Author Topic: Fresh from the Inbox  (Read 284117 times)

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Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4635 on: August 01, 2018, 05:06:20 AM »
In Dublin this morning at a busy city centre bus stop, a lovely young woman, wearing a very tight mini skirt, joined the queue waiting for a bus.. When a bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she found that her new skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of that first step of the bus.
Slightly embarrassed & with a quick rather self-conscious smile to the bus driver, she reached behind herself to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg and then once again, she tried to mount the bus step only to discover she still couldn't.
So, now a little more embarrassed, she very quickly once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a bit more, & for a second time attempted to get up onto the bus. BUT found, yet again, much to her dismay, she couldn't raise her leg high enough. Flashing a little smile to the driver, she quickly reached behind for a third time to unzip it even more but unfortunately she still was unable to make the step..
BUT this time, a big burly Kerry man who was standing behind, grabbed her round the waist, picked her up easily & swung her gently up onto the bus.
Ohh . . but she went ballistic. Immediately she turned on the “would-be Samaritan” yelling, "How dare you grab hold o’ me, like that! I don't even know who you are!"
The Kerry man smiled and drawled, "Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda thought we were friends!"

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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4636 on: August 01, 2018, 12:02:39 PM »
In Dublin this morning at a busy city centre bus stop, a lovely young woman, wearing a very tight mini skirt, joined the queue waiting for a bus.. When a bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she found that her new skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of that first step of the bus.
Slightly embarrassed & with a quick rather self-conscious smile to the bus driver, she reached behind herself to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg and then once again, she tried to mount the bus step only to discover she still couldn't.
So, now a little more embarrassed, she very quickly once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a bit more, & for a second time attempted to get up onto the bus. BUT found, yet again, much to her dismay, she couldn't raise her leg high enough. Flashing a little smile to the driver, she quickly reached behind for a third time to unzip it even more but unfortunately she still was unable to make the step..
BUT this time, a big burly Kerry man who was standing behind, grabbed her round the waist, picked her up easily & swung her gently up onto the bus.
Ohh . . but she went ballistic. Immediately she turned on the “would-be Samaritan” yelling, "How dare you grab hold o’ me, like that! I don't even know who you are!"
The Kerry man smiled and drawled, "Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda thought we were friends!"

 lol:
lol: lol:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4637 on: August 01, 2018, 04:16:05 PM »


Warning: May contain Skub
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Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4638 on: August 01, 2018, 04:44:20 PM »
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Offline Steve

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Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Darwins Selection

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Offline Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4641 on: August 02, 2018, 09:45:06 AM »
On my first day at a new school I followed my Dad's advice, walked up to the biggest kid there and just lamped him one! My teaching career went downhill a bit after that.
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4642 on: August 07, 2018, 06:44:33 PM »
A boy and his father were playing catch in the front yard when the boy saw a honey bee. He ran over and stomped it.

"That was a honey bee," his father said, "one of our friends, and for stomping him you will do without honey for a week."

Later the boy saw a butterfly so he ran over and stomped it.

"That was a butterfly," his father said, "one of our friends, and for stomping him you will do without butter for a week."

The next morning the family had sat down for breakfast. The boy ate his plain toast (no honey and butter.)

Suddenly a cockroach ran from under the stove.
His mother stomped it .

The boy looked at his father and said, "Are you going to tell her Dad, or should I?"
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Steve

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4643 on: August 13, 2018, 04:34:41 PM »
Handing over my ID at the post office the clerk says “you’ve aged quite a bit since this picture was taken.”
“Yes” I replied, “I had it taken just before I joined this fuckin queue.
Well, whatever nevermind

Offline Barman

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Re: Fresh from the Inbox
« Reply #4644 on: August 14, 2018, 05:13:56 AM »
Handing over my ID at the post office the clerk says “you’ve aged quite a bit since this picture was taken.”
“Yes” I replied, “I had it taken just before I joined this fuckin queue.

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Offline Nick

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Offline Steve

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Well, whatever nevermind