The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Just One More on November 03, 2013, 07:47:02 AM

Title: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Just One More on November 03, 2013, 07:47:02 AM
All nice and ready like  Popcorn:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 07:48:58 AM
 scared2:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 07:52:04 AM
scared2:

 point:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 07:53:55 AM
For some reason they only had front row seats left. The wumman at the box office warned me twice  eeek:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 08:00:45 AM
For some reason they only had front row seats left. The wumman at the box office warned me twice  eeek:

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Just One More on November 03, 2013, 08:10:56 AM
Top Tip - Don't go to the toilet before leaving home. Leave it until he's a few minutes into his performance, then go  whistle:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 08:12:23 AM
 :thumbsup:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 09:23:14 AM
Top Tip - Don't go to the toilet before leaving home. Leave it until he's a few minutes into his performance, then go  whistle:

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Landlady on November 03, 2013, 09:41:44 AM
Top Tip - Don't go to the toilet before leaving home. Leave it until he's a few minutes into his performance, then go  whistle:

Top Tip - Don't use too much talc otherwise you might be sending up huge dust clouds when you applaud  whistle:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Steve on November 03, 2013, 11:09:06 AM
 lol: lol: lol: ^
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 04:07:31 PM
It is surprisingly tricky to select clothing which is not open to ridicule  rubschin:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 04:09:21 PM
It is surprisingly tricky to select clothing which is not open to ridicule  rubschin:

Don't worry about it.... it might not be as bad as you think.... happy100

The entire front row might be full of gingers!  happy001
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: apc2010 on November 03, 2013, 04:15:34 PM
It is surprisingly tricky to select clothing which is not open to ridicule  rubschin:

Don't worry about it.... it might not be as bad as you think.... happy100

The entire front row might be full of gingers!  happy001

Went banana caberet in Balham (comedy club) with a black guy , an Indian guy , a german , etc we looked like United nations or a benneton ad ....they said .there is space at the front .....I said fuck off I'm not giving them their act..... noooo:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 04:16:34 PM
It is surprisingly tricky to select clothing which is not open to ridicule  rubschin:

Don't worry about it.... it might not be as bad as you think.... happy100

The entire front row might be full of gingers!  happy001

Went banana caberet in Balham (comedy club) with a black guy , an Indian guy , a german , etc we looked like United nations or a benneton ad ....they said .there is space at the front .....I said fuck off I'm not giving them their act..... noooo:

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: apc2010 on November 03, 2013, 04:21:50 PM
It is surprisingly tricky to select clothing which is not open to ridicule  rubschin:

Don't worry about it.... it might not be as bad as you think.... happy100

The entire front row might be full of gingers!  happy001

Went banana caberet in Balham (comedy club) with a black guy , an Indian guy , a german , etc we looked like United nations or a benneton ad ....they said .there is space at the front .....I said fuck off I'm not giving them their act..... noooo:

 lol: lol: lol:

It was that long ago Alan Davies..(QI etc) was on the bill ..nobody knew who he was .....and all the acts picked on the front row........sorry Nick....
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 04:56:33 PM
Secretary by Al Murray The Pub Landlord - Live at the Apollo Hamersmith (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tPTeYuBT_s#)

 scared2:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 06:11:29 PM
Secretary by Al Murray The Pub Landlord - Live at the Apollo Hamersmith (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tPTeYuBT_s#)

 scared2:

"What do you do for a living Nick?"... "I'm a secretary"...

 point:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: apc2010 on November 03, 2013, 06:21:52 PM
I hope they film it....... Thumbs:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Baldy on November 03, 2013, 06:47:22 PM
You are fooked Ginje.  noooo: noooo:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 07:22:45 PM
You are fooked Ginje.  noooo: noooo:

Especially if he wear those deck shoes...  noooo:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Baldy on November 03, 2013, 07:27:57 PM
You are fooked Ginje.  noooo: noooo:

Especially if he wear those deck shoes...  noooo:

