The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on November 12, 2014, 04:08:29 PM

Title: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 12, 2014, 04:08:29 PM
So the phone rings

"Ah, Mr Nick!! Are you available? We have a client who needs your any expert skills asap cos they are in a bit of a pickle, like, and are you interested?"

Me: "Go on""

"Dead urgent, three days a week indefinitely and  £600 a day paid to your company so you escape tax, like. Can you start Monday"?

Me:   rubschin: rubschin: Where?

"Scunthorpe"  evil: evil:


I shall now dust off the klaxon for all your many Scunthorpe related witticisms  ::)

Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: apc2010 on November 12, 2014, 04:47:34 PM
So the phone rings

"Ah, Mr Nick!! Are you available? We have a client who needs your any expert skills asap cos they are in a bit of a pickle, like, and are you interested?"

Me: "Go on""

"Dead urgent, three days a week indefinitely and  £600 a day paid to your company so you escape tax, like. Can you start Monday"?

Me:   rubschin: rubschin: Where?

"Scunthorpe"  evil: evil:


I shall now dust off the klaxon for all your many Scunthorpe related witticisms  ::)

Too many........ noooo:   But as BM is going to Thorpe ..there maybe something there...... rubschin:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 12, 2014, 05:14:39 PM
Some sort of prefix, perhaps  rubschin:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Barman on November 12, 2014, 05:51:53 PM
::)
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: boogs on November 12, 2014, 07:57:03 PM
Scunthorpe  shutup:  Spent a week there one day  ::)

Think positive tho not too far to travel ..... eeek:

There may be lots of desperate single wimmin there  angel1
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Barman on November 13, 2014, 07:08:19 AM
Scunthorpe  shutup:  Spent a week there one day  ::)

Think positive tho not too far to travel ..... eeek:

There may be lots of desperate single wimmin there  angel1

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 14, 2014, 02:19:08 PM
So the money laundering shite begins  ::)

Company certificate
PI insurance
Utility bills
Passport scan
Driving licence scan
DBS cert
Sperm sample
etc.
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Steve on November 14, 2014, 06:01:19 PM
How many miles/hours a day commuting?  I had to look up where Scunthorpe was - I thought it was near Crewe  redface:

Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 14, 2014, 06:04:02 PM
140 mile round trip, so 3 days a week = 2 nights a week in an hotel + eating out (expenses)  rubschin:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Steve on November 14, 2014, 06:13:27 PM
140 mile round trip, so 3 days a week = 2 nights a week in an hotel + eating out (expenses)  rubschin:
I daren't ask what Scunthorpe hotels are like

I used to do a 140 miles a day round trip 4 days out of 5, got quite used to it in the end.  British radio is the best.
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: boogs on November 15, 2014, 09:19:21 AM
I did 140 miles a day 5 days a week as Steve says it is ok if you keep occupied Radio 4 and talking books with some Radio 2 and Smooth helped  Thumbs:

I have to say I didn't think it was that far  eeek:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Barman on November 15, 2014, 09:37:25 AM
I did 140 miles a day 5 days a week as Steve says it is ok if you keep occupied Radio 4 and talking books with some Radio 2 and Smooth helped  Thumbs:

I have to say I didn't think it was that far  eeek:

You and Steve didn't drive an owld Sierra tho did you....?  noooo:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 15, 2014, 09:46:16 AM
 horn: horn:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Steve on November 15, 2014, 10:11:06 AM
I did 140 miles a day 5 days a week as Steve says it is ok if you keep occupied Radio 4 and talking books with some Radio 2 and Smooth helped  Thumbs:

I have to say I didn't think it was that far  eeek:

You and Steve didn't drive an owld Sierra tho did you....?  noooo:
Nope and the magnificent turbo Mazda never broke down once in 70,000 miles  cloud9:   
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: boogs on November 16, 2014, 02:29:02 PM
I did 140 miles a day 5 days a week as Steve says it is ok if you keep occupied Radio 4 and talking books with some Radio 2 and Smooth helped  Thumbs:

I have to say I didn't think it was that far  eeek:

You and Steve didn't drive an owld Sierra tho did you....?  noooo:

 noooo: noooo:  My Skoda  Porshe   redface:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 16, 2014, 02:55:10 PM
I am getting paid expenses to stay at the finest hotel in Scunthorpe  cloud9:  It is call the Travel Lodge  evil:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: apc2010 on November 16, 2014, 02:56:01 PM
I am getting paid expenses to stay at the finest hotel in Scunthorpe  cloud9:  It is call the Travel Lodge  evil:

 noooo:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: boogs on November 16, 2014, 04:45:17 PM
I am getting paid expenses to stay at the finest hotel in Scunthorpe  cloud9:  It is call the Travel Lodge  evil:

 noooo:

 lol: lol: lol:  happy100
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 16, 2014, 04:50:06 PM
Also to eat out in the evenings  :thumbsup:

So that is kebabs then  noooo: noooo:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: apc2010 on November 16, 2014, 07:15:01 PM
Also to eat out in the evenings  :thumbsup:

So that is kebabs then  noooo: noooo:

Extra chilli sauce........ Thumbs:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Steve on November 16, 2014, 07:17:10 PM
I am getting paid expenses to stay at the finest hotel in Scunthorpe  cloud9:  It is call the Travel Lodge  evil:
Also to eat out in the evenings  :thumbsup:

So that is kebabs then  noooo: noooo:
lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 17, 2014, 09:47:01 AM
Start next (not this) Monday after they have checked my criminal record  scared2: scared2:

Brummagem trip on Wednesday now  ::)
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Uncle Mort on November 17, 2014, 11:22:41 AM
I take it that if you haven't got a criminal record you can't work in Scunthorpe.
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Barman on November 17, 2014, 11:23:37 AM
I take it that if you haven't got a criminal record you can't work in Scunthorpe.

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 17, 2014, 11:31:37 AM
I take it that if you haven't got a criminal record you can't work in Scunthorpe.
drumroll: drumroll:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Steve on November 17, 2014, 11:40:50 AM
I take it that if you haven't got a criminal record you can't work in Scunthorpe.

 lol: lol: lol:
lol: lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Steve on November 23, 2014, 08:36:52 PM
Start next (not this) Monday after they have checked my criminal record  scared2: scared2:
 . . .
Hope it goes well tomorra Nick
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: apc2010 on November 24, 2014, 04:47:47 AM
Start next (not this) Monday after they have checked my criminal record  scared2: scared2:
 . . .
Hope it goes well tomorra Nick


 Thumbs:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 24, 2014, 05:33:19 AM
 surrender: surrender: surrender:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: apc2010 on November 24, 2014, 02:07:41 PM
surrender: surrender: surrender:

Sacked......... rubschin:
Title: Re: Mr Nick's all new another new job thread
Post by: Nick on November 24, 2014, 06:38:34 PM
 NickSick