The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on January 21, 2013, 08:34:57 PM
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Maybe cos I was 58 yesterday. Maybe cos I have been to a lot of funerals in the last couple of years, and one today. The dead person was always saintly and had a rich and varied life and was loved by everyone, apparently.
I wonder what they will say about me, at mine, like? rubschin:
1. He wrote some books
2. He had the odd funny tale
3. He wrote some good reports
4. He was quite tall
5. Um......
What will/should they say about you at your funeral?
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The Policeman stood and faced his God, Which must always come to pass.
He hoped his shoes were shining as brightly as his brass.
"Step forward now, officer. How shall I deal with You?
Have you always turned the other cheek? To my Church have you been true?"
The officer squared his shoulders and said, "No, Lord, I guess I ain't.
Cause those of us who carry badges can't always be a saint.
But I never took a penny that wasn't mine to keep,
Though I worked a lot of overtime when the bills just got too steep.
And I never passed a cry for help, though at times I shook with fear.
And sometimes, God forgive me, I wept unmanly tears.
I know I don't deserve a place among the people here.
They never wanted me around except to calm their fear.
If you've a place for me here, Lord, it needn't be so grand.
I've never expected or had too much. But if you don't, I'll understand."
There was silence all around the throne where the saints had often trod.
As the officer waited quietly for the answer of his God.
"Step forward now, Officer, you've borne your burdens well.
Come walk a beat on Heaven's Streets. You've done your time in Hell."
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1) Her beetle farming years were good years.
2) Her passion for chickens was second to none.
3) She liked her gardening.
4) She wrote a book.
5) She was odd
6) Her greatest wish and what she strived for all of her adult life, world peace and an end to child poverty to be buried in a barrel of Pinot has finally come to pass.
7) Errrr
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1) Who?
2) Is that knocking coming from the coffin?
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1) Who?
2) Is that knocking coming from the coffin?
lol: lol: lol:
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I should like to think that they will be able to say "He was a decent bloke".
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He's going burn a while............. noooo:
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It was luvly and warm in the crematorium.
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Maybe cos I was 58 yesterday. Maybe cos I have been to a lot of funerals in the last couple of years, and one today. The dead person was always saintly and had a rich and varied life and was loved by everyone, apparently.
I wonder what they will say about me, at mine, like? rubschin:
1. He was a ginger shambles
What will/should they say about you at your funeral?
whistle:
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I have penned a draft eulogy for the upcoming service next Monday. At this rate I'll end up writing my own ... razz:
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It was luvly and warm in the crematorium.
at yours they will say
"we should have believed him this time when he said he was dying from man flu"
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sad24:
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Mine will say " Finally, some peace " :thumbsup:
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What would The Brat say? rubschin:
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She wouldn't be there noooo:
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Mine will say " Finally, some peace " :thumbsup:
Is that you or the mourners talking?
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Mine will say " Finally, some peace " :thumbsup:
Is that you or the mourners talking?
drumroll:
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scared:
Mind you, she is a yakker rubschin:
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By that he means I dared to interrupt his monologue evil:
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I reckon mine will say "He never did give us the Ardbeg" redface:
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I reckon mine will say "He never did give us the Ardbeg, and never got his coconut" redface:
whistle:
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I reckon mine will say "He never did give us the Ardbeg, and never got his coconut" redface:
whistle:
cussing: