Disgusterous

Author Topic: Material for apc  (Read 33863 times)

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Offline Just One More

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #30 on: July 29, 2011, 05:54:01 AM »
I've just watched the Simpsons and realised it's a load of bollocks. Who would put a load of funny yellow people in charge of running a nuclear power station?

 ;D



Some bastard's just pinched a pair of my wife's knickers off the washing line. She's not bothered about the knickers but she wants the 12 pegs back

A close call yesterday, the woman next door accused me of stealing her underwear off her washing line. I nearly shat her knickers
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline apc2010

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #31 on: July 29, 2011, 11:12:03 PM »
Need more guys ..........Sunday is a full set .........

Offline Nick

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #32 on: July 29, 2011, 11:33:13 PM »
We should get paid for this rubschin:
Warning: May contain Skub
Cat sitter extraordinaire
Semi-professional crocodile

Offline apc2010

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #33 on: July 29, 2011, 11:35:02 PM »
We should get paid for this rubschin:

You are Bm and I claim my fiver ............

Offline Baldy

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #34 on: July 30, 2011, 12:11:38 AM »
Apparently it's no longer politically correct to direct a joke at any racial or ethnic minority, so try this one:


An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Jew, a Turk, an Aussie, a German, a Yank, an Egyptian, a Jap, a  Mexican, a Spaniard, a  Russian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a  Finn, an Israeli, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a  Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian, a Libyan, a Muslim, a Hindu, a  Buddhist and an African, all went to a night  club.


The bouncer  said, "Sorry, I can't let you lot in without a Thai. "

Offline Barman

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #35 on: July 30, 2011, 05:17:59 AM »
Apparently it's no longer politically correct to direct a joke at any racial or ethnic minority, so try this one:


An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Jew, a Turk, an Aussie, a German, a Yank, an Egyptian, a Jap, a  Mexican, a Spaniard, a  Russian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a  Finn, an Israeli, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a  Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian, a Libyan, a Muslim, a Hindu, a  Buddhist and an African, all went to a night  club.


The bouncer  said, "Sorry, I can't let you lot in without a Thai. "

 drumroll:


He wouldn't remember that lot....  noooo:
Pro Skub  Thumbs:

Offline Baldy

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #36 on: July 30, 2011, 06:01:20 AM »
Dear Deidre,

I was watching my next door neighbour's daughter sunbathing topless from my bedroom window.

As I was knocking one out I turned to notice my wife just stood there, arms folded...watching me.

Is she a pervert?

Offline Barman

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #37 on: July 30, 2011, 06:22:04 AM »
 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Just One More

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #38 on: July 30, 2011, 07:58:09 AM »
My wife said, "How would you describe me?"

I said, "A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K."

She said, "What does that mean?"

I said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, and Hot."

She smiled and said, "That's so sweet, but what about I, J, and K?"

I said, "I'm just kidding."
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #39 on: July 30, 2011, 01:32:25 PM »
My wife said, "How would you describe me?"

I said, "A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K."

She said, "What does that mean?"

I said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, and Hot."

She smiled and said, "That's so sweet, but what about I, J, and K?"

I said, "I'm just kidding."
drumroll:
I mostly despair

Offline Baldy

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #40 on: August 09, 2011, 06:13:38 AM »
Apparently a masked superhero double act were seen on the streets of Tottenham last night.

Blackman & Robbing

Offline Barman

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #41 on: August 09, 2011, 11:45:16 AM »
Apparently a masked superhero double act were seen on the streets of Tottenham last night.

Blackman & Robbing

 lol: lol: lol:
Pro Skub  Thumbs:

Offline Just One More

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #42 on: August 09, 2011, 04:57:10 PM »
Sod buying flypapers in future. I'm gonna get a couple of those Somalian kids, have you seen the amount of flies they attract  redface:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Pastis

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #43 on: August 09, 2011, 09:09:58 PM »
The rioters have looted the BodyShop here; the skin lightening cream went within seconds  redface:
Like the Buddhist said to the hot dog vendor...
"Make me one with everything"

Offline Just One More

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Re: Material for apc
« Reply #44 on: August 09, 2011, 10:33:55 PM »
In further news Tottenham Hotspur have just signed a new Italian striker called Grabatelli...

LiFe - It's an "F" in lie