The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on March 15, 2016, 12:43:29 PM
-
Many years ago I went to work in Mexico and applied here for the necessary visa. The document I was given required further processing on arrival so I went to the correct office in Mexico City. I was told I needed a photograph of myself. I was not told that it had to conform to very specific guidelines and be accompanied by a description of myself in SPanish. To cut a very long story short, I ended up with 54 photos of me of which only one was deemed to be correct and I also had to rewrite my self description 8 times until I was correctly using Spanish words for stuff like tall, wide, deep and so on. (Don't ask)
My visa form had a reference number but the actual visa had a different reference number so when the day came to collect my residence visa I had to search through over 4000 other entries before I found mine noooo:
At some point I went over to Guatamala (a mistake as I didn't realised they were having a civil war. I thought all the shooting was evidence of hunting and spent three weeks there blithely unaware of what was going on noooo:)
WHen the time came to re enter Mexico I was denied entry and told I had to get a new visa form from the British Consul in Huehuetenango ( a dead and alive border town where I terrified the natives (they were all tiny Mayan Indians and I was knocking around with a Texan bodybuilder), had my fortune told by a chaffinch and got locked in a bath of volcanic mud).
The document was free but the COnsul's PA told me that it would cost me a dollar. Being English I refused to pay this on principle and demanded to see the consul (who seemed to have some links with the local drugs business).
After a long wait and a long protest from me he said, "Will you pay the dollar or not?" I declined. He opened a desk drawer and produced a revolver eeek: "Are you sure?" he asked.
I paid
-
Thumbs:
-
I also recall the time (how we laughed) in the Negev desert when I startled an Israeli conscript causing his machine gun to go off Shocked:
I wet myself redface:
-
Thumbs:
Thumbs: Thumbs:
-
I can understand why Miss I is thinking oof walking back from Rome :thumbsup:
-
Spank2:
-
What is the Spanish for 'Ginger' then...? Popcorn:
-
Arsehole Spank2:
-
How strange, Google Translate says it is jengibre... rubschin:
-
Up yours, baldy
-
Up yours, baldy
Or Encima el suyo , calvo as we say in Mexico! lol:
-
Or taking her up the Erewash as we say here whistle:
No sweetcorn
-
Or taking her up the Erewash as we say here whistle:
No sweetcorn
sick2: sick2: sick2:
-
WHen the time came to re enter Mexico I was denied entry and told I had to get a new visa form from the British Consul in Huehuetenango ( a dead and alive border town where I terrified the natives (they were all tiny Mayan Indians and I was knocking around with a Texan bodybuilder), had my fortune told by a chaffinch and got locked in a bath of volcanic mud).
So the natives either thought you were recruiting for a Village People tribute act or were busy shouting "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrghh! Gringo gingero!!!! Vete!!!" rubschin: