The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on August 15, 2007, 11:12:17 AM

Title: A large bang
Post by: Nick on August 15, 2007, 11:12:17 AM
I just heard a tremendous noise outside. Went to have a peek and it was a car crash.

Lady in Nissan turning right into the lane by our house mashed by yoof in Vauxhall chavmobile who was TRYING TO OVERTAKE HER as she turned right on a narrow wet road in the rain.

I prised her door open (no one hurt) and advised them to exchange details (she was in shock I think). As it is pissing it down I invited them both into the kitchen to do the business. I think her car is a write off.

I asked him old he was. I think you know the answer already.














If you thought 17 you would be right.

He was grumbling that he only had 3rd party insurance and his car was crumpled. I only looked at him. "How much is fully comp insurance then on your W reg car?"

"A lot."

I wonder why. point:

Details exchanged he drove off, at high speed, and hit a lamp post! noooo:

I suspect his steering rack may be a bit bent. Well it certainly is now evil:
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: GROWLER on August 15, 2007, 11:35:31 AM
If you thought 17 you would be right.

He was grumbling that he only had 3rd party insurance and his car was crumpled. I only looked at him. "How much is fully comp insurance then on your W reg car?"



Really?
Call me a cynical old bastard if you like, but I'd bet my life he hasn't got any insurance at all
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Nick on August 15, 2007, 12:11:10 PM
Not my prob! I have my own. Like where is Wenchy?
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Berek on August 15, 2007, 03:22:23 PM
.
 As it is pissing it down I invited them both into the kitchen to do the business.


 eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek:

did you tell the Macca had been in the kitchen ?
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Snoopy on August 15, 2007, 03:31:48 PM
If you thought 17 you would be right.

He was grumbling that he only had 3rd party insurance and his car was crumpled. I only looked at him. "How much is fully comp insurance then on your W reg car?"



Really?
Call me a cynical old bastard if you like, but I'd bet my life he hasn't got any insurance at all

You're a cynical old bastard and I expect you're right. ;)
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Barman on August 16, 2007, 07:38:58 AM
.
 As it is pissing it down I invited them both into the kitchen to do the business.


 eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek:

did you tell the Macca had been in the kitchen ?
Nooooo, if that gets out they?ll be queuing up outside to have accidents?   noooo:
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Miss Demeanour on August 16, 2007, 09:02:58 AM
Nick - why does so much happen to you, around you or behind you eyes:

Have you been through regression to find out what in your past lives you have done that merits the misfortune you expereince in this one  lol:
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Snoopy on August 16, 2007, 09:13:12 AM
Much of what happens around Nick is happening around us all ~ the differences are (i) he notices things that most of us ignore (ii) he writes about them in an amusing and informative way and (iii) he is bloody nosey and cannot "walk on by" like any normal person. Now he will glare at me I 'spect.  whistle:
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Miss Demeanour on August 16, 2007, 09:19:10 AM
Much of what happens around Nick is happening around us all ~ the differences are (i) he notices things that most of us ignore (ii) he writes about them in an amusing and informative way and (iii) he is bloody nosey and cannot "walk on by" like any normal person. Now he will glare at me I 'spect.  whistle:

Maybe I should take my blindfold off more often then or at least walk with my head up lol:

Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Snoopy on August 16, 2007, 09:29:27 AM
He hasn't glared at me yet ~ 'praps I'll get away with it.  scared2:
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Barman on August 16, 2007, 10:08:31 AM
I?m guessing that on this occasion the young driver was distracted by the huge illuminated sign on the front of Nick?s house.

I had Paul McCartney in my kitchen.
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits) on August 16, 2007, 10:14:32 AM
I?m guessing that on this occasion the young driver was distracted by the huge illuminated sign on the front of Nick?s house.

I had Paul McCartney in my kitchen.


. . . and the young driver thought, F*ck Me! A chance to be had by Nick in his kitchen - then, BANG he runs into things! Must have really spoilt his day!
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2007, 10:47:07 AM
Today has been uneventful so far, thank you. I went to the HQ of our roofers to give them a bit of face to face smiting. I actually got away with it eeek:

Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2007, 11:50:53 AM
Lady in the Nissan came round last night with a card and a bottle of whisky.

I hate whisky, but said thank you anyway. Her car is a write off.
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Snoopy on August 16, 2007, 11:53:56 AM
Lady in the Nissan came round last night with a card and a bottle of whisky.

I hate whisky, but said thank you anyway. Her car is a write off.

You'll be needing a hand then???? What sort of whisky.
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits) on August 16, 2007, 12:02:59 PM
Lady in the Nissan came round last night with a card and a bottle of whisky.