I can see a humongous internet viral thingy coming up.  Thumbs:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 07:29:14 PM
You are fooked Ginje.  noooo: noooo:

Especially if he wear those deck shoes...  noooo:

I can see a humongous internet viral thingy coming up.  Thumbs:

He'd better be wearing that Virtual Pub tee-shirt I sent him!  cussing:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Baldy on November 03, 2013, 07:30:30 PM
You are fooked Ginje.  noooo: noooo:

Especially if he wear those deck shoes...  noooo:

I can see a humongous internet viral thingy coming up.  Thumbs:

He'd better be wearing that Virtual Pub tee-shirt I sent him!  cussing:

Is he on kermission like?  rubschin:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 07:34:09 PM
You are fooked Ginje.  noooo: noooo:

Especially if he wear those deck shoes...  noooo:

I can see a humongous internet viral thingy coming up.  Thumbs:

He'd better be wearing that Virtual Pub tee-shirt I sent him!  cussing:

Is he on kermission like?  rubschin:

Did he sign a contract....?  whistle:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Baldy on November 03, 2013, 07:36:32 PM
You are fooked Ginje.  noooo: noooo:

Especially if he wear those deck shoes...  noooo:

I can see a humongous internet viral thingy coming up.  Thumbs:

He'd better be wearing that Virtual Pub tee-shirt I sent him!  cussing:

Is he on kermission like?  rubschin:

Did he sign a contract....?  whistle:

Fooked anally once again.  lol: lol:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 03, 2013, 07:37:13 PM
You are fooked Ginje.  noooo: noooo:

Especially if he wear those deck shoes...  noooo:

I can see a humongous internet viral thingy coming up.  Thumbs:

He'd better be wearing that Virtual Pub tee-shirt I sent him!  cussing:

Is he on kermission like?  rubschin:

Did he sign a contract....?  whistle:

Fooked anally once again.  lol: lol:

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Baldy on November 03, 2013, 10:02:05 PM
How did you get on ginje?  Popcorn:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 10:02:17 PM
I am back like  :thumbsup:

Made the mistake of wearing that roll neck sweater. He had me tagged as a U boat commander from the off and insisted on speaking to me in German all evening  evil:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Baldy on November 03, 2013, 10:05:27 PM
I am back like  :thumbsup:

Made the mistake of wearing that roll neck sweater. He had me tagged as a U boat commander from the off and insisted on speaking to me in German all evening  evil:

 point: point: point: point: point:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: apc2010 on November 03, 2013, 10:25:25 PM
I am back like  :thumbsup:

Made the mistake of wearing that roll neck sweater. He had me tagged as a U boat commander from the off and insisted on speaking to me in German all evening  evil:

 ;D ;D   did have those boots on....... rubschin:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 10:28:16 PM
Doc Martin's. He did a full half hour on vajazzles and had wimmin shouting out their favourite names for their lady parts. It was amazing  eeek:

Poor chap next to me got the brunt of everything for two hours. His GF nearly died laughing  noooo:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Baldy on November 03, 2013, 10:33:23 PM
Doc Martin's. He did a full half hour on vajazzles and had wimmin shouting out their favourite names for their lady parts. It was amazing  eeek:

Poor chap next to me got the brunt of everything for two hours. His GF nearly died laughing  noooo:

Come back to Cyprus and we will go and see Apey do stand up.....you will enjoy it. Thumbs:   eveilgrin:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: apc2010 on November 03, 2013, 10:39:49 PM
Doc Martin's. He did a full half hour on vajazzles and had wimmin shouting out their favourite names for their lady parts. It was amazing  eeek:

Poor chap next to me got the brunt of everything for two hours. His GF nearly died laughing  noooo:

I meant das boot...... ::)
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 10:42:01 PM
Some Grade A porridge wog bashing too!  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: boogs on November 03, 2013, 10:43:14 PM
Some Grade A porridge wog bashing too!  :thumbsup:

 evil:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 10:44:07 PM
One bloke on the front row declared himself to be a financial adviser. PL asked him about the Euro. FA said we should never have joined it


 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: boogs on November 03, 2013, 10:45:57 PM
One bloke on the front row declared himself to be a financial adviser. PL asked him about the Euro. FA said we should never have joined it


 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001

What a  Wankah: (the FA BTW) happy001 happy001
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Just One More on November 03, 2013, 10:51:38 PM
I am back like  :thumbsup:

Made the mistake of wearing that roll neck sweater. He had me tagged as a U boat commander from the off and insisted on speaking to me in German all evening  evil:

"Vot is your name"

"Don't tell him Nick"
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Baldy on November 03, 2013, 10:56:10 PM
I am back like  :thumbsup:

Made the mistake of wearing that roll neck sweater. He had me tagged as a U boat commander from the off and insisted on speaking to me in German all evening  evil:

"Vot is your name"

"Don't tell him Nick"

 lol: lol:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Steve on November 03, 2013, 11:19:32 PM
I am back like  :thumbsup:

Made the mistake of wearing that roll neck sweater. He had me tagged as a U boat commander from the off and insisted on speaking to me in German all evening  evil:

"Vot is your name"

"Don't tell him Nick"

 lol: lol:
happy002
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 11:24:57 PM
 evil:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Steve on November 03, 2013, 11:29:44 PM
So seriously, was he good?
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 11:31:49 PM
My sides are still aching  :thumbsup:

He had his script but he was brill at dealing with the audience. Highly recommended. Fabulous ad libs.
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Steve on November 03, 2013, 11:33:54 PM
My sides are still aching  :thumbsup:

He had his script but he was brill at dealing with the audience. Highly recommended. Fabulous ad libs.
:thumbsup:

ta
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 11:39:31 PM
If he is near you go and see him. A real treat for me tonight, despite the U boat stuff  evil:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: boogs on November 03, 2013, 11:41:24 PM
If he is near you go and see him. A real treat for me tonight, despite the U boat stuff  evil:

 happy100   lol: lol:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 03, 2013, 11:42:50 PM
He said some bad things about Derby. And trams  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: boogs on November 03, 2013, 11:43:28 PM
He said some bad things about Derby. And trams  eveilgrin:

 evil:
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 04, 2013, 05:57:41 AM
Doc Martin's. He did a full half hour on vajazzles and had wimmin shouting out their favourite names for their lady parts. It was amazing  eeek:

Poor chap next to me got the brunt of everything for two hours. His GF nearly died laughing  noooo:

I meant das boot...... ::)

I got it Apey...  Thumbs:

Sounds like a great night Nick....  ;D
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on November 04, 2013, 08:21:24 AM
I am back like  :thumbsup:

Made the mistake of wearing that roll neck sweater. He had me tagged as a U boat commander from the off and insisted on speaking to me in German all evening  evil:

Is that your periscope or are you pleased to see us?
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Nick on November 04, 2013, 08:45:05 AM
Al on wimmin

Feminism. I am all in favour of it. I think it's fantastic that you ladies had an idea at last! OK, it was all about you but it's a start.

Back in the 60s you all threatened to burn your bras unless men did the washing up. Result? Loads of saggy tits and some bloke had to invent the dishwasher.

We love you ladies just the way you are. You don't need a vajazzle, fake tan, make up. You ladies are bootiful.......
We don't mind if you get some work done on yer tits obviously. Have to look after the shop window eh?
Title: Re: What's yer name fella... Nick.. Come up onto the stage Nick
Post by: Barman on November 04, 2013, 08:48:34 AM
Al on wimmin

Feminism. I am all in favour of it. I think it's fantastic that you ladies had an idea at last! OK, it was all about you but it's a start.

Back in the 60s you all threatened to burn your bras unless men did the washing up. Result? Loads of saggy tits and some bloke had to invent the dishwasher.

We love you ladies just the way you are. You don't need a vajazzle, fake tan, make up. You ladies are bootiful.......
We don't mind if you get some work done on yer tits obviously. Have to look after the shop window eh?

 lol: lol: lol: