil:
Of course I do!
Tonight is green thai curry with coconut rice.
A Thaitian response?
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Tonight is coconut rice pudding.
QED whistle:
Actually, I rather like Thai food, so any leftovers would do nicely for bar snacks.
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Mr Wench likes it too so there are unlikely to be left overs. eyes:
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Mr Wench likes it too so there are unlikely to be left overs. eyes:
So, you are cooking him a 'special' meal eh? eyes:
I take it you will be late for work tomorrow, and mostly standing up all day?
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eeek:
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Mr Wench likes it too so there are unlikely to be left overs. eyes:
So, you are cooking him a 'special' meal eh? eyes:
I take it you will be late for work tomorrow, and mostly standing up all day?
How very dare he Wench!!!
He's just jealous coz the best he gets is jellied eels and whelks!
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Very quiet today, but lots of guests online for some reason. Where is everyone? I am bored and need someone to play with cry:
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Working sweetie! sad24:
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Very quiet today, but lots of guests online for some reason. Where is everyone? I am bored and need someone to play with cry:
I was in the bath when you posted that.
I too have work to do. Deadline for the printers is 2pm today and I still have several pages to get set up and typed.
Once that is out of the way I have a Hospital appointment at 3pm and then normal service may be resumed.
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I have a hangover? noooo:
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I have a hangover? noooo:
PARDON?
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I have a hangover? noooo:
PARDON?
shocked003
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I had unexpected
gets guests who arrived on Wednesday (claiming to have e-mailed to say they were coming- noooo: not received) and left this lunch time. Now I cannot contact them and they were driving through an area which is now underwater. scared2: should I worry? rubschin:
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No
drumroll:
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Have you all gone to a funeral without me knowing?
Unless it was mine of course.
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Twas the Night Before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a creature was moving
Not even a mouse
Early I know but ........... nothing much else seems to be happening does it.
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Que?
I have been having a most strange morning!
I received an e mail via my website which contained an unusual but interesting business proposition. It was lengthy. It was signed by a man with an unusual name. I recognised the name. He is my ex-BIL who I have not seen in 20 years. I called him to discuss the idea. It was only after 20 minutes that I told him who I was. It got very odd after that!!
We are, however, in business!
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Having an outbreak of work here. Bit disconcerting, especially on a Monday.
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Me too. I am working hard to avoid it! evil:
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We have been shopping for mirrors... evil:
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Which one of you was invisible?
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Been very busy this morning as well.
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rubschin:
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Which one of you was invisible?
I was trying to be... noooo:
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"Do I look fat in this......?" etc??
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"Do I look fat in this......?" etc??
No, 'I quite like that one' - 'I think it's shite', etc. noooo:
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Mr Wench has said we don't need mirrors. eeek:
I passed out at work and was sent home. Hence the quiet from my end.
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Hence the quiet from my end
No farting then!
Seriously, why. Girl Flu or what?
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Mr Wench has said we don't need mirrors. eeek:
I passed out at work and was sent home. Hence the quiet from my end.
Passed out? Poor you...
happy100
Do you need a chest massage or anything like that? eyes:
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I passed out at work and was sent home.
happy100
Not feeling sick again this morning are we? eeek:
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Poor Wnchy. Unwell AND pregnant. noooo:
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Poor Wnchy. Unwell AND pregnant. noooo:
I didn't touch her! noooo:
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We believe you. point:
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We believe you. point:
evil:
Still, at least they can expand into the caravan if they need more space... triplets prolly. whistle:
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Does she have a milkman?
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Does she have a milkman?
Of course... whistle:
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Does she have a milkman?
Every day I heard.
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Banghead
Combination of low blood pressure and low blood sugar.
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Banghead
Combination of low blood pressure and low blood sugar.
Wispas then? whistle:
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That was my plan. redface:
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Combination of low blood pressure and low blood sugar.
If you had asked me for a list of likely Wench ailments, neither of those would have been on it.
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Combination of low blood pressure and low blood sugar.
If you had asked me for a list of likely Wench ailments, neither of those would have been on it.
No... she gives most of us high blood pressure... whistle:
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Combination of low blood pressure and low blood sugar.
If you had asked me for a list of likely Wench ailments, neither of those would have been on it.
No... she gives most of us high blood pressure... whistle:
In low places?
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eeek:
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Combination of low blood pressure and low blood sugar.
If you had asked me for a list of likely Wench ailments, neither of those would have been on it.
No... she gives most of us high blood pressure... whistle:
In low places?
[snigger] redface:
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Have you all got hangovers this morning?
Lovely day here. Just back from picking fresh toadstools mushrooms for Mrs DS (#3) to have for breakfast.
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In some ways I wish I did have a hangover. Then I would know that I would feel better later cry:
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In some ways I wish I did have a hangover. Then I would know that I would feel better later cry:
Black dog day?
More duvets?
Less donkeys?
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I still can't speak and ... actually have work to do! scared2:
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Phone calls to make?
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I still can't speak and ... actually have work to do! scared2:
That must be a shock to the system. eeek:
Been sick yet this morning?
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Banghead
Database cleaning. Banghead
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With a mop?
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Banghead
Database cleaning. Banghead
Indeed.
Those little bits of carrot get stuck everywhere, even in the Cardex.
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I am just off to a hospital appointment ~ I have another, at a different hospital, tomorrow.
These things take up most of one's day as they never run on time. evil:
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Take yer own reading material!¬
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Take yer own reading material!¬
Daily Torygraph and a biro. Then I sit among the locals and rattle off the crossword in double quick time.
Any word that fits the spaces will do 'cos THEY don't know the difference anyway. It's my revenge for their talking Welsh in front of me. eveilgrin:
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Take yer own reading material!¬
Daily Torygraph and a biro. Then I sit among the locals and rattle off the crossword in double quick time.
Any word that fits the spaces will do 'cos THEY don't know the difference anyway. It's my revenge for their talking Welsh in front of me. eveilgrin:
Combine that with asking them how many "t"s in "Botulism", then coughing in their direction.
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I always take two books, one magazine, mp3 player, knitting, 1 litre bottle of water, snacks, toilet paper. One never knows how long one might be stuck there for.
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Toilet paper?! eeek:
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After one visit that required a full bladder for a scan, I ran out of the room to go to the loo only to discover a lack of toilet paper. Banghead In fact they very rarely seem to have any. So, I take my own.
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Oh I see.
noooo:
Must have a massive backpack
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No, just a messanger bag. It really isn't that big. Sort of normal satchel sized.
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The word "normal" suffers from great abuse hereabouts. noooo:
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I survived the encounter. My little magic box is ticking away merrily and the battery is looking good for a few more years yet. Next check needed in three months ~ I did ask should I start queuing now but they told me not to be cheeky as they were only running 90 minutes late ~ which they seemed to think was good going. Considering they started at 9.30 and my appointment was for 11.10 I cannot imagine what they would think doing badly.
Oh and I also nipped into the Vampires Cave and they took some blood samples.
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At my hospital they schedule everyone for 9am. So that's me and 10 other women all sceduled to see one specialist at 9am. ::)
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At my hospital they schedule everyone for 9am. So that's me and 10 other women all sceduled to see one specialist at 9am. ::)
And let me guess ~ there were at least five fat nurses looking after the clinic, three talking whilst hugging patient files to their more than ample bosoms, one hovering round the consulting room door in case any of you ladies demanded a chaperon and one weighing everyone who came in and handing a foil pudding basin to those who had not brought a sample with them. The Consultant would have seen perhaps three of you whilst two junior doctors saw everyone else ~ and I bet neither of those two buggers was white or had an adequate command of the English language.