I hate whisky, but said thank you anyway. Her car is a write off.

You'll be needing a hand then???? What sort of whisky.

Probably Isle of Tesco 6 month old pure malt at a guess.
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2007, 12:04:56 PM
You can have it. Famous Grouse. No point asking if it's any good. Can't bear the stuff
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Snoopy on August 16, 2007, 12:07:44 PM
You can have it. Famous Grouse. No point asking if it's any good. Can't bear the stuff

Aye well aboot 30% o the Famous Grouse is Highland Park Single Malt ~ the rest comes from all over. It is one of the better known and most popular "blends"
We make a point of keeping a bottle or two for those who like their scotch with water or ice (Shudder) because I'm damned if I am going to pay upwards of £35 a bottle for decent malt to see it "added to". I make a point of pouring drinks in another room to where the guests are sat so that Mrs S and I get the malt whilst the peasants who ask for Ginger Ale etc with it get the Famous Grouse. They can't tell the difference anyway but one doesn't wish to appear mean.
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2007, 12:08:29 PM
I defer to your greater knowledge of this ghastly Scottish invention
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits) on August 16, 2007, 12:15:15 PM
You can have it. Famous Grouse. No point asking if it's any good. Can't bear the stuff

Aye well aboot 30% o the Famous Grouse is Highland Park Single Malt ~ the rest comes from all over. It is one of the better known and most popular "blends"
We make a point of keeping a bottle or two for those who like their scotch with water or ice (Shudder) because I'm damned if I am going to pay upwards of ?35 a bottle for decent malt to see it "added to". I make a point of pouring drinks in another room to where the guests are sat so that Mrs S and I get the malt whilst the peasants who ask for Ginger Ale etc with it get the Famous Grouse. They can't tell the difference anyway but one doesn't wish to appear mean.

Reminds me of my Mum that does. She swears she can tell a good whisky from bad.

Now, if I mention that her favourite is Bells you'll see where I'm coming from! I regularly make a habit of buying supermarket blended and putting it in an old Bells bottle I keep for the purpose. Every time she has some she says, "You can't beat Bells you know"

Mind you, she is 99 in couple of months.
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Barman on August 16, 2007, 12:15:27 PM
I would never buy the stuff after that terrible advertising campaign ? who thought of that?  point:
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Barman on August 16, 2007, 12:18:37 PM
You can have it. Famous Grouse. No point asking if it's any good. Can't bear the stuff

Aye well aboot 30% o the Famous Grouse is Highland Park Single Malt ~ the rest comes from all over. It is one of the better known and most popular "blends"
We make a point of keeping a bottle or two for those who like their scotch with water or ice (Shudder) because I'm damned if I am going to pay upwards of ?35 a bottle for decent malt to see it "added to". I make a point of pouring drinks in another room to where the guests are sat so that Mrs S and I get the malt whilst the peasants who ask for Ginger Ale etc with it get the Famous Grouse. They can't tell the difference anyway but one doesn't wish to appear mean.

Reminds me of my Mum that does. She swears she can tell a good whisky from bad.

Now, if I mention that her favourite is Bells you'll see where I'm coming from! I regularly make a habit of buying supermarket blended and putting it in an old Bells bottle I keep for the purpose. Every time she has some she says, "You can't beat Bells you know"

Mind you, she is 99 in couple of months.
Many years ago I worked in a pub ? I used to laugh at the customers that ordered whiskey and insisted that it was Bells. The landlord filled all the bottles up with Vat 69 after closing as it was the Charringtons brew at the time and cost less.  point:
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2007, 12:18:48 PM
I am sure Berek will find something on YouTube which will enlighten us.
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2007, 12:19:41 PM
You can have it. Famous Grouse. No point asking if it's any good. Can't bear the stuff

Aye well aboot 30% o the Famous Grouse is Highland Park Single Malt ~ the rest comes from all over. It is one of the better known and most popular "blends"
We make a point of keeping a bottle or two for those who like their scotch with water or ice (Shudder) because I'm damned if I am going to pay upwards of ?35 a bottle for decent malt to see it "added to". I make a point of pouring drinks in another room to where the guests are sat so that Mrs S and I get the malt whilst the peasants who ask for Ginger Ale etc with it get the Famous Grouse. They can't tell the difference anyway but one doesn't wish to appear mean.

Reminds me of my Mum that does. She swears she can tell a good whisky from bad.

Now, if I mention that her favourite is Bells you'll see where I'm coming from! I regularly make a habit of buying supermarket blended and putting it in an old Bells bottle I keep for the purpose. Every time she has some she says, "You can't beat Bells you know"

Mind you, she is 99 in couple of months.
Many years ago I worked in a pub ? I used to laugh at the customers that ordered whiskey and insisted that it was Bells. The landlord filled all the bottles up with Vat 69 after closing as it was the Charringtons brew at the time and cost less.  point:

I thought you still worked in a pub. Ah, that explains a few things...............
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits) on August 16, 2007, 12:20:27 PM
I am sure Berek will find something on YouTube which will enlighten us.

With regard to what exactly?
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Nick on August 16, 2007, 12:22:50 PM
I am sure Berek will find something on YouTube which will enlighten us.

With regard to what exactly?

Quote
that terrible advertising campaign

Do keep up!
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Snoopy on August 16, 2007, 12:25:56 PM
You can have it. Famous Grouse. No point asking if it's any good. Can't bear the stuff

Aye well aboot 30% o the Famous Grouse is Highland Park Single Malt ~ the rest comes from all over. It is one of the better known and most popular "blends"
We make a point of keeping a bottle or two for those who like their scotch with water or ice (Shudder) because I'm damned if I am going to pay upwards of ?35 a bottle for decent malt to see it "added to". I make a point of pouring drinks in another room to where the guests are sat so that Mrs S and I get the malt whilst the peasants who ask for Ginger Ale etc with it get the Famous Grouse. They can't tell the difference anyway but one doesn't wish to appear mean.

Reminds me of my Mum that does. She swears she can tell a good whisky from bad.

Now, if I mention that her favourite is Bells you'll see where I'm coming from! I regularly make a habit of buying supermarket blended and putting it in an old Bells bottle I keep for the purpose. Every time she has some she says, "You can't beat Bells you know"

Mind you, she is 99 in couple of months.
Many years ago I worked in a pub ? I used to laugh at the customers that ordered whiskey and insisted that it was Bells. The landlord filled all the bottles up with Vat 69 after closing as it was the Charringtons brew at the time and cost less.  point:

Exactly ~ same as the arseholes who ask for a Gin and Schweppes. Firstly why ruin good gin and secondly tonic is tonic 'specially as they always want ice and lemon in it as well. Don't get me wrong I enjoy a G&T but let's not be silly eh?
As for can one tell one whisky from another. Mrs Snoopy grew up in Scotland and went to a Scottish Uni. She can indeed tell which side of the country and often which distillery single malts come from just by taste. Blended whisky is another matter though. Bells, VAT 69, Famous G, Johnny Walker, Sainsbugs own brand ~ all much of a muchness really. Some will be harsher than others is about the biggest difference.
Title: Re: A large bang
Post by: Barman on August 16, 2007, 01:49:47 PM
You can have it. Famous Grouse. No point asking if it's any good. Can't bear the stuff

Aye well aboot 30% o the Famous Grouse is Highland Park Single Malt ~ the rest comes from all over. It is one of the better known and most popular "blends"
We make a point of keeping a bottle or two for those who like their scotch with water or ice (Shudder) because I'm damned if I am going to pay upwards of ?35 a bottle for decent malt to see it "added to". I make a point of pouring drinks in another room to where the guests are sat so that Mrs S and I get the malt whilst the peasants who ask for Ginger Ale etc with it get the Famous Grouse. They can't tell the difference anyway but one doesn't wish to appear mean.

Reminds me of my Mum that does. She swears she can tell a good whisky from bad.

Now, if I mention that her favourite is Bells you'll see where I'm coming from! I regularly make a habit of buying supermarket blended and putting it in an old Bells bottle I keep for the purpose. Every time she has some she says, "You can't beat Bells you know"

Mind you, she is 99 in couple of months.
Many years ago I worked in a pub ? I used to laugh at the customers that ordered whiskey and insisted that it was Bells. The landlord filled all the bottles up with Vat 69 after closing as it was the Charringtons brew at the time and cost less.  point:

Exactly ~ same as the arseholes who ask for a Gin and Schweppes. Firstly why ruin good gin and secondly tonic is tonic 'specially as they always want ice and lemon in it as well. Don't get me wrong I enjoy a G&T but let's not be silly eh?
As for can one tell one whisky from another. Mrs Snoopy grew up in Scotland and went to a Scottish Uni. She can indeed tell which side of the country and often which distillery single malts come from just by taste. Blended whisky is another matter though. Bells, VAT 69, Famous G, Johnny Walker, Sainsbugs own brand ~ all much of a muchness really. Some will be harsher than others is about the biggest difference.
The only problem we ever had was when the dozy old bugger topped-up the brandy bottle with lime cordial. We had to explain to everybody that it was a ?special blend? but they didn?t seem to mind the taste.  noooo: