The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: TG on May 28, 2008, 10:00:05 AM
-
I imagine thats the captains career forked. point:
I dont think they just shout at you a bit if you bend one of them things.
http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30200-1317368,00.html
-
It's about time they put windows on submarines:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FaV1mfHPi.jpg&hash=088fea0655ae015f6ff49139252c0f430331de57) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=aV1mfHPi)
-
Fetch the giant electric squid!
-
There'll be a court of enquiry and some poor sod will carry the rap. Usual outcome is that the Captain gets a bollocking and the Officer of the Watch is deducted a few years off his promotion prospects.
-
I wonder how much the excess is on one of those? sad24:
-
I wonder how much the excess is on one of those? sad24:
Squillions.
Is the Amazon thing working yet. Mrs TG is going to buy some books today for my birthday so we can do it via pub etc.
You know, line pockets etc. noooo:
-
I wonder how much the excess is on one of those? sad24:
Squillions.
Is the Amazon thing working yet. Mrs TG is going to buy some books today for my birthday so we can do it via pub etc.
You know, line pockets etc. noooo:
I haven't got the 'second email' yet... they are supposedly 'reviewing our website'...
I'll chase them today and see wassuup...
-
Fetch the giant electric squid!
I bet they all leapt sideways a couple of feet, the lights went red and jets of water and steam erupted from every orifice (of the sub)
-
Fetch the giant electric squid!
I bet they all leapt sideways a couple of feet, the lights went red and jets of water and steam erupted from every orifice (of the sub)
And then an engineer with a spanner turned a nut and it all stopped... ::)
-
Fetch the giant electric squid!
I bet they all leapt sideways a couple of feet, the lights went red and jets of water and steam erupted from every orifice (of the sub)
And then an engineer with a spanner turned a nut and it all stopped... ::)
That's right.
-
Fetch the giant electric squid!
I bet they all leapt sideways a couple of feet, the lights went red and jets of water and steam erupted from every orifice (of the sub)
And then an engineer with a spanner turned a nut and it all stopped... ::)
That's right.
And they then all stand in silence with worried looks on their faces listening to the ‘ping’ of the Asdec… prolly. scared2:
-
Fetch the giant electric squid!
I bet they all leapt sideways a couple of feet, the lights went red and jets of water and steam erupted from every orifice (of the sub)
And then an engineer with a spanner turned a nut and it all stopped... ::)
That's right.
And they then all stand in silence with worried looks on their faces listening to the ‘ping’ of the Asdec… prolly. scared2:
And Richard Attenborough tries to claw his way out the hatch.
-
Fetch the giant electric squid!
I bet they all leapt sideways a couple of feet, the lights went red and jets of water and steam erupted from every orifice (of the sub)
And then an engineer with a spanner turned a nut and it all stopped... ::)
That's right.
And they then all stand in silence with worried looks on their faces listening to the ‘ping’ of the Asdec… prolly. scared2:
Then all look up and traverse the ceiling with their eyes to the sound effect of a lorry on cobblestones.
-
Fetch the giant electric squid!
I bet they all leapt sideways a couple of feet, the lights went red and jets of water and steam erupted from every orifice (of the sub)
And then an engineer with a spanner turned a nut and it all stopped... ::)
That's right.
And they then all stand in silence with worried looks on their faces listening to the ‘ping’ of the Asdec… prolly. scared2:
Then all look up and traverse the ceiling with their eyes to the sound effect of a lorry on cobblestones.
That will be the depth charge which then slides noisely down the side of the sub.
-
Fetch the giant electric squid!
I bet they all leapt sideways a couple of feet, the lights went red and jets of water and steam erupted from every orifice (of the sub)
And then an engineer with a spanner turned a nut and it all stopped... ::)
That's right.
And they then all stand in silence with worried looks on their faces listening to the ‘ping’ of the Asdec… prolly. scared2:
Then all look up and traverse the ceiling with their eyes to the sound effect of a lorry on cobblestones.
That will be the depth charge which then slides noisely down the side of the sub.
but doesn't explode! eeek:
-
The chief engineer will be a Scot and some arse will offer the officers cocoa.
-
They lose control of the depth… the structure begins to creak and groan as everybody stares at the depth gage…
-
With luck they may even have a depth guage to gaze at.
-
With luck they may even have a depth guage to gaze at.
Um, yes... redface:
-
With luck they may even have a depth guage to gaze at.
or even a depth gauge ;)
-
With luck they may even have a depth guage to gaze at.
or even a depth gauge ;)
lol:
Anyway, the tension of the moment has been lost now... cry:
-
With luck they may even have a depth guage to gaze at.
or even a depth gauge ;)
lol:
Anyway, the tension of the moment has been lost now... cry:
Indeed, I was on the edge of my seat as well. noooo:
-
True, and we didn't even get to to release some oil along with firing debris and the handy dead body out of the torpedo tube to fool the attackers into thinking they'd sunk us.
-
And all because you can't spot irony when it hits you amidships. ::)
-
Of course Snoopy, of course. < condescending pat on head>
-
You are patting the end that shits evil:
-
Can I help it if you talk it ;)
-
Can I help it if you talk it ;)
drumroll:
-
You are patting the end that shits evil:
I thought that was both ends? ;)
Anyway, back on topic(ish), what about the jolly tar pushing the bulkhead door shut against 20,000,000 tonnes of water and leaving the brave Welsh chap holding the stopcock closed with a small spanner, trapped inside?
-
You're trapped in submarine and you have to escape.
(http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://www.play-to-play.com/files/submachine.gif&imgrefurl=http://www.play-to-play.com/game-228.html&h=250&w=400&sz=42&hl=en&start=39&um=1&tbnid=23xdp11yRpucMM:&tbnh=78&tbnw=124&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dtrapped%2Bin%2Ba%2Bsubmarine%26start%3D20%26ndsp%3D20%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN)(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.play-to-play.com%2Ffiles%2Fsubmachine.gif&hash=e02fad61a56cc660724f650fd0ace8858e8f3484)
-
Ohhhh point and click! I love those!
-
Ohhhh point and click!
You have Arthritis as well?
-
Aha! Staff shortages!
"In the week that it emerged that a British submarine had been forced to surface after colliding with a rock outcrop under the Red Sea, the Navy insists the shortages have not reached a level where they compromise operational safety." rubschin:
http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30100-1317557,00.html
-
Aha! Staff shortages!
"In the week that it emerged that a British submarine had been forced to surface after colliding with a rock outcrop under the Red Sea, the Navy insists the shortages have not reached a level where they compromise operational safety." rubschin:
http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30100-1317557,00.html
They prolly fired them out of the 'tubes with bundles of rags 'n stuff... whistle:
-
What about making up the shortfall with wimmin then? Like the Aussies and the norwegens do. eyes:
-
What about making up the shortfall with wimmin then? Like the Aussies and the norwegens do. eyes:
rubschin:
"look at the muck in here, when did you last clean that reactor..." that sort of thing?
-
"Feed the fucking kitten before you go on duty"
-
"Feed the fucking kitten before you go on duty"
lol: lol: lol:
-
According to Wiki the norwegan navy have 6 sumbarines. WTF do they need them for? noooo:
-
According to Wiki the norwegan navy have 6 sumbarines. WTF do they need them for? noooo:
shrugs:
-
According to Wiki the norwegan navy have 6 sumbarines. WTF do they need them for? noooo:
shrugs:
The Aussies also have six. Still, they have lots of refugee rowing boats to torpedo I suppose. whistle:
-
We appear to have 13, including 4 nuclear missile subs. Which also begs the question WTF do we need them for?
-
What would we do with all those sailors if we didn't have the ships then eh? EH?
-
What would we do with all those sailors if we didn't have the ships then eh? EH?
Rent 'em out to the Norwegians.
-
What would we do with all those sailors if we didn't have the ships then eh? EH?
Rent 'em out to the Norwegians.
rubschin:
-
What would we do with all those sailors if we didn't have the ships then eh? EH?
Rent 'em out to the Norwegians.
rubschin:
He has a point you know.
We could start an EU seamen mountain.
-
eeek:
-
An' flog 'em to the Swiss.
-
Flog the bugger!
http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30100-1317908,00.html
-
Flog the bugger!
http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30100-1317908,00.html
Keel haul him... cussing:
-
Fcuking
kitt cat 'o' nine tails is to good for 'im. cussing:
-
Fcuking kitt cat 'o' nine tails is to good for 'im. cussing:
Aye, Aye... dive the boat then keel haul him... whistle:
-
Then burn the bloody Sun's offices to the ground. The Navy are dealing with it so why try to make out that this incident, which happened in dock, is in any way connected with the grounding whilst on patrol?
Fvcking journalists ought to be shot and their editor's head placed on a spike at the Tower as a lesson to all.
Revealing things like this only gives ammunition to our enemies. That is treason! cussing:
-
The bonio chomping one is enraged. What to do. rubschin: ;D
-
The bonio chomping one is enraged. What to do. rubschin: ;D
Give me a cat to chase or better yet a kitten to drown.
-
The bonio chomping one is enraged. What to do. rubschin: ;D
Give me a cat to chase or better yet a kitten to drown.
....give me a couple of weeks. ;)
-
Then burn the bloody Sun's offices to the ground. The Navy are dealing with it so why try to make out that this incident, which happened in dock, is in any way connected with the grounding whilst on patrol?
Fvcking journalists ought to be shot and their editor's head placed on a spike at the Tower as a lesson to all.
Revealing things like this only gives ammunition to our enemies. That is treason! cussing:
Treason you say! He should be hung, drawn and quartered... although the quartering part does seem a little excessive... noooo:
-
Then burn the bloody Sun's offices to the ground. The Navy are dealing with it so why try to make out that this incident, which happened in dock, is in any way connected with the grounding whilst on patrol?