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At my hospital they schedule everyone for 9am. So that's me and 10 other women all sceduled to see one specialist at 9am. ::)
And let me guess ~ there were at least five fat nurses looking after the clinic, three talking whilst hugging patient files to their more than ample bosoms, one hovering round the consulting room door in case any of you ladies demanded a chaperon and one weighing everyone who came in and handing a foil pudding basin to those who had not brought a sample with them. The Consultant would have seen perhaps three of you whilst two junior doctors saw everyone else ~ and I bet neither of those two buggers was white or had an adequate command of the English language.
happ096
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I like the ample bosoms bit, but not the other bits
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At my hospital they schedule everyone for 9am. So that's me and 10 other women all sceduled to see one specialist at 9am. ::)
And let me guess ~ there were at least five fat nurses looking after the clinic, three talking whilst hugging patient files to their more than ample bosoms, one hovering round the consulting room door in case any of you ladies demanded a chaperon and one weighing everyone who came in and handing a foil pudding basin to those who had not brought a sample with them. The Consultant would have seen perhaps three of you whilst two junior doctors saw everyone else ~ and I bet neither of those two buggers was white or had an adequate command of the English language.
happ096
spot on happy088
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The one in charge of weighing yesterday had a shelf for an arse. I could have placed a cup and saucer on it as she passed ~ I dread to think what she must look like without clothes on. sick2:
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I dread to think what she must look like without clothes on.
I bet you gave it a try though?
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Not even I would eeek:
Honest her arse and hips had movement completely independent of the rest of her.
Speaking of which I have to go to Bangor Hospital now.
2pm appointment so I expect to be back about 6 !!!!
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Not even I would
I never thought I'd see the day. . . noooo:
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Me neither. confused:
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Not even I would eeek:
Honest her arse and hips had movement completely independent of the rest of her.
Speaking of which I have to go to Bangor Hospital now.
2pm appointment so I expect to be back about 6 !!!!
"Didn't we have a lovely time the day we went to Bangor" whistle:
On hunting for the lyrics I found this snippet:
Basra.
A horrible Day, we got shot on the way, and all for some barrells of oil you know.
On the way back, i was shot in the back, and we opened a bottle of morphine.
Dropping a few of our chemical bombs, as the kurds fell down
;)
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lol:
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I now have an ear worm... Banghead
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lol: lol: lol:
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lol: lol: lol:
Angry9:
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I'm back! Bangor is bleak and dreary in the rain today ~ not a place to go for a day out..... loverly or otherwise. evil:
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The weather here is vile and I have to be The Boy's taxi driver between his various engagements this evening cussing:
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After yesterday's frantic activity, everyone seems to be having a breather. rubschin:
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I have the older boy at home with The Cold today. Feeling a bit iffy myself come to think of it ~ prolly as a result of checking the bill/receipts that are building up as Christmas approaches. We will prevail however.
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As soon as that chatty bastard gets his sanding machine out I am off!
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I finish for Christmas in about an hour. Not back till Jan 3rd. Longest break I have had for a long while. But first we must be frog marched onto a coach at gunpoint, driven to a country pub and be force fed and boozed for a couple of hours. Still, there a good crowd here so no hardship.
I shall therefore be very quiet over the next couple of weeks though no doubt I shall pop in now and then to admire my profile. eyes:
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I finish for Christmas in about an hour. Not back till Jan 3rd. Longest break I have had for a long while. But first we must be frog marched onto a coach at gunpoint, driven to a country pub and be force fed and boozed for a couple of hours. Still, there a good crowd here so no hardship.
I shall therefore be very quiet over the next couple of weeks though no doubt I shall pop in now and then to admire my profile. eyes:
Have a nice break.
Do you want a PM if your profile changes unexpectedly?
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happy001
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I finish for Christmas in about an hour. Not back till Jan 3rd. Longest break I have had for a long while. But first we must be frog marched onto a coach at gunpoint, driven to a country pub and be force fed and boozed for a couple of hours. Still, there a good crowd here so no hardship.
I shall therefore be very quiet over the next couple of weeks though no doubt I shall pop in now and then to admire my profile. eyes:
Have a nice break.
Do you want a PM if your profile changes unexpectedly?
Yes please! happy088