Fvcking journalists ought to be shot and their editor's head placed on a spike at the Tower as a lesson to all.
Revealing things like this only gives ammunition to our enemies. That is treason! cussing:
Treason you say! He should be hung, drawn and quartered... although the quartering part does seem a little excessive... noooo:
I believe "Hanged, drawn and quartered" is the correct English... whistle:
-
However you spell it I bet it stung a bit.
-
However you spell it I bet it stung a bit.
What he said...
-
However you spell it I bet it stung a bit.
I always thought being hung well was a good thing?
-
However you spell it I bet it stung a bit.
I always thought being hung well was a good thing?
You’re confused – that’s well hung you’re thinking of… noooo:
-
However you spell it I bet it stung a bit.
I always thought being hung well was a good thing?
You’re confused – that’s well hung you’re thinking of… noooo:
I take it there is some difference?
-
However you spell it I bet it stung a bit.
I always thought being hung well was a good thing?
You’re confused – that’s well hung you’re thinking of… noooo:
I take it there is some difference?
Perhaps we could try an experiement? point:
-
Would it be as painful as a "purple nurple" as administered by Mrs TMR (to be) when I make a slightly derogatory remark? rubschin:
-
Would it be as painful as a "purple nurple" as administered by Mrs TMR (to be) when I make a slightly derogatory remark? rubschin:
My mind is still boggling at that one. eeek:
-
Well hung purple nurples?
-
Would it be as painful as a "purple nurple" as administered by Mrs TMR (to be) when I make a slightly derogatory remark? rubschin:
My mind is still boggling at that one. eeek:
Simple and very effective - her talons spring forth, grab my left nipple which is then yanked in a clockwise manner in an extremely violent manner. The resultant pain is quite staggering. Said nipple later takes on a violent violet hue; thus "purple nurple".
Usually as a result of the "compared to what?" retort vis a vis jeans/trousers...
-
Nearly as bad as a punch in the nadgers whilst shopping. surrender:
-
Well hung purple nurples?
You, young lady, are supposed to be maintaining a high standard in control of sly posts relating to chest adornments. point:
Snoopy has appointed you head of the teat police and we expect great things of you.
-
A punch in the 'nads?
Are you very tall, or is Mrs TG very short?
-
A punch in the 'nads?
Are you very tall, or is Mrs TG very short?
Yes.
-
A punch in the 'nads?
Are you very tall, or is Mrs TG very short?
Yes.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FaV29lbvS.jpg&hash=61e95057386755d18e27063b4619ea5aa28b59df) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=aV29lbvS)
-
A punch in the 'nads?
Are you very tall, or is Mrs TG very short?
Yes.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FaV29lbvS.jpg&hash=61e95057386755d18e27063b4619ea5aa28b59df) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=aV29lbvS)
Lose Barker and your about there. eeek:
-
Got a bleedin' power cut again. Young's by candlight, how sweet!
-
A punch in the 'nads?
Are you very tall, or is Mrs TG very short?
Fandabbydozy
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPq26kTWS.jpg&hash=12466001ce11d78fbab46f5f9d30c4182023ee3c) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=Pq26kTWS)
Is having "The Krankies" in your internet history worse than having porn in your internet history? rubschin:
-
A punch in the 'nads?
Are you very tall, or is Mrs TG very short?
Fandabbydozy
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPq26kTWS.jpg&hash=12466001ce11d78fbab46f5f9d30c4182023ee3c) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=Pq26kTWS)
Is having "The Krankies" in your internet history worse than having porn in your internet history? rubschin:
Much much worse. Even Gary Glitter didn't have that found by PC world. noooo:
A punch in the 'nads?
Are you very tall, or is Mrs TG very short?
Yes.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FaV29lbvS.jpg&hash=61e95057386755d18e27063b4619ea5aa28b59df) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=aV29lbvS)
Lose Barker and your about there. eeek:
Is Mrs TG really 2 feet taller than you?
Vanessa Redgrave eat your commie heart out.
-
A punch in the 'nads?
Are you very tall, or is Mrs TG very short?
Fandabbydozy
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPq26kTWS.jpg&hash=12466001ce11d78fbab46f5f9d30c4182023ee3c) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=Pq26kTWS)
Is having "The Krankies" in your internet history worse than having porn in your internet history? rubschin:
Much much worse. Even Gary Glitter didn't have that found by PC world. noooo:
A punch in the 'nads?
Are you very tall, or is Mrs TG very short?
Yes.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FaV29lbvS.jpg&hash=61e95057386755d18e27063b4619ea5aa28b59df) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=aV29lbvS)
Lose Barker and your about there. eeek:
Is Mrs TG really 2 feet taller than you?
Vanessa Redgrave eat your commie heart out.
only about a foot shorter than TG! and he calls me a dwarf!